Was it forbidden to drive a car with a speed of more than a hundred kilometers per hour? Yes, some would say, considering they have all the love they could give to themselves. But to the raven guy beside her, Y/n could only imagine some things he might say. "I don't give a fuck. Not your car, not your road, probably gonna be your death— yes—but again, not your car."
The raindrops continued dribbling down the ground as much as the tears did across Y/n's blossoming red face. What a child she was, wailing and longing for something that costed her everything in the first place.
"What?" Sunghoon asked frantically. "Do you need some tucking in? Do you want me to sing you a lullaby? What?"
Y/n could only hold back by covering her mouth harder, with her head hung low. It was only then Hoon decided to slower down the pace, gradually relaxing his grip on the steering wheel.
"You've been crying the whole night. Oh, what else would you be doing besides whinging here and there?" He asked once again. Y/n's silence was taunting, he could tell. Perhaps it was alright to be strangely stupid when a person is at their lowest point, or just had a lot of shots before being fetched by a 'very concerned' friend of hers.
"That may not be the lowest point in your life, yet." He mouthed once again. Each word seemed like a large shadow casted to overwhelm the littlest light behind Y/n's eyes.
"You will never understand, raven guy. You aren't a failure, not a creep deciding whether or not he should keep himself alive." She finally replied.
"I bet." He hissed, glancing fiercely as he waited for her expression to turn sour. "You do the wrongs and run away and think that you've lost and you're better off dead. What crimes did you even do, anyway?"
"I don't know!" Y/n raised her voice, allowing herself to be more upset this time. "You wouldn't even understand because you dislike me!'
"Ah, yes." He sighed in a way that sounded like he was right about thinking something. "Without your stupid bangs, I wouldn't."
"That is why I never wanted to fall for you in the first place!" Y/n fired back, clenching her fists. She felt funny. But she knew part of her had to say that drunk. She would never have the chance to say it while she was sober. But whatever it was, she was childlike tonight.
She suddenly fell silent until the moment she regained the calmness in her tone. "I like you, Hoon. Really, I do. But you are always so mean to me."
"I wanted to make you like me better. I could never think of any way for you to at least be a little nice to me. I wanted to be someone you always brag about to your friends. I don't even know why. It's stupid. But I like you, Hoon. Even from the first time you picked me up when I was drunk. I know you'd always do that. But I can't be so sure. Maybe this is just the drinks kicking in. I don't fucking know anymore."
Hoon fixed his gaze on the road, exhaling audibly. "Y/n..."
"I know, it wouldn't take so long until this... This pent-up bullshit I have for you finally escapes from my mouth and—
"You're truly a kiddiewink, y/n."
"Stop talking if you don't have anything nice to say, raven-haired dude—"
"Don't say it." He interrupted, hating to be referred to as a 'raven-haired dude' everytime y/n was drunk. "Don't fucking say it. I have a name. It's Sunghoon. Your enemy. Sunghoon."
So, he had a name. Y/n thought to herself.
"Are you always this bitter, Sunghoon? Does it give you enough pleasure to—to ... It doesn't matter." Y/n could only grimace, wiping the tears crossing her nose with the back of her hand.
Sunghoon let out a faint laugh before stopping the car on the side of the road, overlooking the woods.
He had no time to hesitate so he cupped her cheeks and went for her lips as if it was never even enough to hold her close, to tell her he was sorry for always making her cry, to tell her he wasn't really a good person, to make her feel that however flawed, however fucked-up they can be with each other, he still wanted her. And he would like to think it's still not too late to want her, too. His kiss was innocent and rough, though.
Y/n slowly let go, getting a hold of his wrists. "I still might be drunk."
Hoon let out a small grin, then caressing her cheek with his thumb. "I love you, y/n. And I'll make sure you know that when you're sober."
---
Author-nim is graduating tomorrow ! ! ! Will be going to college na ! ! !
What a good day without General Physics, General Chemistry, and Practical Research ^_^
Sorry I had to take my time with this, but, With Honors pa author niyo mga bui! (hindi ko na po na clutch Yung 95, pero oks naman) Even bagged the Quill Awards (Been so lucky to be able to write in the editorial section) (Asst. Editor-in-chief)
I hate that everything is moving surprisingly slow but awkwardly fast, and I still feel like I have so little time :<
But my inner demons love the risk and so, they tricked me into choosing civil engineering:>> (guys don't blame the inner demons, i chose the suffering. the credit is all mine)
I hate that I have to leave my friends, my family, my humble depression room, well pretty much all the life I have here right now to get to college :<<
But I understand that we only march forward. Author-nim has to grow at whatever rate. She has to.
I hope I'd make it out alive ^ ^
Anyways,
ओह! यह छवि हमारे सामग्री दिशानिर्देशों का पालन नहीं करती है। प्रकाशन जारी रखने के लिए, कृपया इसे हटा दें या कोई भिन्न छवि अपलोड करें।
My friend edited this. Thought I could post it here because I'm also a delusion enjoyer ^_^ (as a heeseung girlie, i really cannot 😭)
Kunyare soft launch hihihi Pls wag niyo ko patayen 😭
(Photo of Heeseung not mine, credits to the rightful owner!)
