Chapter 55

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Matt's POV

I couldn't believe it. I just could not believe any of this had happened. This morning Alex and I had laid in bed talking, we had a nice breakfast. she saw Karen, we laughed, we kissed, we hugged, we made plans and now I was here, sitting in a hospital wondering what the hell was going on. Brian had gone to find out what was going on and Lola had gone to see about getting me cleaned up because I had Alex's blood on me.

I groaned. I had Alex's blood on me, her blood, because she'd been shot and now I had her blood all over me.

I started subconsciously rubbing my hands up and down my leg's, trying to get the blood off, her blood, oh god Alex's blood, it was on me.

"Matt?"

I looked up and Lola was standing in the doorway, looking concerned.

"Have you heard anything? Where's Brian?" I demanded.

"He's just speaking to the nurses Matt." She said softly. "It's okay, she's in the best place she can be right now."

"No." I said standing up. "The best place she can be is with me, not in some fucking surgery because that dickhead shot her. FUCK." I yelled. "He shot her."

She walked over to me, hugging me, I couldn't respond, I just felt so angry.

"Here." She said holding out a shirt. "Get changed, wash up."

"NO Lola. I want to know what's going on with Alex, I don't want to clean myself up."

"Okay." She said calmly. "Okay."

She turned and walked back out the door but this time I followed her. I'd find out what the fuck was going on myself.

I spotted Brian, talking, smiling to some nurses and I walked straight over. "Well?"

"She's still in surgery." One of the nurses explained.

"And what?" I snapped. "That's it?"

"That's all the information I have at this moment Sir."

"Fuck me." I snapped.

"Look Matt." Brian said, putting his arm across my shoulders. "Come with me, get changed, you're kind of scaring everybody." And I looked around to see several people looking at me, shocked.

I let him lead me to the bathroom and he turned on a tap.

"Matt." He said facing me. "You need to try and calm down. They're doing everything they can okay, so all we can do is wait."

"How the fuck can I calm down." I snapped. "Alex got fucking shot. Do you understand?"

"Yes, I understand, but Matt, there isn't much we can do right now."

I shook my head and turned to the basin, washing my hands, watching Alex's blood mix with water and go down the drain. Alex's blood, I had it all over me.

I closed my eye's. She was going to be fine. He would go to jail, Alex would move into my place and everything would be fine, all of this would be over.

"Here." Brian said handing me some paper towel.

I dried my arm's and hands. "Alex." I said softly, feeling an ache in my chest. I needed to see her. I needed to be with her and she needed to be okay.

"I know."

"She'll be okay won't she?" I asked nobody in particular. I needed her to be okay.

"Of course she will." Brian said. "She needs to be at our wedding, Lola would lose her shit if she wasn't there."

I nodded, yeah, Alex was looking forward to being bridesmaid, so yeah she'd be okay.

I groaned again. That was the dumbest thing I'd ever heard in my life. She wanted to be bridesmaid, ha, what a joke.

"Fuck." I snapped, pulling a shirt over my head. "Fuck."

"Matt, calm."

"You know what Brian, I'm trying to be calm, I really am, but my girlfriend, the woman I love, hell the first woman I think I've ever really loved could be dying and I'm standing in a shitty little bathroom washing her blood off of my hands."

I took a deep breath, closing my eye's.

Alex and I had come so far, from the shy girl I'd first met when Lola had moved in, the girl who hardly spoke to me, the girl with a secret past. Now she was free of that asshole and she was mine, my beautiful girlfriend, we had no secrets, we were happy being us, and us, together, well we were pretty fantastic together and I wasn't willing to let that go. I was not letting that go. I refused to let that go.

Alex was my everything and if she pulled through this I was happy to tell her that over and over again for the rest of our lives. I would tell her that over and over for the rest of our lives.

Every single fucking day.



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