Deathly Kisses

42. "Always"

Chp42. "Always"





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Dedicated to - PrincessMahone bc fave duh??

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I ran a hand through my hair slightly, trying to get any tangles out. It was the first time I had actually wore my hair fully out and not into my usual half ponytail and curls. I felt... Different. It wasn't that I didn't like it, well maybe it was. But I was so used to me. I didn't really do change very well, it was all too much for me. However it didn't hurt to try new things. It was only six in the afternoon on a hot summer day. And being in my room all day wasn't helping.


It's been a couple of weeks since I officially graduated. And truthfully I don't know what to say or feel. Not only was it a new begging in living my own life with making my own decisions but it was also the fact that moving away from my comfort zone was affecting me much. It was indeed terrifying.


By now I should have been in Miami. Mom had somehow arranged for me to stay with a cousin that I did not know I had living there; considering how small of a family we are. For a little while I would be there with her until I find myself a decent job, get my own place and settle in. Mom had also mentioned how she was in her middle twenties, so we would get along just fine. It was a lot of work, and just thinking about all of that really made me worry. More than I probably should. I am almost nineteen, and here I am stressing out over everything. 


Despite all of the plans of moving to Miami right at the start of summer I had decided to instead change that. I know that it was last minute but I just couldn't leave. And most certainly abandon mom just like that. She has already assured me many times that she'll be fine. And I know she will be, it is just the sad moment of leaving the woman who raised me. Either way it had to be done sooner or later.


"I really like your hair like that." Austin says. I see him through the mirror as I sit in front of it and continue to run a hand through my hair. He is laying in my bed playing with one of my stuffed animals and throwing it back and forth to keep himself entertained. I really do question him sometimes.


I don't respond though, but raise an eyebrow instead. He gives me a nod and tosses the stuffed animal once again. "Whatever you do with your hair, you still look beautiful."


There he goes again. Doing that same thing he always does. Using his charm to win me, and there it goes again. Succeeding every single damn time. Part of me really wants to say that I had decided to stay here a little longer just to fully say my goodbyes to the town I grew up living in. But I knew far too well those are lies. As much as I hated to admit it to myself, I knew that Austin was one of the main reasons to influence my decision to stay a little longer than I had planned. But it was hard to say no to him, especially the way things had become recently.


"You're just saying that." I waved him off with my hand, pretending I don't care to his statement. Even though, I am currently trying to remain calm because of it.


"No I'm not," he argues back, sitting up from the bed. "I am being serious. I could sit here all day and look at you, I wouldn't mind." Austin speaks slowly and right away I feel my stomach do uncontrollable flips and turns so unexpectedly. It was the simple things he would say that would drive me almost insane just to be able to hear them again coming from his mouth. To hear his voice compliment me over and over again; I would never get tired.


I groan a little loudly. Licking my lips I turn away from the mirror and to face the bed where Austin is. He's not holding the stuffed animal anymore, instead he is just sitting there doing nothing but watching me. The way his eyes seem to scan me is something that I absolutely adore. I don't know why really. In fact, I don't know exactly just how he makes me feel. But I know that I enjoy it, a lot. It was unexplainable and so, so different. Overall it was simply him that would make it hard for me to breath when he's around. Every little moment, every little look, every little touch- it was deathly. I was weak and he knew it.


"Stop that." I say crossing my arms against my chest. I huffed and stared back at Austin. A nice smirk plastered on his face. He knew what he was doing. The real question here is, when doesn't he? He has everything always figured out. And till this day, I am not sure to whether if that's a good thing or a bad thing.


Austin catches me off guard when he chuckles to himself. "Stop what?" He questions, trying his best to catch himself a breath. "I'm not even doing anything Mia."


"Stop looking at me like that and stop giving me all these compliments all the time. It's driving me crazy!"


Austin yet again throws his head back in laughter. Bringing his gaze up to me, he leaned against the headboard of the bed smoothly. "Don't pretend like you don't like it. You love it."


"No." Yes.


The main thing I hated was showing weakness. I was known for that, and I hated it. People knew my weaknesses, always knew. And I couldn't do anything about it. It wasn't in my intention. I didn't want Austin to know that I in fact do love how recently, he stops at nothing just to make me smile. Or so he says. I've been out with Austin a few times. I pause at the thought of that. Now that I think about it, it's even more than a few times, endless actually. I couldn't help it though. I enjoyed him. Spending time that is. Okay, maybe even him. I had it bad.


