.Eyes Of Void.

-59-

I didn't wait for my mother's approval to leave, I need to find her.

"You burnt yourself." I was facing her back, Mystery seemed to hear me but kept looking up at the elm in front of her. "You didn't go to a healer you burnt yourself..." I thought the original burn was made by a healer because the wound was to great for bandages but seeing what she did in the fighting ring proved to me she did all of that to herself.

"Don't talk with guilt Highness, it was my choice take care of it in this way." I saw her bring a hand to her face before clasping them behind her back.

"It must have hurt."

"Not more then why I got it.... But I deserve it."

"You don't Mystery! I should have never done such horrible thing!" like many times in the last two days tears came to my eyes.

"I do deserve it if you seeing that didn't make you think that could be fake, to you I am someone that could do this without remorse and for that I deserve this Highness." I am so sorry Mystery, you don't deserve to doubt your loyalty because of me.

"Shut up!!" I screamed, voice breaking, I hate that word. "Shut up, shut up, shut up!! I'm Audrey!! I-I didn't mean it! I'm Audrey!.... I'm Audrey....." I said, pleading for her to just call me that as I looked at her, finally face to face despite the distance still there.

She simply sighed and I thought she was not going to do as I asked.

"Right.... Audrey, that is your name." She sounded so unsure if she should say it.

"I wish I could all take it back! Everything! You deserve nothing off what I did!" Closing my eyes pushed the tears over, gods I am the worst.

"I deserve it if you think I could do something like that."I felt her hand brush against my face and when I looked at her I saw that she truly believed her own words.

"You don't!!" The last semblance of control leaving me as I kept yelling at her, she can't be thinking like that. "I am so paranoid.... So scared of ending up without you.... I can't spend a day without thinking about what would happen if you weren't mine it led to this...."

"I reassured you many times I'd stay with you." True she did.... She did....

"I know but all the whispers when they think I won't hear them.... All the doubt the servants have that we'll last... All the uneasiness knowing you might die so I can live.... And I.... I didn't even think to look into it when I saw that, all their doubts and my fears suddenly confirmed in front of my eyes." I explained myself but instead of making me feel better by admitting the truth I was feeling like I was digging my own grave in guilt.

"You thought I betrayed you.... You thought I betrayed you and wanted me away from you, you hated me."

"I never did!"I wanted to hug her, to hold her, do something but I just couldn't. I just couldn't bring myself to touch her in anyway, the knowledge that last time I did hurt her with my clouded judgement and I felt like I might accidentally cause more pain again. "The second I struck you I regretted it, wanting to take it all back but the hurt I was feeling was master of my decisions...... Y-you can have pay back." I said, eye for an eye and all is fixed right?

I flinched as she lifted her arm, closing my eyes, I deserve this, I do, but I can't help but be scared as I knew of her powers, w-will she burn me too? Wi--I flinched again when her hand touched the top of my head but nothing came of it.

I opened my eyes as she pressed her forehead against mine.... Why.... Get your pay back... Stop being so nice.... Just stop.... I don't deserve it....

"Audrey you made me feel many things, as good as bad as they get but I'd never, ever, strike you for whatever reason I could have to want to do that but I'd never even think of doing that... I live for you in many way and to hurt you isn't one of those reasons, not physically nor emotionally."

"How can you be so sweet after all this?...." I asked, just unable to wrap my head around the whole thing.... Why is she?....

"Because you're worth the pain, any and all type."

"I'm not, I am not, all I do is hurt you.... Maybe we are better apart aren't we?"

"In that case." I saw her pull out her dagger and tensed, now she'll have her reve-- "Kill me." I froze, looking at the dagger held with the handle towards me.

"What?! Mystery have you lost your mind?!" My voice broke in desperation at her words.

"If you are not willing to have me as yours then kill me, no matter what you put me through you are worth it to me.... You made a mistake, we all make mistakes but this one is fixable..... Once you asked of me what I was feeling, here's the answer, despite what happened I love you. I. Love. You... And if you don't want me then kill me."

"Mystery I can't kill you!" My emotions were hard to keep inside, panic and guilt mixing, wanting to throw that dagger far from me.

"Do it!!" Mystery yelled at me, I froze, not knowing what to do or say.  "Do it!!" She shoved the dagger towards my hands again but I took a step back. "Before you showed up I was no one, another mage like the rest, stuck in her duties she didn't like but accepted as her life as she knew nothing would change.... But it did change, you showed me a part of me I didn't even know about.... You give me a reason to want this life to the fullest, you gave me a reason.... I never blamed you, I never was mad at you, I never stopped loving you, I never thought of giving up on you for a mistake you made while in sever emotional distress from mine look alike.... So if you are not willing to accept that I still don't want to leave you behind then kill me Audrey. Kill me! End my life as without you in it it isn't worth shit!"

"How can you not blame me even for a second?...." I breathed out, it felt so hard to breathe, like I was drowning on something.

"Because it's human to feel, it's human to make mistakes, it's human to learn from them and grow.... Accept me as you are and as I am or kill me because without you I'll die anyway."

"Mystery...." I looked at the blade before I shook my head. "I can't, and I don't think I will for a long time, understand how you don't blame me like you should.... But I can't kill you or I would have to follow to be with you." I said truthfully.

"Water under the bridge?" She asked but it felt like she had stabbed me with the damned dagger, no, that feels so wrong to say.

"No this can't be forgotten, ever. I did something bad and it will stare back at me every time I look at you but if you do mean what you sai--" "I do mean every last bit of it Audrey. I don't blame anything on you and want to remain by your side until death tears us apart."

"--I think I could learn to forgive myself too but it will be hard." I told her.

"I know and I will be here with you, not letting you go alone."

"So put the dagger away, we won't need it." I said, relaxing finally when she sheathed it.

"Right." I felt her hand on my face, I wanted to pull and away and yet I leaned into it. "And this is to prove I mean my words." I was surprised by the small kiss I get, so sweet.... Just why?

"You are way to nice for your own good." I stepped closer and leaned my head on her shoulder, I just can't wrap my head around it.

"I know Audrey, I know." I felt her hand pass through my hair. "A brick to the tower."

"What?" That saying doesn't exist.

"Since water under the bridge is not a good metaphor for you I came up with one, a brick to the tower, a brick on which we can build on and it will help us get higher with its strength and the strength of many other bricks, good and bad alike."

"Mmm I prefer it to the other." I admitted since it meant the mistake wouldn't be erased and forgotten but something we can look back and avoid.

"I thought you would." She kissed my head and hugged me, I shakily hugged back, you are too nice for your own good Mystery.

Too nice...

...

Thank you.