Seaside, California May 5, 2013
Eleanor
I have only been here a week, yet it felt like a lifetime.
Francis had a beautiful estate, the property stretched for miles. There was plenty of space to run and hunt. I had been adamant about not wanting to have human blood. Francis told me there was another way a vampire could live.
Animal blood.
Francis told me it was sustainable, but it was not as potent as human blood. Staying on the animal diet would leave me weaker than vampires my age. But I didn't care.
I never wanted to hurt people ever again.
His live-in housekeeper Susan was very delightful. I was only around her when I was with Francis. When alone I asked that he set up a boundary spell so I couldn't leave the house. I didn't trust myself still.
My friends would call in about 100 times a day. My brother was the worst of them, I was surprised how often he messaged me. Every fiber in my body wanted to go straight to him. Losing our mother was the worst pain I ever felt in my life. I just wanted to be close to him and grieve together.
On my third day here, I got a surprise visit from a friend.
It was Scott, holding three bags full of papers and books. One of them was my backpack.
Francis and I were sitting in his office, going over some things he wanted to start on. Like getting me more comfortable around humans.
Susan popped her head in, announcing his arrival.
When he came in and dropped all of the bags onto the floor I was confused as hell, until he told me there was still a chance I could graduate high school. He compelled them to believe I was ill and would be doing everything remotely.
"And they just believed that?" I had said.
"Yep, and I'm sure you can catch up on everything pretty quick," Scott grinned.
All of this was so strange. Scott and I were friends, but we never really interacted much outside of our friend group. He was always with my cousin; who hadn't messaged me much since the trial.
I could understand why she was distant, I did try and kill her mother. And I hated myself for it.
It wasn't until today that I found out more about what was going on with everyone. I finished all of the work I missed within a day. There wasn't much to catch up on. I would be doing my finals on my laptop. My school agreed to let Francis "watch" me for the exams.
The art of compulsion was useful according to Francis, but I didn't want to take part in it. It was what led me to my death. No one should have the power over someone's will. My complaints just fell on deaf ears though.
I had just finished writing my last essay when I heard the front door open downstairs. I heard Francis and Scott talking downstairs. I didn't wait for Susan to walk up all of those stairs to get me. I was already downstairs before she touched the first step.
I appeared right in front of her just as she let out a yelp.
"Oh my!" Susan shrieked as she jumped back.
"Sorry!" I muttered as Susan held her hand to her chest.
The old lady just shook her head with dismay. "You are going to give me a heart attack if you keep doing that!"
"Susan I thought by now you would be used to people appearing out of thin air," Francis chuckled.
"Well, you wouldn't appear right in front of me!" Susan remarked.
"What's going on?" I asked.
"Scott and I have been discussing your progress so far," Francis began, a smile on his face.
"I think you will be okay around humans, especially your family," Scott put forth.
"What?" I gawked. "I've been a vampire for like, two weeks! I can't be around people right now!"
"Eleanor you haven't lost control at all, even when you first met Susan. I've never met someone with such restraint at your age," Francis admitted.
"So?" I countered. "Besides Susan is so sweet! Who would want to hurt her?"
Susan just blushed as Scott and Francis laughed.
"You wouldn't even go near the bags of blood I have," Francis continued. "Instead, you've resorted to murdering animals. I believe you are capable of self-control around others."
"I still don't trust myself," I insisted.
"Give it some thought at least," Francis added and left the room with Susan, leaving in the hallway with Scott.
He didn't look too happy today.
"So are you hear to give me some more pointers?" I grinned.
"No, I'm here to talk to you about something," Scott revealed. "Let's go for a walk."
I just glanced at him, confused by his behavior. He had been there since the beginning, telling me everything he knew about being a vampire. He made a promise to my mother before she died; he was here keeping his word.
In him, I saw hope for me, that maybe I wasn't damned. But his whole mood today was unlike him.
I followed him out the door and off into the woods. The trees were full and green, and the weather today was perfect. There wasn't a cloud in the sky.
He stopped in the middle of the forest, causing me to almost bump into him.
"Scott, what's going on?" I questioned.
"I need to ask you how you do it," Scott grimaced.
"Do what?" I gawked.
"Keep yourself in control," Scott sighed. "I didn't have a once of self-control for a long time."
"Probably because I haven't been around people?" I replied, unsure of how to answer him.
"You've been around Susan for the past week without a hint of losing it," Scott chuckled.
