Why Wattpad Drives Me Crazy | ✔️

79| An Assortment of Rants

Firstly, guys, can I just tell you to watch this video; it's my friend's (and his friend) version of "Shake It Off" by Taylor Swift and I just think it's ABSOLUTELY PHENOMENAL. Like seriously, you need to watch it.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=1Wlds8njkk8&feature=youtu.be

Vote and comment on it if you can!!! Like its soooo good dammit why do they only have 500 views

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So because my thoughts have been all over the place I've been gathering topics to rant about but they've never really formulated into a whole rant each, so I'm going to scatter them all on this page.

Hope you like them!
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1. Rant books

So yea I'm going to rant about rant books because I SWEAR THAT'S ALL IM SEEING ON WATTPAD THESE DAYS HOLY SHIT PLEASE TELL ME I AINT THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS NOTICED

Like this is an average Wattpadder's works now:

- A Fan Fiction novel
- "My Random Thoughts" book
- "Random facts" book
- A Rant Book

Not that I'm saying that we shouldn't write rant books because lol it's so much fun complaining but I'm just saying, just saying, they're the "in" thing now hahaha

Like they're literally everywhere 👍

Yes. I'm one of those bitches who hate on things that become mainstream.

#TooMainstream
#HypocrisyAtItsFinest

2.These Government Stories

I thought I'd already ranted about this but re-reading this rant book again I actually haven't. Or maybe I have. Idk, I got bored

So basically there's quite a number of stories where the author tries to go all Secret Service and Mafia shit and sometimes it's sooooo bad to read because they don't understand shit about how it works

I'm so sure I already told you of this story I'd read where a nine-year-old girl wanted to join the mafia because she was in love with a ten-year-old boy who was already in it

Like guys pls pls lol

3. The word "basically"

It's like people can't go a sentence without inserting *hehe* the word "basically" into it

Me included, mind you

Like you know things are thick when authors start their book in this way:

"So basically..."

Like I use that word (unconsciously) at least four times in all my essays and my hot RS teacher keeps circling it then I feel embarrassed because he's so hot

Like srsly guys he's such a sexy beast can I list his sexiness

1. He's BRITISH. So the accent 😲😲😲😲😲😲😲😲
2. He's into basketball. 😲😲😲
3. He has blue eyes like omg when he looks at you 😲😲😲😲😲
4. He's tall😲😲😲😲
5. He's young😵😲😲😲😲
6. He's funny and HE CAN PROPER PRONOUNCE MY NAME MKAYYYY

Not being racist or anything but white people find it hard to pronounce my name but tbh it's not that hard I mean you fucking learnt to pronounce Tchaikovsky so why can't you pronounce my name dammit

But he? He's white. And he can pronounce it. Cheers m8 👌

....aaannnnddd he has a girlfriend. In Canada.

(meh, I liked Theo James better anyway)

4. The Perfect Guys don't exist

We need to stop making "perfect guys" in our stories I mean honestly we as writers are so annoying because we'll make the female protagonist have so many flaws like geekiness to the point of anti-socialness, low self esteem, etc but the guys? They're always so perrrrfff I mean being a "bad boy" is the epitomy of perfection, according to wattpad

But tbh Zayn Malik's long hair is the epitomy of perfection 😲😲😲😲😍😍😍

#NotADirectioner

5. MuffinsandUnicorn's rant

She messaged me with the funniest rant ever:

So there's a book and you're really enthusiastic about it based on the description. You open the first chapter and it says something like, "hi, I'm *insert author name here*. So, I'm going to use a lot of OCs from my other nook and you won't understand if you haven't read it, it's called..."

And I'm Ike, "No, I wanted to read this book. If i liked it, I would have checked out your other works. But I don't even know if I'll like it yet and you're trying to make me read your other work."

Seriously, if you've posted like twenty chapters you can say something about your other the other works in your author's note...if you love your OCs, reuse them...

but don't give me this "YOU HAVE TO READ THIS BOOK ON THE HISTORY AND THIS OTHER ONE ON THEIR PERSONALITY FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND THIS ONE" bullshit.

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(6.) When people tell me "Happy Holidays"

Guys, I celebrate Christmas.
So Merry Christmas. Not "happy holidays".

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL!!! (In advance!)

(I'll be lost in all my hundreds of relatives at an overnight Christmas Eve dinner lol who else has to have those huge-ass family gatherings where the older relatives basically just disapprove of all your inappropriate clothing?)

How will y'all be spending your Christmas? Do you have any crazy-ass Christmas stories to share? If so, don't hesitate to comment them x

I got a belly piercing last weeeeeekkkkkkk

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So I'm thinking of giving you guys a mini-present because I'm so grateful for y'all...💙
That profile picture tho 😂