Chapter 58

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Lola's POV

"What are you doing babe?" Brian asked, walking in to the living room, where I was lying on the couch.

"What does it look like." I snapped.

"Fuck Lola." He snapped back. "Stop taking this out on me."

I glared at him. "I'm not."

"Yeah." He grumbled. "You have. Ever since you moved in here you haven't been civil to me."

I stood up. "Fine." I yelled. "I'll move out." And I turned away, grabbing my bag and heading for the door.

"And where the hell are you going to go?" He snapped. "You're best friend kicked you out remember." The sarcasm dripping from his voice infuriated me.

"Go fuck yourself Brian." I told him, slamming the front door behind me and I meant it, he could literally go fuck himself.

I ran to my car, jumping in and starting it. I had no clue where to go so I just started driving until I found myself at Matt's. We hadn't talked much over the past few day's, we were both hurt and confused but I needed to speak to him, there had to be some reason for Alex's behaviour.

I got out of the car and walked to the door, knocking. I stood there for what seemed like ages. Maybe he wasn't home? And I was about to return to my car when the door opened.

I turned, looking at him, and geez, he looked like hell.

"Oh Lola." He said, sounding disappointed.

"Yeah." I mumbled. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah, of course." He said, stepping back to let me past.

"How have you been?" I asked him but I already knew the answer just by looking at him.

He shrugged. "Drink?" He asked, changing the subject.

"No Matt." I said. "I do not want a drink. What I want to know is why Alex is doing this, cutting us out of her life."

He sighed, falling on to the couch. "I don't know Lola." He said softly. "I've tried to see her, everyday I've tried, they won't let me in, told me she doesn't want to see me."

"Well there has to be a reason."

"Yeah there is." He said, rubbing his face. "She blames me, I couldn't protect her so she blames me."

"Bullshit Matt." I snapped. "That's bullshit. If she does blame you then she's not worth it. You don't want someone like that in your life." Only I knew it wasn't true, I knew Alex wouldn't blame Matt, she loved him, I knew it. Something else was going on and I needed to find out.

"But that's the problem Lola." He said softly. "I do want her in my life, I just.........I just feel lost without her."

I smiled at him. "It will be okay." And it will be, because I was going to make sure it was. "I'll find out what's going on with Alex and before you now it you'll be back together."

"How Lola?" He asked. "How are you going to find out. She's made it clear that she wants nothing to do with any of us."

He was right, but I had an idea, there was someone that I knew Alex wouldn't turn away. "God Matt this is just a fuck up."

He nodded and fuck me, he looked so miserable. "I'm going to see Karen tomorrow, maybe she has some insight into what exactly is going on with Alex."

"That's a great idea." And it was, maybe Karen could even speak to Alex. "Anyway, I only called in to see how you are."

"Fucking horrible."

I hugged him. "Come over to our place tonight, we can just hang, you need company."

He nodded, returning my hug. "Yeah you're right, I do, sitting here all I'm doing is thinking about Alex and you know what Lola, maybe it's over between me and her, maybe I need to realise that."

"Don't be silly." I said, opening the front door. "You and Alex belong together. This will never be over."

And it was true, out of all of us, it was Matt and Alex who had the best relationship. They never argued, ever, I'd never seen them argue, they had a mutual respect for each other and they'd sit down and discuss things, they were content with the other's company, as long as they were together they were happy and that's why I knew, I knew in my heart that Alex was hurting as much as Matt. There had to be a reason for her decision, she loved Matt too much to just discard him like this.

I arrived at my next destination and climbed out of my car, making my way to the door and knocking.

"Sis." Zack exclaimed, opening it and hugging me. "You staying a while?"

"No." I said, returning his hug. "I've come to speak to Sarah."

He looked at me oddly because never, ever have I come to visit Sarah, ever. "Um okay."

I walked inside and Zack pointed to the kitchen and I wandered in to find Sarah cooking away, looking glum. She really was a domestic goddess and I was so fucking jealous of her.

"Hi." I said quietly and she stopped, looking at me.

"Lola." She said, surprised. "Are you staying for dinner?"

I shook my head. "No, I just came by to ask a favour of you."

She smiled. "I'm going in the morning Lola." She said quietly.

"You are?"

"Yeah, Matt is a fucking mess and none of this makes sense." She said shaking her head. "And yeah, I don't know why but I'm pretty sure Alex will see me."

I smiled. "I know. I had exactly the same thought, that's why I came over."

She looked at me  and she looked sad. "I just worry about her, her past is so horrible and I can only imagine what is going through her head, to make her do this."

She was right of course, who knew what Alex was thinking. "Matt's going to see Karen."

"And that's a great idea." Sarah said. "Hopefully between the two of us we can sort this out because if I have to look at Matt's miserable face one more time."

I laughed. "Thanks Sarah."

"You're welcome." She said softly. "You're all my family now and I'll do anything for anyone of you."

I hugged her, she was right, we were all family.

I headed home and let myself in, Brian was laying on the couch and he held out his arm's as I walked in. I laid down beside him, letting him kiss me.

"It will be okay babe." He murmured.

He was right. Of course it would be okay. Wouldn't it?


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