Fallen Too Deep

(63) Life After

"Are you hungry?"

"No."

"Will you try and eat something anyways?"

"I'm fine."

"Sofia."

"Toby." I countered back. My head didn't move from the pillow my face was buried in, but I didn't have to look up to see the look of disapproval on Toby's face.

"Move over." He sighed. This time, I finally did look up. To give him a what the hell? Look.

"Don't you have homework?" I groaned.

"Yes, but Kristina came to my door saying my best friend needed me. So I'm here. Now move over." I wanted to feel guilty that I pushed Kristina away, but I just wanted to be left alone. And she had been trying to do the opposite, trying to get me to talk. I didn't want to talk.

I wanted to sleep, and forget, and be miserable. Because then that would mean I felt something. I even was willing to welcome feeling miserable at this point, because it meant I wouldn't be so numb. I never felt numb before, it was freaking me out.

Without waiting for me to move, Toby placed both hands under me and shoved me to the side and made himself comfortable next to me.

"Please go away." My voice was muffled as I buried my face in my pillow.

"No. I'm tired, can I spend the night?" He didn't sound like he was asking. I took it as a question anyway.

"No." I answered, to which he snorted at.

"Baby doll, I'm not leaving. We're gonna lay here, and if you don't wanna talk, then fine. We won't talk. But I'm not leaving you alone." That wouldn't be so bad. As long as he didn't try and force me to talk.

"Just lay?" I questioned.

"Just lay." He repeated. "Maybe a hug?" He tried. I shook my head, although I doubted he saw it since I was burying my face in the pillow.

"I'll push you off this bed if you touch me." I warned. Then again, maybe if he hugged me then I'd finally break down and feel something.

"You're going to class tomorrow, whether you want to or not." Toby stated.

"No I'm not." I knew I had to go at some point. But when? Now that was the million dollar question.

"This is ridiculous, Sofia, school's everything to you. You can't just not go." He was right. I wouldn't tell him that though. School was, is everything to me. Now, it's all I have left.

Through my haziness, I did manage to ask for the rest of the week off due to the family emergency I originally took two days off for. God bless my professors.

"I'll go when I go." Was all I responded with.

"Fuck this. You're going to school. I promise you I will drag you out of bed, so help me God. Now set your alarms." Toby nudged me with his elbow.

"Have I ever told you how much I hate you?" I growled.

"No, because you don't mean it. You love me." Love. Such a stupid word. An even stupider feeling. Fuck love.

"Now set your alarms, baby doll, tomorrow we commence operation 'get you to stop being a zombie'." He sounded so cheerful, I wanted to throw up.

💜

Toby wasn't kidding. He also was the worst alarm out there, and I had to set a lot of annoying alarms to get myself to get up. I even had the stupid alarm where I had to solve math problems in order to turn it off, and Toby still won 'most annoying alarm' in my book.