She Wasn't You

Chapter 3

My heart almost stopped. "Katie? You mean MY Katie?"

Although I was now married but between Danny and I, you had always been referred to as my Katie. From that very first day I laid my eyes on you; to this day today, just over 22 years and 8,079 days later (who's counting anyway?)

You will always be my Katie.

"Yes, YOUR Katie, over there by the bar with those three nurses."

I mean it could be you. You do work at the hospital and working your way up the ladder very nicely. I'm proud of you for what you have accomplished. I just wish I could have been the one to share those many happy days you came home to say you had been promoted again and we would have celebrated with a candlelit dinner and bottles of champagne and even the bad when you were upset because you had lost a patient. I'd run you a nice hot bubble bath and rub the soap suds from your wet naked body as we washed the horrible day off of your body. But it wasn't me. I wasn't the one comforting you when you were sad and in need.

We never had the luck, did we?

I glanced over nervously and saw your long brown hair, but you had your back to me. Turn around beautiful, let me see you once more. Let me relive that very first moment once again.

"Go and say hello." Danny grabbed my arm from across the table and attempted to lift me up.

I couldn't help but laugh, we really had gone back to being 12 again.

"Wait for her to turn around and if it is her, I'll go over." I pushed his arm away but I couldn't hide my nerves very well. I never could. My armpits began to moisten, the palms of my hands were soaking wet, my heart was beating fast and my stomach doing summersaults like it was guaranteed a gold medal at the Olympics.

How do you still have this affect on me?

I took my eyes off of you for 5 seconds to take a sip of my drink only to find you had disappeared when my eyes had returned to the bar.

"Where did she go?" I look over at Danny who seems at confused as me as he glances over. "Want me to go and find her?"

I shake my head and laugh. "No, I'm not desperate. She'll be back."

I wasn't sure if I believed it myself but it's the hope that kills you. You've been in and out of my life so much over the years that I'm not surprised when you disappear on me anymore.

                                     ~~~

The night went on and I knew you were still here as I saw your friends at the bar throughout the night, one by one. You had bought the first round of drinks, so it had to be coming around to your turn again soon. 4 drinks in, you were bound to be a little tipsy by now. I had peeked through the crowds on the numerous trips to the bathroom throughout the evening so far but I hadn't found you.

Did you know I was here? Were you hiding from me?

"I think I'm ready to call it a night, mate. I'm so tired." Looking across at Danny who was running his fingers through his blonde floppy hair.

"Already? Since when did you turn into a lightweight? Come on. One more?" I tried and failed miserably at getting him to stay for another drink.

He shook his head. "Not for me. I need food, a shower and bed."

I rolled my eyes and shook my head at him playfully. But in all seriousness, what was I going to do now?

I can't just leave you here, Katie. Knowing you might need to be walked home should you be too drunk to take yourself. Would your friends make sure you got home?