How Did We Get Here // Luke Hemmings & Zayn Malik

Chapter 50: There, I said it

I try to breathe. It all happened so fast. Just keep breathing. Inhale and exhale. Block out everything, close my eyes, and just ignore everything.

Suddenly the car door slams and I quickly flutter my eyes open, seeing my mom run across our lawn and to the bushes, vomiting in them. I sigh, feeling the knot in my throat and a burning sensation in my stomach. I unclip my seat belt, open the door and get off the car. I walk into the house and ignore Vicky's cries for comfort. I slam the door and slide down it.

This can't be happening. It was suppose to be nothing. It had to be nothing. I was sure it was nothing. Why couldn't it be nothing?

Suddenly I hear the front door slam, making me jolt in panic. Few moments later, I hear glass shattering, objects hitting the wall and my mom's screams, sobs and pleads.

I shut my eyes close, trying to wake up but this is reality, my reality.

I haven't cried, sobbed, screamed or even talk since then. I don't think I have the will power to.

All I can think about is how, so many how's run my mind that it overwhelms me.

This was not the way my life was suppose to happen. It couldn't be the way.

After a few hours of staring at the wall, I could hear Harry's voice echo the house. I crawl over to my bed and recline against it.

He slams my door wide and looks at me with a blank face. I look up at him and say nothing. I just nod yes. He closes his eyes, sighing "Yes you are? Please tell me no." I look down at my stomach and rub it gently, nodding yes. He starts crying and kneels in front of me.

He sits next to me, gripping me into a hug and rubs my back.

We stay silent and I just hear him sob. Something's wrong with me, because I'm not crying.

By the afternoon, I can hear Wilbert's voice echo the house. He's looking for both of us.

Harry takes me to the where Wilbert is cleaning up the things my mom trashed.

Suddenly I see my mom coming down the stairs quietly. I just stare at her, looking to see her expression but it was blank. There were no emotions on the surface.

She stands in front of me, with Wilbert at her side. Harry sits in the corner of the room, looking down at his shoes.

She sighs, wiping the dry tears from her face "Were flying to London tomorrow. Were telling your dad and Zayn."

I close my eyes and feel hopeless. Zayn. What will everyone think? My dad.

She walks away and leaves up stairs to her room, slamming the door. Wilbert sighs, sitting next to me and hugs me "I'm here for you Emma. Anything, I'm here, supporting you." Harry gets up "Same thing Emma, I'll always be here for you." I smile and walk to my room alone.

I pack a small suit case and dread everything happening tomorrow.

We are dropped off at the airport by a taxi. We get on our flight and stay silent all the way through.

We get a taxi and drive to my dad's house. Just looking at everything brings back so many memories. Anywhere I look, I remember all the places we used to hang out.

Rolling up to the apartment and seeing my father's car still in the driveway, made me feel nauseous.

My mom walks in, throwing her stuff to the floor and yells "Hayden! Were here!" My dad runs down the stairs, looking at me. My sister hovers by the kitchen, looking and judging. I sigh, putting my stuff on the floor quietly "Dad?" He looks scared and confused "Please tell me it's not true Emma. Please tell me it's not." I stay quiet, looking down at the floor.

Then Natalie walks passed me, bumping into me, almost knocking me over. I know she's disappointed but I didn't think she would be rude about it.

The next morning, Zayn came to pick up Natalie for school. I'm guessing it's the norm, since Natalie's school is 10 minutes away from his.

Zayn walks in, super surprised to see me and my mom sitting in the couch "Emma!? Ms. Johnson? What are you guys doing here?" Just hearing his British voice brings me butterflies until it is shattered when my mom screams to him "Sit down Zayn!" we all sit in the living room.

Then my mom looks at me "DO you have anything to say to him Emma?"

This would be the first time I've said it aloud. It would be the first time I've admitted it publicly. I can already feel the knot forming in my throat. I can feel the tears forming.

I unevenly say "Zayn the reason I'm here... the reason I came was to... um, I want to um... Zayn I'm... I'm pregnant."

His face becomes pale; all emotions drain from his face and nothing comes out. He just dips his head and sways it disappointingly. I close my eyes and wish this wasn't true.