Unfulfilled Desires

Kiss with feelings

"Riya's point of view,"

It wasn't simply a kiss; it was a declaration of my love for Harsh. Our lips were moving faster, and my brain had entirely shut off. The more I felt for him, the more painful it was to lose him. I wanted to convey to him my anguish at being apart through this kiss.

I did not know when the tears ran from my eyes as I kissed him. We stopped our kiss when we both ran out of oxygen. Harsh's eyes were filled with tears when I opened my eyes. I have only seen him cry once in my life, and it was when I was tried to leaving him alone to travel to another city.

What might be the source of his tears today? He has forgotten about me and moved on with his life. He reached out to wipe the tears off my cheek. I felt a peculiar sense of relief as I felt the warmth of his palm. My hands extended in front of him as if to wipe the tears from his heavy eyelids.

"Sorry, Harsh. I didn't want to betray you. I tried everything I could to stop myself, but I'm not sure what happened to me."

"What would you do if you found yourself in my shoes?" I didn't know what to say when I heard his query. What would I do if I were in his place? I would have been furious with him and possibly attempted suicide if I had known, but I can't tell him because what if he commits suicide after listening to me? No, I will not tell him that. If something happens to him, I will perish simultaneously.

"Why are you silent, Riya? Respond to my point." He waved his hands in front of my eyes, interrupting the conversation I was having with my subconscious. So, what should I say to him now?

"I would have done the same thing if I had been in your shoes. I'm putting my past behind me and moved on in my life." While looking at him, I uttered my words.

"Why don't you wait for me to return?" He inquired, his gaze fixed on my face. Perhaps I should have waited for him to return. But why is he asking me this question?

"Will you sell me your land if I don't respond to your question?" I'm scared that by blackmailing me repeatedly in the land's name, he'll learn about my hidden feelings and hurt me later.

"No, I will not do what you're thinking." Hearing his response, I felt as if he was listening to my inner monologue.

"What makes you believe you know what I'm thinking right now?" My tone was skeptical when I inquired.

"I've told you before, and I'll tell you again today, that I know exactly what you want to tell me and what you want to keep hidden from me." It persuaded me he was expressing the right thing when I heard his confident voice.

"But why didn't you stop me from approaching Rachit if you understood everything, saying nothing to me?" I realize that recalling the past will only generate problems, but I'm curious why Harsh did not intervene.

"I stopped you from becoming friends with Rachit, but you didn't listen to me. Do you remember?"

"Yes," he told me not to talk to him, but I couldn't stop myself from approaching him.

I keep wondering to myself, How can I go back to Harsh's life when all the doors leading to him have been closed to me?

"Does your wife cook better than me?" I had no choice but to enviously look at his wife and compare myself to her.

"Do you feel envious of her?" He asked with a smile, his gaze fixed on me. When I mentioned his wife, he immediately began defending her in front of me, although he was often teasing me about something or other. If he feels possessive only after hearing his wife's name, and I tell him that seeing him with his wife makes me want to kill her, he will undoubtedly become enraged, and I do not know what he will do with me in wrath.

After all, she is the mother of his child, so he must be possessive.

"No, I'm not envious of her; in fact, I'm glad you're content with your life." I want to be pleased with him, but I'm not sure why I can't stand seeing him with his family.

"Riya, I still miss you terribly; please return to my life." I was listening to his statements with incredulity in my eyes. What is he saying, and is he even aware at this point?

"Have you gone insane? I cannot do this."

"Do you not like me, Riya?" Apart from pain and discomfort, I could detect an unknown feeling in his eyes. Seeing him at this point made me think he wanted me to return to his life.

"Of course, I love you, and I only love you. But I can't live in your life as an extramarital affair."

Before saying anything else, he put his finger on my lips and silenced me.

"Harsh you..."

"I instructed you to be quiet," and this, he gripped my lips with his lips once more. However, this kiss was not as smooth as the first. He entirely engrossed his lips in kissing my lips, demonstrating his dominance. I didn't understand why Harsh became so dominant. I experienced the same sensation as when we first kissed while kissing him. But now, instead of our emotions being communicated to each other, it has generated lust between us because of this kiss.

He had one hand in my hair and the other on my waist, both firmly gripping me. My fingers unbuttoned his shirt. What am I doing, oh no? How can I free myself from the desires that have already damaged everything? Today, Harsh is going to make the same error. How can he possibly betray his wife? No, I cannot and will not permit him to do so.

I pushed him as hard as I could and began racing towards the road from where he had come.

"Wait, Riya, at least listen to me." To stop me, he was rushing behind me.

What exactly have I done? How did my unfulfilled desires express themselves in this way? I would have committed a major sin again today if I had not maintained proper self-control. I'm already feeling guilty. Yes, I no longer have the guts to burn in the flames of regret.

Why did I tell him about my innermost feelings? His wife is not at fault in all of this, despite how much she loves him. Who am I to lay fire to their blissful existence? What will his son think if he learns his father has cheated on his mother?

Why do I always complicate my life to where, to fix a relationship, I have to either break it or damage myself?

"Please, Riya, stop. Your leg hurts and is bleeding." He was still following me down. But I wasn't thinking about my injury at the moment; instead, I was thinking about something that happened a while ago, and my steps were instinctively running away.

"Please, Riya, stop one last time and listen to the whole of my story." He pleaded with me to stop. My steps, however, were not in the name of stopping.

"Riya, please stop. Please don't wait until it's too late and you've missed your chance to repent." I came to a halt as I heard his comments. But it was too late as soon as I looked at him. A speeding vehicle from the front had hit Harsh before I could say or hear anything.