( FINISHED ) Wings of Fire OC Rating

Permafrost

OC belongs to @Pengiuns4life28

Name: Permafrost

It's alright

Age: 8

Okay

Gender: Male

Nice

Tribe: IceWing/SandWing, though he lives with the IceWings

Oh! Surprisingly not a pairing you see often.

Sexuality: He's still confused and trying to figure it out. Potentially Bi.

Good luck to him lmao.

Appearance: White, with some sand colored scales scattered along his entire body, but especially near the snout, tail, and limbs.
Unlike most IceWings, he only has three horns. All three horns are gold. One is positioned like a unicorn, and the other are pointed downwards and positioned at the sides of his head. They are all shaped like icicles.
He has blue eyes with yellow and white specks. He also has a bronze scorpion tail.

That's an interesting description. Why the unicorn horn? Genetic defect from being a hybrid? Curse? It's cool. However, for hybrids it's especially important to add more details like his body shape, belly colour, etc.

Personality: Appears cold and apathetic, but is fairly easy to irritate. Once he's angry, you KNOW he is angry. (If you have watched Jojo, then it's basically a mix between Jotaro's and Fugo's personalities).

I have never and will never watch Jojo so I have no idea who those characters are. Anyways, this needs a lot more work. Add more positive traits, his fears, likes, dislikes, etc.

Occupation: famous fighter and battle strategist.

Oo I like that.

Residence: IceWing territory, near the Queen's castle.

Nice.

Relatives: Actual biological parents unknown. Adoptive parents are both IceWings. The mother is named Crystalline and the father is named Subzero.

Alright.

Friends: Sleetstorm (goofy, male IceWing), Snowstorm (bold, female IceWing), Komodo (meek, male SandWing). Saguaro (chill, male SandWing. Komodo's father).

I'm guessing Sleetstorm and Snowstorm are siblings lmao.

Backstory: He was the result of a secret project funded by the IceWings and SandWings (they were allies at the time). The goal of the project is to create the perfect soldier. The project was considered a failure because although Permafrost had ice breath, scorpion tail, and serrated claws, he was too big and bulky, thus reducing his agility. Not only that, he was also male, meaning that he was 1) weaker and 2) not able to reproduce. He was adopted by two IceWings. Despite all of these shortcomings, he grew up to be a great fighter.

I like the 'secret project' part, however, (please correct me if I'm wrong, it's been awhile since I've read the series), I'm pretty sure IceWings are super against hybrids because they believe they're the best tribe. I could be wrong, please tell me if I am, but other than that the perfect fighter concept is super cool.
However, this feels like the setup to a fic or RP, so if it's not, I suggest adding more detail about his life growing up, his relationship with his adoptive parents, how he met his friends, if the project affected him in anyway, etc, etc,

Strengths (other): Frost breath, serrated claws, and poisonous scorpion tail.
Weaknesses (other): Big and slow. Cannot read body languages and facial expressions very well.

'Cannot read body languages and facial expressions very well.' Same honestly.

Overall, I give Permafrost a 6/10. Work on his appearance, personality and backstory.