Dear Diary

Bed of lies

I ran through the door tears streaming down my cheeks, Sameer called but I didn't stop, so he ran after me. Once outside i found a chair isolated by tree plantations; it was a perfect place to cry because at that moment not a single soul can be seen around that place.

"Aliyah..."his voice came as soon as I sat, just like me he couldn't stop his tears as he sat on the grass right before me. And i poured my self out
Aliya's words in a song:(I know it's crazy, just imagine she said all of that)

"You lied to me when all i ever did was love you, but do you ever think of me when you lie down on your bed of lies? You have no idea how much you hurt me, do you?"

He stared at me his eyes pleading guilty to his crime "I lied to you, but also to myself, and i do not know how much pain I caused you, I will...never know even if I try, please forgive me" he begged while crying.

"You want to know how much you hurt me?" I spat out ragingly in tears. "May be this can tell you how many oceans of tears I cried" then I threw my diary at him and I continued to speak " May be this will tell you how much you broke me, how blindly I trusted you, may be...the pages will tell you how much I loved you, how my heart forever refused to give up on you. Flip through the pages and see how much of me I gave to you, count the pages, count the scars and see how many sleepless nights I had just because I loved you...i..." I was chocked by my own words and I covered my mouth crying.

"I am a monster,... heartless and I don't deserve to be called a human, you are the purest soul I have ever come across, but then I stained you with the filth of my love. I know it was never your fault that you loved me, it was mine that I bit the hand that fed me, all I ever gave you was pain in return for loving me and I am sorry. And I have caused you enough pain, that is why I beg you to forgive and let go of me, I am a soul that doesn't deserve happiness nor forgiveness, so shall it be that I face the tribulations of my own actions. But you, you don't deserve to suffer because of me" His two palms came together to beg me as if I was Buddha, except he wasn't reciting mantras but words from his heart.

"I want you to find happiness after me, all I need is your promise that you will find love after me, please forget the past, forgive me and move on. And if I was the one holding your heart, today I return it back to you after I have failed to take care of it. I am sorry and with time you will see that I really am..." with that he kept mum staring at the cover page of my diary, and I, i was thinking of all the things he just said.
I couldn't tell when he lied to me in the past, but today I know that he said the truth, and I was satisfied that his repentance was genuine. In my silence I saw the two little girls in me "Forgive" they both said to me their master.

We sat there dead silent, so silent that we both could hear each other's heavy breath and silent sobs, had our ears been super effective we could have heard each other's heartbeat. We could hear the birds sing in the trees, alas they were singing sad songs about the two of us.
Then, My phone suddenly rang bringing to an end our minutes of silence, the sound came too sudden that it scared the both of us, he shivered of fear, and I laughed out loud in my head. It was funny enough to make me chuckle softly, that chuckle disappeared as quickly as it came when he looked at me.

"Hello" I picked up the call

"Where are you?" Zeenat asked from the other end of the phone

"Ahm, I am just outside the museum"

"Okay, take care, we will be out soon. I can smell home already"

"That for sure" I smiled before ending the call.