Chapter Three.

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363 DAYS LATER

D E V I N

I used to have this theory. My innocent self always thought that trauma creates our demons nestled deep inside of us. I was wrong. The only thing that conjures up our demons is your own self. Children are the epitome of innocence. One does not stumble across a child and think it would hold the most preposterous thoughts. Our youth isn't when we embark on the journey we call life. How could it be, when we aren't even able to think for ourselves?

"Where are you, Jax?"

I groaned out loud to myself as I stared down at my feet. My body was shaking to the core. I could feel the cold creeping up to my nose and ears. I fiddled with the ends of my scarf. I don't know how much longer my body could bare the cold. The temperature made my skin feel numb, mirroring the inside of me. Numb. My eyes took in my surroundings as I stared into the parking lot. It was filled with lively students, each one of them in their own little worlds. Their own perfect, harmless little words. Eyes scanned over me as they passed by, sending me a sympathetic look as I investigated them. I learned to ignore the look of sorrow everyone gave me a long time ago. It was the same look I gave myself every day when I would look in the mirror.

When I was younger, I always thought looking into mirrors was a privilege. My face would light up like a Christmas tree, smiling back at myself. The older I got, the more I stole as many glances as I could. People care far too much about their appearance. I used to find myself in that group.

Used to.

Today, I go to great lengths to avoid mirrors as much as I can. Even the smallest glimpse into one is enough to send me into a dark abyss. I no longer light up when I see my reflection. It is quite the opposite. I don't recognize the person in the reflection of the glass. I see a scared girl staring back at me. The world becomes an unfamiliar place when you don't even recognize the eyes looking straight into yours.

Then again, the world has always been an unfamiliar place.

My eyes landed on a couple in the corner of the parking lot, who were leaning up against the cold brick wall of the school. They were staring into each other's eyes. The two were completely captivated by one another. It was as if they were the only people in the world. He held her against him, their arms glued to the other's body. I felt a wave of sadness surround me as I continued to inspect them. My thoughts pondered on if I'd ever have a love like that, or just a great love in general.

A loud car engine pulled me out of my thoughts and back into reality. I let out a sigh of relief as Jax's car pulled up right in front of me. The heat from the engine had made its way to me, instantly relaxing against my cold skin. I was about to smile at him, until I remembered he was over an hour late. His engine roared as his tires screeched, causing me to jerk back from the obnoxious noise. My frail hands found the door as I pulled at it, frowning to myself when it didn't open. Jax's eyes filled with amusement as he stared at me. His jet-black hair was a disheveled mess sitting on top of his head. His olive skin appeared lighter under the light, complementing his midnight blue eyes. A smug smile formed on his chiseled face as I shot him a glare. I began to pound my fists on the window. His 2007 Mustang wasn't the most expensive of cars, but he cherished it with his life. I've never spotted a single scratch on the silver coat. Jax claims he isn't one of those stereotypical boys who is car obsessed, but his attitude says otherwise. All amusement dropped from his face as he unlocked the door, letting me in. He shot me a glare, as he opened his mouth to speak.

"Hit my car again, and you can find another ride home, Devinthia."

"You know I hate it when you use my full name."

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