TW: Suicide, Eating Disorder, Depression.
Max POV:
I walked over to Danna before he could come closer.
Danna-"Calm down, you guys need to act normal around each other."
Max-"Whens Mickey coming?"
Danna-"He's on his way."
Colby-"Why do you need Mickey."
Max-"To calm me down."
Colby-"You'll be fine. Don't ignore him, you guys need to act like everything is fine."
Max-"How?"
Josh-"Max you ready to film again?"
Max-"Yeah!"
I walked outside and sat again.
Josh-"Just let everything out about your journey."
Max-"Okay."
Josh-"You can talk whenever."
Max-"When I moved to LA, I never thought it would effect me this much. At first it was great, but then like 2 days in I got in a relationship, "
Josh-"Can you say who that person is?"
Max-"Yeah it was with Tyler."
Josh-"Okay carry on."
Max-"I didn't really know what expect from that relationship. But it definitely wasn't his fault for me having depression or me being suicidal. But after awhile, I just started not feeling the same. I would get really mad and upset about certain things, which would cause me to run away. Which really sent all my friends into panic mode, I didn't answer any texts or calls."
Josh-"I don't know if you would wanna say this, but do you remember the first time you were about to commit suicide?"
Max-"Yeah, I had gotten really upset about something, I drove to Suicide Bridge, and was about to jump off a 100 foot bridge. But my friends arrived just in time."
Josh-"You think if they showed up a couple seconds late, would you still be here?"
Max-"No, I would be dead."
Josh-"Jeez."
Max-"Yeah. But after that I suffered from an eating disorder, I hated how I looked. I've always struggled with loving myself properly. And with depression, I really just always tore myself up, and when you have big platform, there's always hate."
Josh-"How do you feel when people say your not pretty?"
Max-"I try not to let it get too me, but recently it really got to me."
Josh-"Why?"
Max-"I saw this tik tok, about pretty girls, and I was in that list with extremely beautiful women. I know Emma chamberlain talked about the same thing before. But you know I was curios about what the comments had to say, so I read thru them, and a lot of people were saying, 'Max isn't pretty' 'Why did you put Max in this list' 'All she ever does is cause drama' 'Shes a hoe' 'All she ever does is sleep around with different men' and they were really going off on me. Which caused me think and be like, Am I really ugly? Does it look like I sleep with every guy? I was just telling myself constantly, your pretty, you can do this. So I would've give up again."
Josh-"Where their any comments about you being a teen mom?"
Max-"Yeah there was a few. But I love my kids, I would do anything in the world for them, but it was hard to see people taking bad about my kids too."
Josh-"They were talking bad about your kids too?"
Max-"Yeah."
Josh-"Is that why you don't post them as much?"
Max-"No, I like to keep my kids off social media. I don't want them going thru what I did. I do post them here and there but I don't have them on my story constantly."
Josh-"Thats good your trying to have them off social
Media."
Max-"Yeah."
Josh-"Lets take a 5 minute break, get some water, go to the bathroom."
Max-"Okay."
I got up and Mickey was there. He ran up to me and I was so happy to see him.
Danna-"How was that?"
Max-"Good."
Colby-"You okay?"
Max-"Yeah why?"
Colby-"We know how you get when you talk about these certain things."
Max-"O no I'm fine."
Josh-"Hey Max is it okay if we took the kids to the park? We just wanna get some shots of them playing."
Max-"Yeah go ahead!"
Josh-"The park is just across the street so it'll take 10 minutes top."
Max-"Yeah! Danna go with them."
She grabbed Kian and Mason, she took Mickey with her.
Max-"Where are Mikey and Ty?"
Colby-"They Are getting interviewed."
Max-"O okay."
I went on my phone and then I got called to start the interview again. I sat down and I talked more about my depression and eating disorder.
Couple hours later...
Josh-"Whats one of your biggest accomplishments?"
Max-"Having my sons."
Josh-"You think you and Tyler will ever get back together?"
Max-"Um I don't know."
Josh-"Do you still love him..?"
Max-"Yeah I love him, he's my ride or die, he's an amazing father to my kids. I love him a lot."
Josh-"Then why aren't you guys together?"
I shrugged my shoulders and started laughing.
Josh-"Whats funny?"
Max-"I don't know,"
Josh-"Do you want to get back together with him?"
Max-"Um maybe, but you know things change."
Josh-"Yeah I understand, anything big coming in the future?"
Max-"There was something really big coming in the next 6 or 7 months, but that got cancelled. But I'm dropping an album soon. So yeah."
Josh-"Thats good to hear! But I think we are done!"
Max-"Really?"
Josh-"Yeah!"
Max-"Okay!"
Josh-"We are gonna interview Colby one more time."
Max-"Okay."
I got up and Tyler had Kian. I went on my phone and Mikey came up to me.
Mikey-"How was it?"
Max-"It wasn't bad."
Mikey-"Can I talk to you privately real quick?."
Max-"Is it abo-?"
Mikey-"No but yes."
Max-"Okay..."
We walked outside in the front yard.
Mikey-"Are you mad at me?"
Max-"No! I'm not, you didn't do anything."
Mikey-"O I thought you would hate me."
Max-"No I love you more right now. Your completely fine tho."
Mikey-"Okay thats all I wanted to ask."
Max-"Okay."
We went inside and waited for Colby to be done. After that we were told we could leave, we said goodbye to everyone and went back to the house.