Reviews 2.0

1983 (onebluerose)

Reviewer: onebluerose

Author: ryeshalester

Cover: 7/10 

The cover is very simple to the point that it is not eye catching and does not pique interest. I am very sorry but I think you should work on a new cover. There are readers who base whether they'd read a book or not on the cover.

Description / Summary: 6/10 

The description does not catch my interest. I don't see anything unique that the story has to offer. I suggest writing a summary that presents the main conflict of the story without including any spoilers. Let the reader's mind come up with lots of questions with just this part. This book has more to offer and the summary doesn't give it any justice. 

Chapter Review: 8/10 

There were little to no grammatical error and spelling mistake. The utilization of metaphors are excellent! The chapters are really long and this could be a double edged sword. In my personal opinion, having long chapters in a novel is great but as for this platform, Wattpad, I think you should shorten each chapter by maybe just a bit. But then again, it's just my preference. 

Prologue 

The tone you've set in this chapter was really heavy, the emotions really sad or maybe even depressing. The descriptions were written well but I noticed it was heavily inclined with the character's emotions and minimal actions. There was not much description that let me visualize the setting/place he was in. Please rework this unnecessarily long sentence. There so much crammed in here. "I flicked my tongue out as tear after tear streamed from my eyes as I dragged a hand down to my chin."

Chapter 1 

This chapter was full of emotions and theories about love. It was written well. The vocabulary in this chapter was also rich. The second sentence, "A variety of words..." contains two same words (somebody) that makes it sound redundant though. I just want to point out that I got quite impatient about a third through reading this chapter. I felt like nothing was really happening. It's not until the bookstore scene that something actually happened and it got interesting. 

Chapter 2 

This chapter was really good. Compared to the previous one, this had substantial amount of action in it and, as a result, not boring. The emotions were described really well, the tension building was good too. There's a bit of mature content but all in all its great! 

Activity of the Writer: 9/10 

The author replies to some feedback/comments on the story. 

Plot: 9/10 

So far, the story is good and has potential. I can see how it could go different ways. Though it only started to pique my interest right on the last half of chapter one. 

Overall Advice: 

The story is good and is written well. My only advice is to edit a few word usage errors here and there. For example, heel instead of heal, taut instead of taught. Worldbuilding was very weak, even just the setting description was lacking. The story development was a bit fast. Tension building was good though. I am excited as to what this story has more to offer. 

This is just my opinion. A single person's point of view. Please know that the things I pointed out are not flat out negativity but rooms for improvement. Also, please feel free to ask questions if you have any. Thank you for trusting me!