White Gold *Completed*

Stay High

Adam's Pov

"I gotta stay high

All the time

To keep you off my mind

Oh, oh, oh

High

All the time

To forget I'm missing you..."

Tove Lo, Stay High

I looked at myself in the mirror of the dimly lit bathroom. My eyes were unfocused and bloodshot from the weed, my hair was tousled and standing on end, my lips were red.

Behind me, Oliver was buttoning up his black shirt, his cheeks flushed and a dreamy smile on his face. I turned on the faucet and ran my hands under the water, splashed my face and tried to tame my hair. All the while guilt gnawed at my stomach while my head grew more and more fuzzy.

Oliver pulled a joint from his pocket and lit it, the flame illuminating his features and already dazed eyes. I sighed.

"Don't you think you've had enough?"

He raised a brow. "I never thought I'd hear you say that, Ad- Alex."

"You're the only tech working tonight, I need you in your head." I said, turning to him and leaning against the sink.

Ollie took a deep puff and sent thick clouds of smoke my direction and I involuntarily inhaled. At least it was the good stuff.

"I'll be fine. Just be on stage when you're supposed to be and things will run smoothly." He kissed my neck, letting his warm, smoke flavored lips linger on my sin. I bit my tongue and quickly left the bathroom, combing my hair down in front of my eyes and taking the stairs backstage, wobbling a little on my trek.

Over all, Ollie didn't do too bad. Half way through my set though I felt so sick I was sure I would throw up right there on stage. We had a full house (only maybe 100 people) and the crowd was boisterous so I hoped my mistakes went unnoticed.

I didn't stay for a drink afterward like usual, opting to head straight home, walking the dark streets, head down. How had my life become like this? Once more I was running from something, trying to drown my feelings in alcohol, drugs, and someone else's arms, trying to just stay high to forget about her. But it wasn't working. Nix was still the only one on my mind. Oliver was sweet and fun, but I couldn't get myself to connect with him, like a barrier was between us that would never come down because there was nothing beyond it.

But here I was, a world away from home, no longer performing my own music, I hadn't seen my friends or family in nearly a year.

Maybe this was how it needed to be, though. I'd destroyed Nix and didn't deserve to be with her again, so if a half life, empty and confused, was what I had been relegated to then so be it.

I returned to my empty and dark home I passed out on the couch, fingertips tingling and head still spinning, images of a red haired, blue eyed girl taunting my dreams.

(Sorry it's short, guys, but at least I got something up finally! I've been SO busy and tired with life and haven't been at all creative, but I'm working on it!

Let me know what you guys think in the comments!

And as always I will see you in the next chapter!

~CG)