Chapter Forty-Two.

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  D E V I N 

 As I opened my eyes, I found myself alone in the hospital bed. The air was cold as it felt like a blanket around me. I winced as I felt a needle in my arm. It was attached to a bag of fluids that was currently flowing into me. I yanked it out as pain shot up my arm. My feet found the icy floor as I walked towards Aphelia's bed. My face softened as my eyes fell on her and Ryker fast asleep next to each other. I decided to leave them alone as I found my way back to my bed. My body ached as I held onto the wall for support.

"Devin."

I jumped as Locke appeared in front of me.

"Locke." I gasped.

"You scared me."

"You scared me." He repeated back to me. I awkwardly scratched the back of my neck as I looked around the dark room.

Where is Graizen?

"Why are you always finding yourself in danger?" He laughed as he took a step toward me. I walked back to my bed as I wrapped my blanket around my body. The silence in the room was deafening as I stared into his eyes.

"I don't know how to answer that." I finally said. Locke laughed as he sat on the edge of my bed.

"Are you still going to do it?"

"Do what?" Locke was clueless as he placed a hand onto my leg.

"Challenge Graizen."

He took a deep breath as I said this. His face contorted into a look of confusion as he ran a hand through his hair. I looked into him with hopeful eyes. Challenging Graizen was the absolute last thing I wanted him to do.

"No." He sighed.

My eyes lit up as a weight was instantly lifted from my shoulders.

"I'm not fighting him, because if I do, I would lose you."

I furrowed my eyebrows together in confusion as I met his light eyes. Lose me?

"Why do you say that?"

"I almost lost you after I challenged Aphelia. If I fight Graizen, you'll never speak to me again. I don't want that. I care about you too much to let you go."

I let out a deep sigh as he reached for my hand. My heart was filled with guilt as I gave him a look of sympathy with my eyes. I was never going to feel anything for him. Not with Graizen in the picture. I was falling harder and harder each day for him, digging myself in a deeper hole. I'm dreading the day he finds his link. He's going to give up whatever it is we have and plan his life with her. Ignoring the inevitable, I pulled my hand away from Locke.

"Locke, you're going to find your link one day. And, you're going to love them with everything in you."

I assured him as I sat up. My body was feeling weaker by the second. My hands were shaky as I used them to prop myself up.

"No, Devin. I don't want anyone else. I want you. When I heard what happened to you, I almost lost it. I don't want to push back my feelings for you anymore. I'm falling in love with you, Devin."

No.

I felt nauseous as those words fell from his mouth. I've wanted to hear those words spoken to me more than anything, but not from him. His eyes were so hopeful as they gazed down at me, waiting for my response.

"I'm sorry, Locke. I don't feel the same way."

I had to be clear with my words. I could see the pure disappointment flood his eyes as he quickly nodded. Without a second glace, he quickly stormed off. I held my head in my hands in frustration.

I can't believe he did that.

"I can't believe I'm going to do this." I said aloud to myself.

I couldn't ignore the butterflies in my stomach as I paced back and forth in my room.

You can do it, Devin.

My heart raced as I heard his car pull up to my house. I practically ran down the stairs, almost tripping as I made my way to the door. I took a deep breath, calming myself before I greeted him. Jax's eyes lit up as I approached his car.

"You seem overly happy."

"I'm just really happy to see you."

He smiled down at me as we made our way to inside my house.

"I'm always happy to see you, Devin."

I blushed gently as I stared at his lips. This was it, Devin. Make your move. I was about to lean in, until he quickly made his way to the couch. I sighed, sitting next to him. I can't believe I'm doing this.

"Can we talk?"

"Of course."

He leaned closer to me, his face only inches from mine.

"You mean so much to me, Jax. Sometimes, I feel like we were meant to meet each other."

Jax smiled as he put his hand onto my shoulder. I looked longingly into his eyes. This is it. It had to be. I have feelings for him, right? It's not like there's anything else out there for me. There is no such thing as fireworks, or electricity. Love is love.

"You mean just as much to me. I feel like we were meant to find each other, too."

My body leaned closer to his. I was extremely nervous, there was no denying that. But, I have to do this. I'm 17 years old, it's about time I have a relationship. I'm tired of feeling like I'm missing something. It's like I'm incomplete. Jax is what I've been waiting for, right? He has to be. What else could be out there?

"You're like the little sister I never had."

His eyes were genuine as he stared into me. I felt hurt, and embarrassed. There was another part of me that felt joy at his words. Jax was my family, blood or not. It's probably better this way. I still felt hurt, but I still felt extremely grateful to have him in my life as I pulled him into my arms. I hugged him as tight as I could, as he quickly wrapped his arms around me, steadying us.

"Thank you for coming into my life."

My voice was barely above a whisper as I said this. I'm not entirely sure Jax ever heard what I said.

I wiped tears from my eyes as I looked down at my empty bed. I felt an immense amount of loneliness as I curled into a ball, hugging my knees to my chest. I closed my eyes, dreaming of a world where Jax was once again my Jax. 

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