Getting up in the morning has been the most painful thing to do ever since she left. She left us to go join the angels in heaven last week. The only reason I do get up is for our love, our daughter, Melody. She's only a few months old, she needs me now more than ever. Today was an exceptionally sad day, it was the candle light vigil for her.
I got up and saw my mom, who had been staying with me the past week, giving her breakfast. She saw me before coming over and giving me a hug. I went over to my beautiful baby smothering her in kisses as she giggled. I didn't care for food so pinned her quite large amount of hair back so it was out of her face.
We got ready and it was time, my mom drove there because I couldn't focus on anything. When we arrived and I saw everyone, my family, her family, our friends and more. I told my mom to take Melody and I'd join them.
I won't act like I haven't been sobbing on the daily including rightnow. When I eventually did get out I wanted the ground to swallow me. Everyone saw and noticed me but didn't want to hurt me more by maybe saying the wrong thing.
I was eventually met with her family, her mom saw me and immediately came to embrace me.
"you're so strong Daniel. If you need us for anything please let us know"
"thank you, you too"
Everyone grabbed a candle and lit it, my mom came and stayed by me with Melody, who I was now holding. Multiple friends of ours of family members went up on stage and said something. Eventually it was my time for me to go up there. I kissed Melody's cheek and gave her to my mom. It was silent as I walked up, I took a deep breath and looked up.
"this...is not something I thought I would be able to do and I still don't think i'm capable doing so now...y/n...my love...my life...my everything...I never even thought about this, it couldn't possibly happen to us...but it did.
I've never been in such pain...the only reason I go on is our little ray of sunshine...a gift from heaven...Mel."
I looked around and saw almost everyone crying, I took a deep breath to keep myself from doing the same.
"I want to thank you all for coming and showing support but most importantly celebrating her life...she was the most amazing person I ever got to know, the kindest human on this earth, always ready to help, give advice or comfort you...she was the best girlfriend and mother. She loved that little girl with all her heart"
I said chocking up, I looked down for a few seconds as to not let my emotions get the best of me.
"she still does...she loved everyone and everything...i'm not ok and I won't be for a while. I'll need time to heal, i'm very lucky to have so many people that are willing to help. Thank you...thank you y/n for everything you gave me and will continue to give me and our baby...until we meet again...I love you"
I looked up as people lightly applauded, I walked down the stage keeping my head low. I shed a few tears not being able to keep them in any longer. I felt multiple people hug me trying their best to comfort me.
A while later people started leaving, I was holding Melody close to me as people talked to me before leaving. My mom stood by the car and waited for me. I walked away and kneeled down by her engraved stone. I sat down and put her in my lap, I prayed for a bit and sat in silence just thinking for a while.
"Ma-Ma"
I smiled and kissed her. I said bye and walked back to the car. My mom dropped us off at home after I told her I wanted to be alone for a while. It was getting late in the afternoon so I put Mel down for a nap. I stayed with her for a while softly playing my guitar. Her favorite song. I will keep my head up, because that's what she would've wanted me to do.