Despite him being an asshole most of the time, he wasn't all bad. At least I had come to realization with that. Things seemed different, in my perspective. And it wasn't like we would plan to hang out, it just sort of happened. I would get a random text at three in the morning from Austin telling me he's picking me up or to meet him somewhere. It was weird having his number, it was even awkward when he took my phone and added his number to my contacts like it was nothing. Texting Austin was awkward, he wasn't exactly the conversation type. So our texts concluded of one word answers or instructions on where to meet. Clearly I am still lost on to why I obeyed and continued to see him. But like I had said before, it felt different.


"Why do you always have to lie?" He asks. "Why can't you just admit to things? It's written all over your face when you lie. Even though it's a cute look on you, you really are a bad liar babe."


"-we gotta work on that." Austin says.


"Well maybe I'll become better of a liar once you become less of an asshole." I reply back bluntly.


"Ouch." He says calmly, shaking it off.


"Don't pretend you're hurt, I insult you all the time!" I say. And it was true, I insulted Austin quite a lot actually. But it wasn't like he took it offensively. At times he would. It was more of a back and forth kind of thing. He would be a jerk and I'd make sure I let him know that.


He agrees with a sudden chuckle. A smile spreads across my face as I see he knows it's nothing but the truth. "And yet, I don't know why I'm not used to it." He admits truthfully. I quietly giggle to myself.


Ignoring him once again, I turn myself around and focus on the mirror. Things weren't as they used to be when Austin was around. It was always panic being with him. I didn't know just how to act or what to say. Though through time I had worked on fixing that. Certainly he noticed I was more open with him, he even questioned me about it. I simply said it was nothing and changed the subject. However I am positive Austin knew that I was getting comfortable with him. Maybe even far too comfortable that is. But I knew he probably was too, or at least that's what it seemed to be. He wasn't like before, cold and heartless. At least that's what it seemed nowadays. He actually even joked once in a while, here and there. But the main thing there was no denying in was that he was indeed a flirt. But I wasn't complaining, at least not yet.


"I would love to see you in something different." Austin's sudden outburst had caught me off guard. And right away I took it offensive. What now? Was I not good enough for him or something?


"What did you say?" I focused all my attention on him, waiting for nothing else but his reply.


"What?" He questioned bluntly as if it were nothing. "Why are you acting that way?"


"Acting what way?" I challenged.


He rolled his eyes annoyed. "That!" He gestured his hand towards me.


"I am not acting like anything."


"Yes you are."


Standing up from my seat, I felt the blood boil inside me. I wasn't in no mood for a fight. But somehow what he had said to me made me think that he didn't like me for me. I was a girl, how do you expect me not to get offended right away? A guy telling you he'd rather see you wear something different is pretty offensive. I was no such thing as promiscuous. But knowing Austin those were the only type of girls he was used to. And I was going to make sure he knows I wasn't one of those.


"Entertain me Austin." I snapped. "Tell me exactly just how I am acting." Pulling my hear behind my ears, still standing I managed to keep my glare on him.


"Well for starters you're being a bitch." He noted. I scoffed. Of course he would say that.


"-And you're giving me an attitude that is certainly not necessary." He added.


I took a deep breath in, still clearly pissed off. "Only because you are saying things that are making me act this way."


He shook his head and threw the stuffed animal that was on his hands on to the floor. I watched as he did. "What things?" He questioned slowly his voice rising, a vein in his necked popped as he did so. "All I said was that I would love to see you in something different."


"Exactly!" I stated my point.


Austin furrowed his eyebrows together in confusion as his eyes were still laid upon me. He laughed sarcastically. "Seriously Mia? Seriously?" He said and I nodded. Brining his hand he slowly ran it through his hair.


"Please explain to me what is happening here because clearly I am lost." Austin breathed out.


"Don't ask so stupid now. You're basically asking me to change for you, as if I'm not worthy of you." I bark.


"What?" He almost laughs. This isn't the time for laughter. I was getting so sick and tired of Austin not owning up to the things he does. Yeah he may make my heart flutter, but he was also capable of making me feel like complete crap. That was the power of Austin Mahone for you...


"I did not ask you to change at all!" He yelled. "When did you even hear those words come out of my mouth? Jesus Mia." He groaned. "Stop putting words into my mouth that I clearly did not say."


"Technically you did."


"Technically I didn't say shit."


"Well then what did you mean by 'something different.'" I mocked his words.