We kept walking further into the woods until we came across a fallen tree. I took a seat on it and patted the space beside me, beckoning Scott to sit with me. While I wasn't the best at communicating with others, I knew my friends well enough to know when something was bothering them.
I doubt Scott has ever reached out for help when he needed it. He kept everything bottled inside and always put up a strong front.
"Can you tell me what is bothering you?" I inquired. "Is something wrong with you and Lily?"
"No, it's nothing like that," Scott insisted.
"It's something, so just say it, I won't judge," I beamed.
"It was after everything at the lighthouse. Lily fed me her blood again," Scott went on. "It is just always a constant struggle when I'm around her. I am terrified of hurting her again."
He went further into details, his expression getting more distressed.
"I don't know what to say," I lamented. "Is that why you've been so occupied helping me? You can't run from your problems you know. Maybe you should just talk to her."
"If only it were simple. Lily is convinced that she is supposed to sacrifice herself. She doesn't care about her own life at all," Scott fumed.
"Well, what do you think she feels about you sacrificing yourself?" I asked. "You didn't tell anyone how bad off you were at the lighthouse. You were desiccating!"
"This conversation is going nowhere Elle," Scott grumbled.
"Fine we will change the subject," I concluded. "Now, let's talk about why you asked me how I control myself."
"It was only a question, Elle," Scott protested.
"You sure? You can deny this but I think you came here because you want help," I insisted.
"I'm fine," Scott murmured.
Liar.
"Sure you are," I chirped. "Then why ask how I control my bloodthirst? You know the answer."
"Self-loathing?" he guessed.
I just nodded.
"So do I, but it doesn't work," Scott deadpanned.
"Well, you and Lily have a certain issue that makes it worse," I insisted. "Maybe you can try the murdering innocent squirrel diet."
"I rather not," Scott blanched.
He looked disgusted at the idea.
"It wouldn't hurt to try," I reiterated. "Also, you should go to college, I kept forgetting to have that conversation with you."
"I went to high school for Zach," Scott frowned. "He is grown now; I don't need to torture myself anymore."
"School is not torture!" I shrilled. "You need it to make something of yourself!"
"I did three years of pre-med when I was human," Scott grumbled. "That was bad enough. Repeating high school? It was a nightmare."
I just started shaking my head.
"What about Lily, don't you want to go with her?" I pried.
"I'm not going Elle," Scott cut in.
I crossed my arms and huffed angrily.
"Have you told anyone about what happened?" I pried.
"No, only you, Zach and Cel know," Scott admitted. "If anyone else found out I might as well let the sun have me now."
"Why did you tell me the truth then?" I queried.
"I don't know, I just felt like I could," he claimed. "You are one of the few people who understands what I've been feeling like."
I smiled sadly, a rush of grief coming to the forefront of my mind. We both sat there in silence, becoming statues. There were so many things coming up soon. I didn't know if I was ready for them. My mother's funeral was the biggest thing.
They wouldn't do anything until I was ready. I don't think that you could ever be ready for something like that. I didn't think her loss hit me yet. When it does I wonder if I'd ever get past it.
My only comfort was knowing I wasn't alone in my grief.
"Do you think I'd be okay around my family?" I pondered.
"I think you already know the answer to that," Scott commented.
I slowly grinned and got up from the log. I held my hand out and motioned for Scott to grab it. He glanced at me curiously before grabbing ahold of it. I pulled him up to his feet and let his hand go.
"From now on we will look after each other," I announced. "No matter what happens in the future I'll be there for you. I swear it."
Scott looked at me flabbergasted. "Elle you don't need to look after me. You just need to worry about yourself."
"Sure whatever," I dismissed.
"I'm serious," Scott strained.
"I'm serious too. Also, you should try the squirrels," I suggested again.
"If I kill one will it stop you from asking again?" Scott snapped.
"Probably not," I beamed.
AFTER stuffing myself with plenty of animal blood, I think I was ready to go by my house. The afternoon crawled by slowly. Scott and I were in the woods for a while. He did try hunting a squirrel after my tirade of asking him.
Minutes after drinking it he threw up the blood. Perhaps animal blood wasn't for everyone. It was an acquired taste according to Francis.
Scott had been on human blood for too long. I did want to keep encouraging him, hoping it would help curb his bloodthirst. We talked about other stuff as well, such as what happened when vampires didn't feed.
The more he explained stuff the more I saw that he did have self-control. I didn't know why he wasn't blaming it on that. I guess I needed to help him see past that as well.
