She Wasn't You

Chapter 24

2001

Turns out someone would snitch on me and quickly. By the Sunday evening, Sammy had found out about 'Newspaper Trousers' and we were over. In just over 24 hours of the incident, my relationship had been ruined, by me and I was single again.

My week went from bad to worse. Our cup final on the Wednesday evening didn't go as planned. We lost 1-0 and while my head wasn't as in it as maybe it would have been as we went in search of the equalising goal, I pushed myself too far, chasing a long ball, my calf muscle seized and decided to pull completely with 10 minutes remaining. Our hopes of a cup win dashed along with my relationship.

My injury kept me away from football for 4 weeks, fortunately the cup final was our final match of the season, which meant I had time to get for before the start of next season where we all promised each other to stick with the team and right the wrongs of last season. This is why I loved these boys, the strength, the character and the want to win between us all was commendable. Although, I knew there was a snake in the grass, one of these boys snitched to Sammy.

Turns out I couldn't trust them all.

                                 ~~~

Summer was an odd occurrence, as it was the first since we had know each other that we didn't spend a minute together. I missed you but I knew I had pushed you away, Katie. I knew I had put my own happiness before you.

On return to school in September, my final year. Potentially our final year together but it didn't take long before I realised this wasn't to be our year, there would be no happy ending to our 4 year story.

To my surprise, you and Bradley had parted ways over the summer and returning to school you had a familiar face and arm around your neck, once again. Ricky!

Why did you keep finding your way back to him? Why did you never turn to me when you were in search of companionship and love? You know I would give you the world, if you asked for it?

It made me question everything, looking back on all of what we had been through together.

Did you ever really like me?

That year, for some unexplained reason our two classes were joined together for our P.E lessons. Was this fate attempting to give us a chance? Allowing us 2 hours each week together to rekindle whatever it was we had?

I wasn't complaining, I got to see you in shorts for two lessons a week and for once not from my classroom window, admiring your sports lessons, as I had for the previous 3 years. This time, your legs were mine to admire right in front of me.

I remember that look you gave me when we had the option of two sports for a week. One being football and the other orienteering. For starters, you already knew how much I loved football but I noticed you had raised your hand for the orienteering team and I shocked myself probably as much as I shocked you that day as I too, raised my hand to pick up a map and a compass. To this day, I still have no idea how to use one or read a map but it was my way of proving to you that I was willing to give up what I loved just to spend time with you.

Do you remember when I found you and Nicola lost in the woods? Granted, I was lost too as we were all so far of course, it was laughable but between us we managed to get back on track, through guess work and luck more than skill. Even then, we couldn't be alone. She was there, yet again.

If I had found you alone that day, I would have attempted to kiss you and make up for my failed attempt last summer. Would you have kissed me back? Could I have at that moment broken whatever it was you and Ricky had? Could that have been the moment we spent the rest of our lives together?