Choni New Love

Suicide

Toni's pov

When Cheryl climbed into her car she was quieter than usual. I couldn't help but think Mrs Cooper had denied Cheryl's request.

"How did it go?" I asked.

"It went well she is going to do it." Cheryl stared out of the window and something just didn't feel right.

I drove on for a few miles before I decided to stop. I couldn't take the silent cat ride knowing there was clearly something wrong with Cheryl. I pulled over to the side of the road and Cheryl looked at me confused.

"Why'd you stop?" She asked.

Cheryl's pov

From the moment I walked out of the Cooper's home I couldn't get that day at sweet water river when Archie saved me out of my head. I couldn't explain why maybe it was thinking and talking about a future I didn't think I would have had. If Archie hadn't saved me I wouldn't have any future and I wouldn't have been able to find Jason.

"Cheryl talk to me what's wrong?" Toni asked, I could see the concerning look on her face.

"Its nothing TT I'm fine." I fake smiled.

"Are you having second thoughts?"

"What? NO, NO of course not. Its just..." I reassured her.

"Just what?" Toni asked.

I took a moment to gather my thoughts before answering.

"It's strange having Jason back. I'm happy he is its just... his death or what was made to look like his death changed my life and me completely."

"I understand it changed you Cheryl but change isn't always a bad thing." Toni tried to reassure.

"I tried to kill myself TT and I have never spoken to anyone about it." I explained.

"Cheryl you know I am always here for you to speak to about anything." Toni took hand in hers.

We sat in silence as minutes passed. My mind kept thinking of what to say but nothing seemed right. No words came that could explain why I tried to kill myself. After a few more minutes of silence I finally broke it.

"When they found what was meant to be Jason's body it felt like I was alone in the world. He was the only person who cared about me or protected me and I tried to be strong by putting up walls and focusing on who killed him that emotions just went numb. Then we found out who done it and my haneous father hung himself. I didn't want to live anymore knowing my own father had to ability to kill my brother and go on and act like nothing happened. My mother made me feel even more alone, hated and loveless. She pretty much told me id be better off killing myself and my body was just too drained. I couldn't take anymore, it was too much. When I was at sweet water river all I wanted was to be with Jason. I put on a front for so long when really I felt unloveable and worthless, even my own mother didnt want me. Then Archie, Betty, Jughead and Veronica were there trying to stop me and for a moment before I went under I felt like someone actually cared about me. I mean Archie broke his hand saving me." My voice broke and I couldn't carry on.