She Wasn't You

Chapter 33

I would bide my time, there was no need to rush this. I couldn't afford to become sloppy now. I couldn't have her being the reason I was caught.

I was so close to having you again, Katie. I could smell your perfume in my nostrils again, the scent I used to crave all day long. Did you still wear the same scent? Highly unlikely but I was so close to finding out.

I couldn't have this bitch be the reason I put our reunion into jeopardy but on the other hand I couldn't have her breathing any longer. She didn't deserve to waste oxygen anymore, she didn't deserve to share the same air as you.  

I knew I wouldn't have to wait long for my chance, this woman had the bladder of a 90 year old, I just had to hold my own need for the bathroom a little longer. I nursed my pint longer than usual, I couldn't risk being spotted by popping up to the bar for a refill, so this one had to last me.

"Come on bitch, get up." I whispered to myself as peered over my now open laptop. It was time for us to reunite.

I was becoming agitated as I waited, the old man on the table beside me reading the newspaper, the sound of him turning the pages becoming unbearable almost like nails being dragged a long a blackboard or when your knife drags along the bottom of a plate when you're eating. On more than one occasion I almost jumped across to snatch the papers from his grasp.

Finally, I saw her smack her hands down on to the table in front of her as she pushed the chair backwards from beneath her. I watched her mouth something to her friend before standing up and pointing to the toilet to a member of the bar staff who confirmed that was the direction to the ladies room.

This was it, the moment I had been waiting for. Years in the making, this would be her final trip to any bathroom on this planet. Time for her to bid the world a very slow, painful goodbye.

I had to play this cool, I couldn't go rushing in behind her. I couldn't afford to cause a scene. I waited a minute or so before standing up myself and making my way towards the bathroom, attempting not to catch her friends eye to raise her suspicions. This was a stealth mission.

Looking around to find the quickest route back to my seat and the exit. I left my laptop behind, safely tucked back into my bag ready to grab and go once the mission was successfully over. I needed to make sure I got out of her quickly and without raising any alarm bells or making it look too obvious.

As I passed everyone in the bar, I was now feet from the door, the ladies sign now visible.

This was it. Game face on.

"Tommy?"

What the fuck?

I feel a hand on my shoulder.

"I had a feeling you'd still be in here. What you drinking?"

I turn around to see Danny's happy smiling face.

Fuck!

"Hello mate, listen, go back outside, we need to go to another pub, okay? Just trust me. I'll explain on the way."

Confusion surrounds his face. "What? Well okay but I can wait for you to go to the toilet first."

I shake my head, I was running out of time. I didn't want her to see me. "No, I can hold it. Let's go. Let me just grab my bag and we'll get out of here."

Danny knew me well enough to know when I was flapping, it was for a good enough reason so without any further questioning, he headed towards the exit as I grabbed my bag and shuffled out of the door before Caroline returned.

Fuck! Did this woman have 9 lives?

                                   ~~~

"What was all that about?" Danny had stayed quiet until we reached a pub far enough away from where Caroline was for her to show her face in front of me again.

"Caroline was in there."

"Oh, I didn't see her."

I shook my head. "No, she went to the bathroom."

Another quizzical look towards me. "Well, why were you going there too? I thought you'd have got out long before that. Oh, was you going in there to try and re-kindle something? A quickie over the sink for old times sake?"

I couldn't help but smile. He knew full well that wasn't going to happen in a million years but he knew it would get my back up yet lighten the mood at the same time, a double edged sword to make me feel a little more at ease.

"Yeah, let's go with that scenario. Now get me a drink, I need one after that."

As he returned with the drinks, the conversation soon moved on away from that lucky bitch. She should not be breathing right now, Danny had no idea he'd just saved someone's life.

"You going to the funeral? I know you weren't that close to Nicola. So just asking so I know whether I need to find another plus one at short notice."

"I'm not sure the term plus one is often used at a funeral, Dan. But yes, I'm going. I didn't like her back in the day but I didn't hate her enough to enjoy seeing what happened to her. It's awful."

"Yeah, it's going to be weird seeing all those faces again. Might bring up a few old memories, imagine how many people could potentially cheat after seeing their childhood sweethearts. Don't worry though mate, tell Ellie I'll keep you chained to me. There's no way I'll allow you to sneak off with your Katie. So you can get that idea out of your head, right now."

I shrugged my shoulders. "Hadn't even crossed my mind, mate. I don't think I'll be there long anyway. Plus, it's going to be difficult for you to get with your childhood sweetheart, seeing as she's the one in the wooden box..."

Maybe I shouldn't have said that as he took a mouthful of his drink. It wasn't long before it was sprayed over me as he laughed out loud. "Fucking hell, Tom. There's no need for that. Show some respect at least." He continued giggling.

"Sorry, I get awkward around death. Just make sure I keep my mouth shut on the day. I'm not sure my awkward humour would go down to well around her family and friends."

He finally composed himself, taking each breath in slowly to regulate himself again.

"I need to be honest with you mate, I'm genuinely worried about bumping into Katie again. It's playing on my mind a lot."

I needed to talk to someone about this, it was something that did worry me as much as I wanted and needed it happen again, there was a part of me that didn't want to open up that wound again. I couldn't bare the rejection from you again, Katie. I'm not sure I could handle it again, all these years later.

"I know mate, it's going to be tough but we're all older now. I'm sure it won't be as awkward as you're imagining it will be in your head."

I knew he was right but to be fair to him he had no idea what I was fighting internally, that I was the reason this funeral was even happening. Would I be able to hide my guilt when the inevitable questions would come up in clusters of conversations? Her murder would obviously be the hot topic. I couldn't risk slipping up in any conversation and I had to be aware of my body language and surroundings at all times.

I was still planning on pressing ahead with the plan I had in my head. There was only one way I could take any potential attention away from myself. It was fool proof and I knew it wouldn't fail.

There was no other option.

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