Chenford - more depth

Chapter 96

Lucy's pov
"Lucy.."
"Lu.. look at me"
I look at him, my eyes are glazed over. I turn into him, he immediately wraps his arms around me as tight as he can.
"I.. I'm sorry.." i mutter out as I break down crying.
"I am so sorry.. I know you wanted this.."
"Hey, don't apologise" he kisses me on the forehead, he places his one hand on my head holding me closer to him.
"Its fine. Maybe it wasn't suppose to be" I say pulling myself away from him. I put the test in the bin and walk out, I go into the bedroom and start getting dressed.
"Lucy?" He shouts as he walks up to me.
"What?"
"What do you mean?"
"It is what it is. We can try again right?"
"Yeah of course babe but it's okay to feel disappointed about it?"
"Yeah I know. Are you okay?"
"I mean I'm disappointed but we will work through it"
"Yeah exactly. I'm gonna head off to work you coming?"
"Babe you're not due back till tomorrow?"
"Yeah I know but I'm ready"
"Lucy, you're going to work to distract yourself. You need to process this.."
"Don't tell me what I'm doing or what I need to do. I'm fine okay? It didn't happen this time. It is what it is and we can try again" i say kissing him on the cheek as I walk out of the bedroom, towards the front door.
"Babe.." he says trying to hold my hand.
"Tim don't.. are you riding with me to work or?" As I pull my hand away. I know that if he asks me again I'll not be able to hold it together.
"I'll meet you there" he says as he walks back into  the bathroom. I roll my eyes and just head off to work.
As I get in the car driving to work I just stare endlessly I don't actually remember how I got here. All I do is know is that I'm failing once again.
My body is failing me and Tim.
Im used to it failing me but Tim..

Tim's pov
She walks out of the door and I just stand there, I know she's not been truthful with me.
But I can't lie, I'm not being truthful with her. I walk into the bathroom and grab the test out of the bin, just looking at it.
My heart breaks a little at the possibility that this could have been positive. We was both so sure it was, we'd made constant jokes about how it better not be a Bradford size baby as she likes to say.
I just wanted the baby to be half the person Lucy is, I wanted us.
I'm just trying not to think too much about it, as it's our first try but I feel like I should have been able to get her pregnant. Chris did. That scum of a human did the way he did.
I take the test and go and place in my bedside table, and then I get dressed and head to work.
It wasn't often me and Lucy rode separately to work.

Lucy's pov
I walk into the lockers and I see that Angela is in there, i quickly wipe my face and walk in with a smile on my face.
"Morning Lucy"
"Morning"
"You okay?"
"Yeah no I'm okay, how's you?"
"Yeah I'm good, did you and Tim talk last night about everything?"
"I think so, I mean something is still like kind of bugging me about it but I respect his decision into it, I was annoyed at first but"
"Look I don't know what it's about but I'm sure you'll figure it out together. I want you to also know that if you ever want to talk about your parents I'm here"
"I appreciate that, I mean you're a good detective so you'll have probably figured most of it out but I just.. I know.. I should take it further but I cant"
"What's stopping you?"
"I don't want to be seen as weak little girl, and telling Tim was bad enough as I was told if I told him or anyone that it wouldn't end well."
"Lucy you know that no one would ever see you as a weak little girl. And you know that's a threat"
"Yeah no I know that it's a threat, which is why I need Tim to keep his calm when my parents come over tomorrow night"
"Girl from what you told me last I don't think I could keep my calm around them, let alone Tim especially if he knows more. When was this threat?"
"That's why I'm nervous.. and it was all through it all but mainly at the court hearing. And I was hoping I'd have had good news this morning to try and keep Tim happy but as usual I fail" I say half jokingly as I put my stuff in my lockers and turn to head out of the lockers.
She turns and grabs me and turns my body to look at her. "Lucy.. whatever it is you won't have failed" she's reassuringly and giving me a hug.
I hug her back and smile and then i head out off the lockers.
"Chen I didn't expect to see you back today?" Grey says.
"Life doesn't just stop" I say half jokingly and then I walk into rollcall. I look around notice that Tim isn't here.

Tim's pov
I walk to rollcall and I notice Lucy sat on the desk on her own, she just glances at me and half smiles.
I go and sit next to Angela and she immediately turns and looks at me.
"Meet me in your office" she says and turns back to Grey.