Coder Girl /Dreamwastaken/

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Me and Nick pushed each other away, acting way too scared than we should have probably. And I say that cause the way we freaked out made Clay laugh.

"Oh shit, he's laughing like a maniac," Nick whispered, trying to not move his lips so that Clay wouldn't realize that he was talking from the other side of the window, "Is he going to kill me? Again."

"Just smile and wave." I spoke through gritted teeth, waving at Clay.

That made him laugh even harder. I don't know how to react at this point. Should I be scared? Should I laugh along?

"I think he lost his mind." Nick was talking while smiling at the window.

"He's coming, go hide." I joked when Clay disappeared from the window, his laughing turning into coughs as he approached the door.

He came in, barely keeping a straight face. But as he spoke, his voice cracked in the middle of the sentence.

"Why did you push each other away like tHa-"

I'm just scared for his lungs. He's wheezing again.

"Cause why were you standing at the window like that?" I frowned.

"I came to ask for the window cleaner and you were just standing there hugging awkwardly." Now I could hear the genuineness in his voice. He wasn't laughing that hard anymore, he was just answering my question normally with some giggles.

"I helped her get down from the window, we weren't hugging awkwardly," Nick started to explain the situation and failed at it, "I mean we were hugging awkwardly, but it's because I helped her get down."

"Yeah, but why did you push each other away like that?" He started laughing again, probably re-living the moment.

For a moment I thought everything was going to be okay. But then I realized that we didn't have an answer to his question. Well, I didn't.

"Cause you're scary."

There was a silence after Nick's words. Clay's laughing died down momentarily. I hung my head, looking at my feet and wishing Nick hadn't said that. It just brought back unpleasant memories.

Clay was trying his best to come up with an answer. But all that left his mouth were uncertain words that sounded more like stutters.

"I.. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.. uhm. Scare you." He started to chew on the corner of his bottom lip nervously, looking everywhere except for us.

"No, it's okay, he didn't mean it that way." I shook my head, seeing Nick nod to words, "We just didn't expect you to be there, it was like a jumpscare, you know."

"I was just joking, don't stress it." As much as Nick tried to make Clay feel better about what just happened, there was still no progress.

I got closer to Clay realizing that he was silently avoiding any type of eye contact. Slowly raising my hand until it touched his colder one, I tried to get a reaction out of him, but his eyes never met mine.

After a sigh, he finally shook himself back to consciousness.

"Can we talk?" Clay finally looked at me.

I nodded, looking at Nick as a hint for him to leave. But he was dumb enough to nod as well, sitting on the chair for a few seconds and waiting for us to start talking. Luckily, all it took was a head motion for him to finally realize that he had to leave.

There wasn't even a place for us to sit, we only had a single chair. So the conversation started, carried on and ended with us standing.

"What's wrong?" I held his hand, getting a little closer to him.

"I'm constantly trying to improve, but sometimes it feels like I'm the only one who sees the results. It's just.. frustrating, I don't know how to explain."

His words hurt. And it hurt both of us, I could hear it in his voice. I could try to interrupt him and say that it wasn't true and we could see his improvements, but he continued.

"I've been possessive, I know. And I also know that none of you are going to forget about it. But it feels like whatever I do, that's the only thing you think about and remember."

As Clay shrugged, I clung to his torso, hugging him instead of saying anything. I could imagine how hard it was for him to be constantly reminded about something he was trying to change. He just wanted to be perceived normally, I get him.

"I just want you to know that I trust you more than I trust my own eyes. I don't want you to get nervous when I see you around someone else. Please, it makes me feel like a fucking jer-"

I got on my tip toes, pulling his neck down and turning the rest of his sentence into a muffle. He sighed into the kiss, which made me feel like he finally could relax completely. I pulled away, making sure to not let him break the eye contact again and listen to each and every single word I was about to say.

"I'm proud of you. So, so proud." I spoke, cupping his cheek when he tried to look away, "We've both came so far from what we were. Cause we both want to be perfect to each other. And to me, you're more than perfect."

Now I could see why he was trying to look away that desperately. I saw the corners of his pure green eyes glisten with slowly pooling tears.

"I'm such a little bitch, I'm sorry." He chuckled, sniffling and wiping his eyes with his sleeves.

"You're not. I love you." I was about to start crying myself.

I could imagine how pathetic we looked standing in the middle of this empty house, hugging and crying while our sniffling echoed through the walls.

It was kinda funny. And sad. More funny though.

"Love you more." He kissed my forehead, pulling my head back onto his chest where his heart was just drumming.

The whole time I ignored the noises my phone was making repeatedly, and I think that's what caused George to storm in with loud footsteps.

I think he came in with the thoughts of yelling at us, but the scene he was welcomed with probably was too surprising. He stood in his place for a few seconds before speaking.

"Are you- crying? What the fuck?" Narrowing his eyes, he tilted his head to take a better look at us.

And that was when I noticed that his eyes were bloodshot as well. And his nostrils were reddish.

"Are you crying?" I tried to make my voice sound normal, but it came out close to a dying donkey.

"I'm allergic to dust, I told you." He complained, rolling his eyes, "Why are you crying?"

"We're allergic to you." Clay spoke after getting himself back together.

George was silent for a few seconds. And then when he spoke, I could see why.

"Allergic to deez nuts." He took his time to come up with that. And that's really sad.

But from what I could see, Nick had probably warned George to not ask too many questions. Usually he's very nosy, but now all he did was look at us weirdly.

"What's Nick doing?" I cut the awkward silence.

"Taking a shit probably." George laughed.

I was disgusted, but Clay found it hilarious. And I was even more disgusted when we got a phonecall from Nick while he was apparently "taking a shit".

George picked up with an annoyed voice, hitting Nick with his iconic "whOt" immediately.

And the volume was so high that I could hear perfectly what Nick was saying. And it went something like this:

"Bro, can you pass me the dusting cloth? There's no toilet paper in here."