Chapter 44

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Matt's POV

I felt bad when Alex left, seeing me sitting on the stairs and I just sensed that she thought something was up when it really wasn't. I honestly wasn't avoiding Alex, okay maybe I was a little but it was only because I had an appointment with Karen today and I kind of felt like I was going behind Alex's back. I wanted to tell her, I really did, but I wanted to talk to Karen first.

After she left I grabbed some breakfast and showered, I wanted to time leaving perfectly so I didn't run into Alex, I didn't want to explain where I was going, I didn't want to lie to her. I wanted Alex to trust me more than anything and I was just worried if she found out I was seeing Karen she'd be upset, but I was honestly only seeing Karen for us, I wanted us to work and I wanted to do anything to make sure it did.

"I've got an appointment." I told Lola and Brian, getting ready to leave. They were in the pool, mucking about. "Tell Alex I won't be long."

"No problem." Lola said, but as I left I wondered if they'd heard what I said anyway.

I headed down to Karen's office, my appointment was half and hour after Alex's and I really didn't want to run into her so I sat in my car and headed into the office only a few minutes before my appointment.

"Matt, hello again." Karen greeted me, leading me into her office. "How are you?"

"Pretty good." I said sitting down, making myself comfortable.

"Is everything okay?" She asked. "Everything okay with Alex?"

I smiled. "Everything is great with Alex."

"Good, I'm glad. She's a lovely girl."

I nodded, she certainly was and she was my lovely girl. "How is Alex?" I asked her.

She smiled. "Well you know I can't discuss much Matt but Alex is doing very well and you have a lot to do with that."

I exhaled loudly. "Good, I was hoping I did."

"She's very fond of you."

Fond, ha, I'd almost say it was love. "I'm pretty wrapped in her."

"Good. Now what can I help you with Matthew?" She asked. "It seemed like you really needed to speak to me."

"Yeah, look, I'm sorry, I just wasn't sure who else to turn to." I explained. "Well I love spending time with Alex, if you ask me even though I spend almost every minute of the day with her it just doesn't seem enough." She smiled nodding. "And well Karen, oh god, it's sex, I found these damn books that she had and I'm trying to be understanding and give her time and space, I mean I'll wait as long as I have to but damn, Alex keeps doing these things and it's driving me insane."

She laughed. "Oh Matt, the books, they were mine, I gave them too her to read."

Well that explained a lot. "Okay well that's okay but sex, fuck, when do I know it's the right time?"

"Have you spoken to Alex about this?" She asked.

"Well no." I told her. "I haven't. I don't want to upset her, make her think I'm only interested in sex, because I'm not."

"It's fine Matt. Alex and I have spoken about how sex plays a very important role in a relationship."

They'd spoken about sex? Sex with me?

"Alex understands sex is important Matt and she wants to make this work with you."

I nodded. "I want to make it work, but I don't know what I should and shouldn't be doing, I mean I'm scared if I touch her in the wrong place she might freak out and I'll fuck everything up."

"And that may be true Matt, but it's something only you and Alex can decided, talk with her, I mean touch her the way you want, I'm sure Alex will let you know if she isn't comfortable with it." She explained. "Try Matt, you might be surprised."

"I guess." I mumbled, that was the problem, I was too scared to try.

"Matt." Karen said, snapping me out of my sulk. "You and Alex are adults, for god sake." She smiled. "act like it."

I nodded standing up. She was right, we were adults and I guess we needed to start acting like it.

"Thanks for listening." I told her.

"Anytime Matt, just call." She told me walking me to the door. "And like I said you're making a huge difference to Alex, huge, she adores you.

I smiled as I walked to my car, she adored me and I was glad, but Karen was right, I guess if I did do something with Alex she didn't like she'd tell me. I just needed to stop worrying about it and trust Alex to let me know what was right for her.

I got back to my car and headed back to Alex's place. I was looking forward to relaxing and spending the day with her and who knows, if she feels like it, I might even take her out to dinner somewhere nice, a nice date.

I got home, walking inside and I could hear everyone out the back. Sarah and Zack were obviously here because I'd seen their car out the front and as I walked out I tried not to laugh. Lola and Sarah were talking with each other , Brian was in the pool and Zack was sitting there glaring at him.

"Hey." I called and they all looked at me.

"Where have you been?" Lola demanded.

I shook my head. "Where's Alex?" She wasn't out here.

"I  don't know, she went to get in her swimmer's a while ago but she hasn't come back out yet."

"Well I'll go get her." I told Lola smiling and walking back inside.

I had a quick look around downstairs then headed upstairs obviously she was in her room and I knocked lightly on her door.

"Yeah." She called out.

I opened the door and she was sitting on her bed. "Can I come in?"

"Of course." She said smiling and I smiled back, walking over and sitting next to her.

"What are you doing?" I asked softly.

"Getting changed." She said matter of factly. "But I kind of lost track of time."

"Is that a good thing?"

She shrugged, looking at me and I reached out, pulling her into my arm's. I looked down at her and kissed her softly. "I missed you this morning." I murmured.

I felt her smile against my lips. "I missed you."

"Good." I whispered in between kisses. "Now World War 3 is about to break out downstairs, wanna go watch?"

She threw her head back and laughed and I couldn't help myself, I kissed her neck softly. "I guess we should." She murmured.

She was right, we should, only I didn't want to and I pulled her closer, kissing her some more.

"Come on." I murmured, dragging myself away from her, I had too, I wanted to do things to her, touch her, but I sure as fuck wasn't doing it while everyone was downstairs.

"Okay." Alex said softly and much to my delight, she looked disappointed.

"Later okay." I murmured kissing her again and she smiled and nodded.

"Yes, later." She whispered. "Now let me get changed."

"Can't I watch?" I joked, only I wasn't really joking.

"Matthew." She said, pushing me playfully. "Later remember?"

And I nodded, turning and leaving. I could not wait for later.

"I'll meet you out here." I told her.

"Okay." She smiled.

Holy fuck. Later.

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