Finding the Courage to Fly ( A Sleeping with Sirens And Other Bands Fan fiction)

Chapter 54

A/N: So I have a pretty good idea fro where this story is going, but some of you might hate me. Oksy so I think 

Carters P.O.V

I can hear them. Alan and Austin.

"Dude you need to leave or at least get something to eat. I'm her boyfriend and I know she would at least want me to continue my normal routine" Austin, I think said.

" I don't care. I'm not moving " Alan said and it sounded like he huffed and a door slammed shut.  

He has a point. I would want them all to stop moping around and to carry on with there everyday lives but that's no Alan. When we were together he would always hover around me and make sure I was okay. He has always been like that. He won't leave even if god asked him too. That is one of the things I love about him. No matter what he will never leave me alone. I wish I could give him a hug but I can't. I can't move. I just can't. 

" I wish you could open those beautiful eyes of yours. I love looking into your eyes. They are beautiful, just like you. God, I could go on and on about how beautiful you are. Your smile kills me every time and your kiss, god, your kiss makes my knees go weak as cliche as that sounds. I wish I could just hold you one more time. You have no idea how much I miss you. I know I screwed up and I wish you could just give me another chance and I swear I wouldn't let you down. I swear on my life. I need you. I need you carter" he sounded like he was crying now, "God I need you so much. But I screwed up so now I can't have you. I didn't realize what I had until it was gone. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything I did to you. I'm sorry that I was a shitty boyfriend. I wish I could show you just how much I'm sorry but I can't. I would have been a father. I was just scared. I didn't want to give up this life I had. Now I don't care about anything but you. I want to rock out with you like we used to, take you to Taco Bell at two in the morning, and watch a scary movie and cuddle. I want to watch you fall asleep in my lap and listen to your breathing. I want to have kids and raise them, watch them grow ,and grow old with you. I miss you so much. I want to grow old with you and to be buried at your side. Carter, I'm so sorry"  Alan finally finished.

I wanted  to throw my arms around him and kiss him and tell him how much I miss him. I really do. I mean yeah, Austin treats me amazing but I don't feel the same about him that I did about Alan. I love him and I always will. I just wish I could show him that. But I need to break things off with Austin first. I don't want to break his heart though. 

Come on move something.

" Did you really mean all of that" another voice that I'm guessing was Justin, said as he closed the door I'm assuming. 

" You heard all of that " Alan asked as he sniffled. 

"Yeah so did Austin. He was outside the door and was gonna bring you some Taco Bell but he heard you talking and was listening. When he came back to the lobby he sat down and put his head in his hands. I asked him what was wrong and he told me everything I'm telling you" he explained but then the door opened again and Austin asked Justin if he and Alan could have some time to talk and Justin mumbled a "sure" and left.

"Did you really mean what you said a few minutes ago" Austin asked harshly.

"Well If I didn't then I wouldn't have said it" he said just as harshly.

"Sorry, It's just, Alan she means a lot to me and I know she still feels the same about you as she used too. I know she can hear you and I know when she wakes up she is going to break up with me anyways but I just don't want her to get hurt again." Austin said as he sighed and probably ran his fingers through his hair. 

I was really trying to move and I finally moved a finger, the two, then my whole hand. Then my other hand and I shot my eyes open.

I saw a blur of white and then looked straight up and to the side and took in my surroundings.

"Austin get a doctor, she's awake!" Alan screamed and not even a minute later a doctor came in.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

So I am okay, I have a major ligament tear in my knee, and my right arm is fractured but I just have to wear a sling for that.

" Austin can we talk" I asked and he came over to me and had that look like he was expecting what was coming. 

"Before you start I know what your gonna say and I get it. I'm not mad at all and I will always love you but I get it. I really do. You and Alan were perfect for each other and It's fine" he said. Well, that was easier than I thought.

"friends?" I asked and he nodded and gave me a hug and kissed me on the forehead and left the room. Alan soon came in and sat down next to me on the bed. 

"Smile Ashby, I'm awake now" I said as I sat up but he shook his head and gently pushed me back down.

"I heard everything you said" I said and his head shot up and his eyes almost came out of his head. 

"Y-You heard all of that" he stuttered as his face turned a bright red.

"Yeah I did and I'll give you another chance. Alan I really did miss you. I miss you and it killed me everyday. I want you and I really hope that you still feel the same way" I said and his eyes were filled with hope. He smiled and it stretched from ear to ear. He came so close that I could feel his breath on mine. He nudged his lips gently against mine and pulled away after a few seconds and smiled.

"So I guess that means your finally mine again, huh?" he said as he smiled. I couldn't help but smile too. I love this stupid ginger in front of me.

"I guess so" I said kissing him again. I miss his kisses so much. I miss him in general. He pulled away and kissed my forehead before getting up.

"You can leave anytime you want" he said and I smiled and got unhooked the IV and he helped me up and I saw a black Nike back sack on the seat. 

"Those my clothes?" Alan nodded and I grabbed it and went to the bathroom and shut the door. I opened the bag and took out the clothes and set them on the sink. A pair of black skinnies with rips in the knees and a Suicide Silence cutoff tee and some black out vans. I put it on and didn't give a shit about how I looked. I walked out and ran up and hugged Alan.

"You have no Idea how happy I am to be out of that gown" I laughed as I pulled away. His hands lingered on my hips and he looked deep in my eyes.

"Your hiding something" I stated and his expression softened a bit. 

"Carter, your sister, She is gone" he said. 

My whole world came crashing down.

A/N: SO this is the end of the book! Hope you like it!! There will  be a sequal I promise!!! Thank you so much for all the reads!! I love all of you!