Unfulfilled Desires

Where is my child?

"Riya's point of view,"

I slowly opened my eyes and was surprised to see Ankur standing in front.

"Ankur, you are here?" I could not understand from where suddenly Ankur had come in front of me.

"Riya, are you alright?" There was concern for me in his eyes, but along with the concern, I could see a lot of questions on his face.

Wait, he is asking me such a question, what has happened to me? I took my eyes off Ankur's face and looked around me. Where am I As much as I remember, a car was illuminated in front of me, after that I could not understand anything after seeing myself here in this hospital.

"Ankur, where am I?" I asked in a worried voice.

"Relax Riya, you don't need to panic, you are absolutely safe and under my care." He assured me.

"But how am I here?" I still can't understand what happened to me.

"Don't you remember that you had an accident," he asked while checking the monitor next to my bed.

"Accident?" I immediately got up from the bed and tried to see my body. But as soon as I moved, the pain in my stomach forced me to lie back on the bed.

"Riya, you have had a major accident, so you should not hurt yourself at this time." He said while helping me lay on the bed.

Oh no, my baby.

My hand went towards my belly. I was praying to God in my heart that nothing should happen to my child, but as soon as I touched the belly, my hand went on the straps tied on the belly. No, it can't be. I can't lose my child.

"Ankur, m.. my child." I cannot lose it, Lord, Ankur, tell me that whatever I am thinking is a lie.

"Riya, I told you just now that you have had a major accident, and....," leaving his sentence incomplete, I do not know in what deep thought he sank.

"What's more... ,"his silence was deepening my suspicions.

"I am sorry Riya, I tried a lot during the surgery to save your child but I could not save the child." He replied in remorse with his eyes fixed on the hospital floor.

"How can you do this to me, you have any idea what this child meant to me. Better yet, you would let me die too." I could hardly put out my voice in the midst of my tears.

"Take care of yourself," he said, wiping tears from my cheek. Maybe he does not know that since when I have been trying to take care of myself, and now after the passing of this child, there is nothing left in my life with which I can live.

"Ankur, what shall I do now?"I asked trying to stop the tears filled in my eyes, but my tears were not taking the name of stopping today.

"Have faith in God, with time everything will be fine." He was trying to console me. But maybe he didn't understand the meaning of my question, he probably had no idea at all how well I have made a spectacle of my life.

"You know what happened to me," I am still trying to stop my sobs But I was not able to tolerate such suffocation inside me, so I thought of telling everything truth to Ankur right now.

"Riya, I think you should take rest for sometime now if you are constantly like this. If you continue to panic, I am afraid that your health may not deteriorate."

"But if I kept this truth hidden inside myself for a while, I don't think I would be able to live any longer because of guilt." Hearing me, his steps stopped at the same place. He immediately turned back and looked at me and gestured for me to continue my talk.

"Ankur, I have made a big mistake, I don't understand what to do now," listening to me, he was looking at me in surprise, he could not understand what I am talking about .

"Riya, tell me clearly what is the matter." Hearing the panic of his voice, I could understand how nervous he was seeing my condition.

"Ankur, I wasted my everything in the pursuit of fulfilling my unfulfilled wishes. Whatever Rachit did to me..,"I again drowned in sorrow.

"What unfulfilled wishes are you talking about?"He asked looking at me in a confused look.

"The desires that awoke in me on the Shimla trip." I was disgusted with myself about my actions.

"Riya, tell me clearly what is the matter." Seeing him, it seemed that my words were going over his head. I do not know whether he will talk to me after knowing my truth or not, but at this time I had to reduce the burden of my heart by telling the matter buried in my heart to him or the other.

"Rachit cheated on me, because of that I ruined my 7 year old relationship and now that I am pregnant, I meant was pregnant then...," the grief of losing my child is eating me inside .

"Riya, what did Rachit do," his voice suddenly filled with anger.

"So he refused to accept me and my child. He accused me that this child belonged to someone else, I was with him only to fulfill my physical desires." Repeating the words he had said was giving me even more trouble.

"Rachit's thinking always used to be lousy to me, but he would turn out to be a fallen person to such an extent, I had never even dreamed of."Ankur closed his fist angrily and said, "I will not leave him, he will definitely get punishment for his actions." He is becoming uncontrollable in anger.

Looking at his eyes, at this time it seemed that blood had come down in them.

"No, Ankur, there is no use in doing anything now, he is going to marry someone else soon. And anyway, now that my child is no longer in this world, then I myself do not even want to see the face of such a bad person like Rachit."

"But he must be punished for what he did to you." I am glad that despite knowing my truth, he did not hate me but understood my pain.

"But I don't want to take any revenge on Rachit. Ankur, please promise me you will never tell Rachit anything about this." I said extending my hand towards him.

"Riya, how can you still love rachit?"

"No, I don't love him, or probably never used to. I just..," how can I explain to Ankur that he will definitely get punishment for his mistake one day like I am getting.

"I'm just.., what Riya?" He was trembling with anger after listening to me.

"Ankur, there is a lot of power in karma, just like I am getting punished for my mistakes, he will definitely get the punishment for his actions, and I have full faith that at that time he will have nothing but remorse like me."

"Riya, how are you so confident about this." Ankur asked, expressing disbelief in my words.

"As you sow, so you reap. People have heard the saying, I have seen this proverb coming true in my life."

"Riya, if you believe so, then I leave Rachit to his condition on your request, but I will pray to God that he should get the punishment for his actions as soon as possible." I agreed to his words by shaking my neck.

"Now you rest, I come after seeing the rest of the patients." He said while going towards the door of my room.

I was about to close my eyes and shed tears again about my mistakes when Ankur looked at me and said, "Riya, the person who brought you here after the accident is waiting for a long time to come to your senses. He was insisting on meeting you again and again, if you have permission, should I send him inside."

"OK," I shook my head. My eyes were fixed on the door of my room. I was curious to know who saved me after all. Although now I have no special desire to live, but still I wanted to thank that person for saving my life. But after seeing the face of the person who saved my life, it seemed to me that my voice had been lost somewhere.

"Riya, are you fine now?" Hearing Harsh's worried voice, I could not understand whether I was dreaming or whether Harsh was really standing in front of me.