Just like he was going to get me past not wanting to learn more on how to act like a vampire.
All of that went to the back of my mind when Scott and I arrived at my house. My uncle's car was in the driveway. My mother's minivan was still at Laura's. It was mine now apparently.
"I don't think I can do this," I panicked as I took my first step onto the porch.
My mind flashed to when I left to go to prom. I remember how happy my mother was seeing me off to prom.
I gulped nervously.
"You can," Scot reassured.
I was about to run off before the front door opened, revealing my uncle.
"Eleanor?" he gasped.
"Uncle Rob," I breathed.
Then I felt something slam into me, almost knocking me over. It was my brother Kenny. He pulled me into a big hug. Our uncle wrapped his arms around both of us. I didn't realize how badly I'd missed my family.
I finally lost it and started crying.
"I'm glad you're here!" Kenny cried.
"Me too," I sighed in relief. "Hopefully soon the coven will release me and I can come back home."
My uncle and brother released me from the hug. Then all I heard was the sound of thudding heartbeats and the overwhelming scent of blood. I froze, not allowing myself to even breathe. It had only been seconds but it felt like forever.
I never wanted something so bad in my life. It was just like the night I turned. Except this time I felt the urge to suppress it.
"Well, I'll let you guys have some time. I'll be back later to take her to Francis," Scott cut in, making me snap out of my daze.
"What?" I said incredulously.
"Don't worry, we will bring her back," my uncle Rob clarified.
"Uh, I don't think it's a good idea if you leave," I put forth.
"Elle you are doing great," Scott insisted. "You're in control even if you don't believe it."
I just glanced at him questioningly. Did he not realize I just thought about murdering my family?
"Yeah Elle, you haven't vamped out at all," Kenny reasoned.
"Just because I haven't done it doesn't mean I haven't thought about it," I remarked.
"Do you want to kill me?" my annoying brother asked.
"I do now," I grinned.
"See? Everything is fine!" Kenny chirped.
My uncle and I just rolled our eyes.
"I'll leave you guys to it," Scott smiled and vanished.
"Hey, you can't just leave!" I shouted.
I crossed my arms and angrily sat down on one of our porch chairs. My uncle took a seat next to me and patted me on the back.
"I'm glad you're back kid," Uncle Rob murmured. "It sure has been hell these last few weeks."
I gave him a sad smile. My brother came and joined us. We all sat there for a while, talking about everything that happened. A part of me felt healed, though the large gap my mother left haunted us all. The house felt empty when they invited me in. It looked almost untouched since I was last here. A project my mother had been working on for a client was still spread over the dining table.
I went to my bedroom. It was in a state of disarray. My brother did the honor of helping Scott gather a few of my things. Of course, being a demon of destruction my brother destroyed my room in the process. I started fixing everything immediately.
I was zooming around for an hour until everything was straightened. All of us went into the living room to watch some new film my brother kept preaching about. It was about two idiots who were cops. It was two hours of my life wasted, but Kenny and Uncle Rob loved it.
The humor was abhorrent.
It was nightfall when we went back to Francis' house. I noticed several things that were amiss when we went through the gate. The mansion was lit up inside, more so than usual. That, and there were several cars parked around the fountain.
"What's going on?" I asked my uncle curiously as he pulled next to Cel's Camaro.
"Nothing really," my uncle claimed. "Just a belated birthday party."
"You guys!" I gushed.
I jumped out of the truck and raced to the front door. Right as I opened it, I saw Amberly and Lily in the middle of hanging something above the door.
"Shit!" Amberly exclaimed and dropped a bag of confetti on the ground.
Lily glanced at me with surprise. She was on a very tall ladder.
"Everyone she is here!" Lily screamed and jumped off the ladder.
Suddenly about ten people surrounded us, shooting streamers and those annoying paper blowers.
"Jesus!" I yelped and jumped back in fright.
"Happy late birthday!" Zach cheered and blew into a party blower.
Confetti was still raining down on all of us. Everyone ushered me further inside, the entire entryway was decorated with silver and blue streamers. The entire floor was littered with confetti and balloons. The only person who could've thought of this insanity was Lily or Laura.
The dining hall was also decorated similarly. A huge sheet cake was at the center, decorated with white and blue flowers. Eddie and Amberly started lighting the candles that were all over the cake.
Everyone started singing Happy Birthday to me. I kept grinning, unable to contain my excitement at all of this. Kenny helped me blow out all of the candles.
