one hundred nine

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"Anthony, what are you saying?" She says.

"We are done." I say and hang up the phone.

"Good." Rose says with a smile. "Now how about you take me out for lunch?"

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[Olivia's POV] *

I hear the line click off and my stomach begins to turn and I feel like I am going to be sick. How could he do this to me? I thought he cared about me! He told me that he was going to make it work between us and then he just gives up on me. I hate him! But I love him. 

I feel tears run down my face and I begin to hyperventilate. I am pulled into a full blown panic attack and I find myself reaching for my neck once I begin to run out of air. I am sobbing loudly and wrapping my arms around myself. How could he do this to me? He was supposed to take care of me, not make me feel like this. 

My door bursts open and I see Lin looking wide eyed and concerned. 

"Olivia! Baby girl, what's wrong?" He says and sits next to me, wrapping his arms around me. "Shh, I need you to breathe. Can you do that for me?" 

Another pain hits my chest and I collapse into Lin's arms and cry even harder. I am struggling to breathe as he rubs circles on my back and whispering for me to breathe. 

I begin to calm down and Lin asks, "What happened, Sweetheart?" 

"Nothing, I'm fine." I lie, wiping tears from my eyes. 

"You are not fine. Tell me what is wrong." He demands. 

"I can't tell you.." I cry. "All I can say is that I thought somebody cared about me but they actually don't even care about me at all." 

"I'm sorry, Olivia. I love you." He says and holds me in his arms close to him, he kisses the top of my head soothingly. "Look, why don't you come down and talk to the cast while we get ready? That might cheer you up? Anthony just got here, he's probably in his room if you want to go see him." 

"No thanks, I think I just want to be alone." I say. 

He brushes the hair from my face and frowns but says, "Okay, you know where to find me if you change your mind." 

"I love you." I tell him. 

"I love you too, kiddo." He says and kisses my forehead before heading out. 

I stand up and walk into my bathroom, I open up one of the drawers and pull out the box that holds my blades. I pick one up and immediately drag it across my wrists. I guess since Anthony doesn't care about me he won't check to see if I have cut again. I drag the razor across my skin until I am too tired to do another cut. I wrap my arms in a towel and get into my bed and let tears take over me. 

Hours later I hear a knock at my door. I mutter for whoever it is to come in, I look up and see Daveed in my doorway. I pull my sleeves over my arms and sit up. 

"Hey, Lin told me you were going through something. Can we chat?" He asks, sitting next to me. 

"Nobody cares about me." I say letting a tear fall onto my cheek. 

"Don't say that. Everyone in the cast loves you, I love you, Lin loves you, Vanessa, Jazzy, Anthony, and everyone loves you Olivia. Why can't you see that?" He tells me, wrapping his arms around me. 

"I know.. There is this person who loved me and they just told me that they want nothing to do with me anymore. They meant everything to me and I guess I was just a toy that they used for five minutes and got bored." I admit to him. I hope he doesn't know that I am talking about Anthony. 

"They don't deserve you if they treat you like that. You deserve someone who loves you more than the whole entire world. You are worth so much, Olivia. Don't let this person destroy you." He tells me and kisses the top of my head. 

I nod and feel myself growing tired. 

"How about you get some sleep? Do you need me to stay with you?" He offers. 

"No, I'll be okay. Thank you though." I say. He smiles and waits til I am under the covers and turns out the lights for me and leaves me alone in my dark room. My wrists are throbbing and I can't stop thinking. How could he do this to me? Why doesn't he love me anymore? 

Hello everyone, this is a sad chapter but I wanted to give you another one before I go to sleep because you guys are the most amazing readers ever. What do you think should happen next? I need some ideas! Best idea will be used in the story and gets a shoutout (: 

Love you so much guys

- aibhlinn 

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