Why Wattpad Drives Me Crazy | ✔️

54| Speech Mark Blues

Hi

How is everybody doing?

I'm great, thanks for asking.

(I know, you didn't ask).

::

So I'm ranting about punctuation again, I know. But it's either because:
(a) I've ran out of things to rant about
(b) I've become an overly positive person these days (and thus have nothing to complain about because we are all special!)
Or
(c) It pisses me off to the point that screw my promise, these bitches need to go down!

Which reason do you think it is?

I don't know, but let's get on with this mofo!

::

I can't really say that I hate speech marks because duh, we need that shit to indicate speech

But there are some authors on here that don't fucking know how to use them and I'm like what? We learnt this stuff when we were like six years old okay

(Bet you missed that lesson

Bet you were on a play date, with that boy, eh. You were just using him because he had Ken, wasn't it? You slut.

Now that I think about it, was Barbie'a boyfriend (Ken) a toy for boys or for girls

Because lol maybe they were trying to get boys to play with dolls too

But then again my 10 Barbie dolls needed a boyfriend yea).

I'm afraid of the direction my thoughts take me.

Back on track.

The first thing that pisses me off is when the author forgets to close the quotation, so it seems endless.

I mean even the best of us may forget at one point, so I'm not hating on you or anything, but my brain screams at the sentence like:

"CLOSEEEEE BITCH CLOSEEEE! If you don't, it will keep going on, and on, and on, and on (when me and you party together, I wish this night would last for ever). You just fucking forgot that your character is shy okay, yet here she is talking so much shit (I don't know whether to give her a toilet paper or breath mint). But CLOSEE please I'm dying here, she isn't narrating the story omfg stfu close close the quotation marks my gaaaddd
Sorry, I had to do the song reference and I stole the joke off the Internet.
I'm still going strong. Are you? I'm not going to put in closing quotations. It's got to annoy you too.
FEEL THE BURNNN!
Feel it
Feel it a little longer
I'm deciding on whether I should let you chill in peace again...hmm...okay. Here you go...jokes.

Please tell me it is annoying you too so that I feel like I conveyed my point across well enough

Please

Okay then.

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The second way that many authors misuse speech marks is when they don't understand that EACH NEW SPEAKER HAS A NEW LINE. It's in capital letters so that you absorb that for minute.

*waits a minute.*

It's really annoying to read when they don't realise that. It looks a little bit like:

"I want to Scream, Will, I really want to." "I know, mate?" Will replied. "I want to shout too." "Just let it all out." Britney said. "We're saying oh, we oh, we oh, we oh. Don't you think?" "Oh yea! You are now rocking with us bitches!" Will and Britney shouted simultaneously.

How it should be:

"Oh my gaad," Will suddenly said.

"What?" Britney questioned.

"THAT SHOULD BE A SONG."

"I KNOW RIGHT?"

The second and CORRECT way is much neater and easier to differentiate. Even I got mixed up writing the first one okay, so like just understand that there's a system

All those who don't follow the system will be destroyed

#Divergent

Lol okay. (I loved Guardians of the Galaxy omg)

The third way is the one I'd say drives me the craziest.

Like you can forget to close the quote, you can write it on the same line, but if you do this, I will come at you bruh with a fucking sniper and shoot all your damn flowers because those bitches don't deserve to grow around you

What is this that she hates so much, you ask?

(Lol that's in 2nd person! And I thought I'd never use it).

Well, here it is.

I completely and utterly hate it when the author puts NO punctuation before the closing quotation or speech marks.

LIKE IT FEELS SO EMPTY:

"Hi babe how are you"

"Good good"

"That's good"

"Yassss"

I literally hate that like I can't even deal right now okay, those sentences need comas or full stops or exclamation marks or SOMETHING

please

Just give them the punctuation that they deserve, okay

I can't deal

::

Lol but you know it's a struggle when you have to keep going to McDonald's just for the free wifi omg