"I just meant something different." He shrugged. "Be able to see you a little more-"


"Slutty?" I finished. Austin didn't have a chance to finish his sentence, cause I had already done that for him.


Austin shakes his head. "No I did not mean 'slutty'."


He's simply just lying now. He knows exactly what he meant. I was calming down a little, but just the thought of him seeing m that way, did make a rush go trough my body. God, I can't believe I basically threw myself at him. What the hell was I thinking? Clearly I wasn't. But I was for once surprised Austin was using his head and did the right decision. Otherwise I would have gave something to him that I would never be able to get back.


"Yes you did." I fought Austin back. He knew exactly that he did.


He gives in just like I had thought he would. "Okay fine. I did." He admits. "But can you blame me? I am a guy with hormones. What do you expect?"


He was right after all. Knowing Austin he wouldn't really change his way. Matter of fact, I don't think any guy would. But I just can't stand thinking of Austin seeing me as just another girl. I wasn't like that. I was a fool for classic romance. I couldn't help it. I liked walks on the beach, unexpected cute surprises. I can go on forever honestly. But just thinking about how some girls go out to parties and clubs and go home with a different guy every night just makes me cringe. I would never or will ever do that.


"Well let me be clear Austin. I'm going to tell you this once and it better stick with you. I am nothing like those girls you take home." I said. "I have respect for myself." I saw how he raised an eyebrow at me. My cheeks flushed with embarrassment once he did that, both of us knew he was referring to that night a few weeks by. I shook it off and continued.


"My point is, don't treat me like I'm some girl you've met at the streets and can just toy with."

"Is that what you think I do? Just play around with every girl that I see like it's my hobby?" He questioned, his face had fury written all over it.

"Isn't it? It's what you're known for." I remark. I'll admit that it felt good to finally have at least something against me. But soon after I had said it I couldn't help but feel so guilty.

The look on Austin's face was priceless. I would love to replay this moment over just to see his face again the way it was just now. He was amused that was for sure. After a while of silence, Austin finally spoke. "You're right," he said. "For your information, that is not what I do. You just don't understand, no one does." He shook his head, and changed the subject quickly. "And lastly, I apologize if my chosen words offended you. I wasn't thinking." He admits. 

It was weird having Austin apologize to me, he was doing it often though. I liked it. I nodded in a way to accept his apology. He continued to only stare at me across my room, I did the same. I could feel the tension build up by the second. Just ask for it Austin. Just ask.


"Did I ever tell you how hot you look when you're angry? Because if I didn't let me tell you know that you're making so many dirty thoughts run through my mind."


"Austin!" I couldn't help but smile. And we were right back to where it starts. Like I had mentioned so many times, this was a daily routine for Austin and I. "You really need to start clearing your mind and go read the bible." I said jokingly.


"You talk to much babe, just get over here and kiss me before I do so myself."


"Then why don't you?"


It took not even a second for Austin to basically run across my room and over to me. Connecting his lips with mine, his hand placed itself on my waist as his other hand ran slowly through my arms. I pushed myself onto him even closer than before. Austin's moan that had just been heard by my ears drove me wild. Mia stop. I warned myself, but I couldn't. He was just so addicting. However before there was even a chance to make the kiss even much ether than it already was, I heard a car door slam. Right away, I knew it was mom.


"Austin my mom is here, you have to leave." I said once I parted myself from him. He only rolled his eyes and then pouted like a little kid.


"Just a little more time. She won't find out." He whispered in my ear, sending shivers through my body.


"No!" I said panicking. "Now." He obeyed this time. Taking his jacket from my bed, he quickly threw it on and gave me a smirk before he disappeared from my room leaving from the window. Just like the same way he had came in. Mom couldn't find out, that's all I knew I had to make sure of.


After taking a hot shower and jumping into bed, as I watched yet again another episode of Friends on Netflix; I closed my laptop. Just when I was ready to turn off my light and call it a day, I had received a text. It wasn't from Macy, it wasn't from Drew. But I knew who it was from. Just like I was expecting; Austin.


"Meet again tomorrow?" the text read.


I didn't feel like starting a whole conversation with him. I was already tired as if that wasn't enough. So I simply replied with one word that would mean all.


"Always." I replied.

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OMG OMG OMG!!! Megan the author of Sparks Fly reads DK! I am officially done with life. Buy me some pizza and come to my funeral, I lived a happy life.


Also, the new cover of DK is also made by her so thank you Megan so much!! I love you. And a new video for Deathly Kisses is up on the channel it is about Cora(:

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