Finally, after we were done with the cake and opening the insane amount of presents, I got the chance to talk to Laura. She was talking with Margaret when I asked to speak to her alone. Of course, like everyone else, she seemed to have forgotten what happened with Seana.
"There is nothing to forgive Elle," Laura lamented. "You weren't yourself."
"But I still hurt you," I protested.
"I know Eleanor but you need to realize I understand what your situation was," Laura explained. "Besides, you've been doing so well with Francis I think soon you will be okay to return home."
I gawked at her.
"I believe that is a wonderful idea," Francis chimed in.
He and Laura smiled at one another.
"That is if you are ready," Francis added. "If you need to stay longer that is entirely up to you."
"I'll need some time to think about it," I muttered.
This was my first day back with everyone. They all believed I had self-control. I felt like I needed to be tested more. I was surrounded by family, not a bunch of strangers.
"Well whenever you are ready, just let us know," Laura imparted.
With that, they left to go back to the party. Music was blaring throughout the house, loud enough to overwhelm my hearing. I still needed to learn how to tune out things. I had the speeding part down, but I avoided grabbing things or loud noises.
I had already broken enough of Susan's china plates.
I felt a slight tug on my shoulder. Lily had come up behind me, how the hell did I not hear her?
"Hey," she greeted.
The happy-go-lucky look of my cousin was gone. Instead, she wore nothing but black, black eyeliner that gave her cat eyes and had black nail polish on. Her hair was straightened and tucked behind her ears, but her smile was the same.
"Hi you look—" I paused.
"Depressed?" she jibed.
"Edgy," I mumbled. "And sort of depressing."
"Yeah, well besides that how are you doing?" Lily inquired.
"I'm hanging in there," I replied. "I've been meaning to talk to you. We haven't talked much."
"I know, a lot has been going on. The coven has been a nightmare," Lily went on. "My parents are still on the outs. He is still staying with Scott too."
"He lives with Scott now doesn't he?" I chuckled.
"Basically," she frowned. "It's hard now for us to have any privacy."
"Have you and Scott been okay?" I pried.
"Yeah why, does it look like we aren't?" Lily yelped.
"Well I mean you turned goth and Scott has been AWOL a lot, I am just worried about you," I insisted.
"I'm fine," Lily explained. "I was going to focus on school more since my grades have tanked. He wants to look after you and make sure you are going to be alright. But after the blood thing he has been distant again."
"He will come back around, just give him some time," I imparted. "But I am surprised he didn't come to the party."
"He is with Markus right now helping him move some stuff," Lily mumbled. "He told me he'd see me later."
I was going to get him out of this damn phase again. He didn't to start avoiding Lily again.
"Do you want to get some fresh air?" Lily blurted out, her brain bouncing in another direction. "This house smells stuffy."
Lily and I just giggled like idiots and walked outside with our arms linked together. No one paid us any attention when we went out into the yard. The fountain in the middle of the driveway was lit up.
I almost felt like I was in a period film from the 1500s.
I already smelled the smoke before I noticed Eddie was alone out here, puffing his lungs away.
"What are you girls doing out here?" Eddie groaned. "I just needed some peace."
"We came outside to escape too," Lily beamed.
"Can I have one of those?" I asked without thinking.
"Huh?" Eddie gawked. "You despise smoke, Elle. Did you die and come back to life?"
"Well yes," I affirmed.
Eddie looked lost.
"Just give me one," I demanded.
"Elle!" Lily shrieked.
Eddie pulled out a box and took a cigarette out.
"You know these are bad for you right?" Eddie snickered as he lit the cigarette for me.
"I'm already dead, so I don't think it matters," I remonstrated.
I just about hacked my guts out when I inhaled smoke.
"What the fuck?" I heard a voice call out to us.
Cel appeared with Zach and Amberly trailing behind her.
"Since when do you smoke Elle?!" Amberly cried.
I just glanced at her and grinned. My brother eventually came outside as well, wondering where everyone had gone.
"You smoke now?" Kenny shrilled. "Do you want some of this?"
He pulled out a joint from his pocket and offered it to me.
I snatched it from his hand and threw it on the ground.
"What the hell Kenneth!" I fumed.
"What are you kids doing out here?" I heard Laura shout.
All of the adults were staring at us from the front door.
"Do I smell smoke?!" I heard Uncle Rob holler.
"Fuck, here we go again," Kenny mumbled under his breath.
I just shook my head as everyone started laughing.