Fallen Too Deep

(60) Different

I almost cried writing this ngl

Sofia

I did everything I could to keep my mind off Nathan. I cleaned the apartment, which Toby lied about 'watching over' for us. He made it a freaking mess. He insisted the WiFi was better in our apartment, so he had spent a lot of time over here.

He was also doing everything he could to get his mind off his ex, and I was doing everything I could to get my mind off my current boyfriend. It was ironic.

I even got ahead in my assignments. I could easily miss weeks of school and be fine now. I got me and Isaac ahead in our Bio class, which I know he'll appreciate since his brain is fried from the MCAT. It was his second time taking it, the first time had been a 'practice' test he'd said.

Just when I excited my bathroom after brushing my teeth and washing my face, I heard a knock at the door. My brows furrowed and I picked up my phone, seeing it was well after eleven. Kristina was fast asleep, and I was about to knock out too. I was too tired to even walk to the door.

I made sure to look in the peephole and my heart skipped a beat and I perked up. Tired? I was wide awake now. I swung the door open and my heart cracked at seeing Nathan on the other side of the door. He looked so...sad. Had he been crying? He also looked devastatingly good in a suit. Oh wow. I was really missing out on suit Nathan. Holy fuck he could pull one off. He looked straight out of a Hugo Boss ad.

"Hi." I wanted to ask what was wrong. I assumed he just got back from his dinner with Cooper. I tried not to be hurt that he shut me out these past couple days, but it did hurt. But he was also here now.

"Is Kristina home?" He took a step inside the apartment and I nodded.

"She's sleeping--" He cut me off by pressing his lips to mine. I instantly melted against him and my body responded to him like it always did. I lost my ability to stop any of this the second his tongue swept across my bottom lip and I opened up for him. His warm hand cupped my jaw and guided my head up, while his thumb parted my bottom lip more.

He didn't pull away as he closed the door behind him and kicked his shoes off. I tugged at his suit jacket until that came off too. And then I pulled back to admire his hard muscles through the white dress shirt.

"You've been holding out on me, you can really pull off a suit." I sounded breathless, but I didn't care. Nathan responded by tugging me back to him, pressing his mouth to mine again in a hungry, passionate kiss. Like he was trying to reach for my soul. And I was gladly handing it over. When he kissed me like that, it was easy to forget Kristina was in the next room sleeping. 

I'm so sorry, Kristina, I'll make it up to you.

His hands cupped my ass and then settled under my bare thighs and lifted me so I had no choice but to wrap my legs around his waist. We were both in a rush to get rid of our clothes, and weren't content until we were both naked.

It was clear that he was impatient tonight. He was different. Something was different.

He reached a hand between us, and when I was good, he thrusted inside me and I cried out against his shoulder. He grunted, and then he pulled out halfway and thrusted hard back into me. He pressed his forehead to mine, muffling out my sounds with a kiss and he was thrusting harder and harder, his pubic bone hitting my clit each time, causing me to shiver under him.

I shivered and when I neared my orgasm, I said the only thing I felt.

"I love you." And then I came. Nathan momentarily stilled and soon as I was coherent to even form a thought, he recovered quickly and kissed me hard, reaching his own orgasm.

And then he pulled out, and pulled me against his chest. He just held me. Didn't say anything.

There was an uneasy feeling in my gut, and I swallowed hard, blinking back tears.

"Nathan." My voice sounded tired. I was tired.

"Shh, just let me hold you like this. Okay? Just for tonight, please." He sounded...broken. It tugged at my heart, and tears pricked my eyes. I didn't hear him say please often. He wasn't ever this in a hurry to get me naked, sure he was impatient at times, but tonight he seemed almost desperate for it.

And then I told him I loved him. And he ignored it. That was an unwelcome memory to fall asleep to.