White Gold *Completed*

Ireland

ADAM

It was cold and rainy when the plane landed at the Cork airport, and after some ridiculous turbulence I was relieved to be on steady ground once more. I took a cab into town and it brought me straight to my new home and  unloaded my bags in record speed. The landlord was waiting on the front step, smoking and gazing off down the street. When he saw me his gray eyes narrowed as he took in my appearance, before he deemed me worth his attention. After all, I had just paid for the place.

“Hi, you must be Caulan?” I asked with a kind smile.

He nodded. “I am. Adam?”

“Yes sir.”

We shook hands and he handed me the small silver key to the house.

 “I can give you a quick tour in case you have any questions.” Caulan offered. “Okay. I appreciate that.”

Caulan was kind enough to grab a couple of my bags for me and we set my stuff inside the front room, which had dark hardwood floors, a white three person couch, an oversized chair, and a fireplace with a black grate.

“The fireplace is of course wood burning. Cheaper than electric heat, y’know. Needs to be cleaned out every now and again.”

I nodded and we wandered into the small dining room, which had a mini chandelier above a four seat table. There was galley kitchen that was a little outdated, but rustic. There was a bathroom off the laundry-room. The narrow stairs lead to three bedrooms and one more bathroom, complete with a stained glass mirror above the claw-foot tub. A lot of interesting styles going on here.

I found nothing wrong with the place on first inspection, so Caulan parted ways, saying that if I needed anything to just call.

I hauled my suitcases upstairs to the biggest bedroom and took my time unpacking, letting my mind wander. I felt...nothing. I didn’t know if I felt stressed or lonely or sad. I was just numb. God, I was so sick of that feeling, but it seemed the only other emotions that would bombard me would be those of my guilt and betrayal. Here I was, alone in a foreign country and left to my own devices. Maybe that wasn’t the best idea. The thought of trying to keep myself together, distracted and safe from my own mind, was....scary. Because I knew I couldn’t do it. Although now I was getting a little better in telling myself that I wouldn’t always feel this way. I had to start believing that things would eventually get better, in one way or another.

Bags unpacked, I decided that now was as good a time as ever to find a store to stock up the fridge with. I put the house key on my key ring, cell in my jacket pocket, and locked up behind me. The drive to the nearest store wasn’t very long, and the store was barely more than the size of the average American gas station that had all the snacks and slushy bars. When I walked in, the sounds of boisterous laughter and heavily accented voices met my ears, but stopped fairly quickly once eyes fell on me. I gave them the kind of smile you give when passing a stranger on the sidewalk, accompanied by a head bob.

“How are you?” I asked. Please don’t judge me please don’t treat me weird.  

The graying man behind the checkout counter cracked a huge smile, as did the other men.

“You must be the new guy that moved inta Caulan’s place, aye?”

I nodded. “I am. My name’s Adam.”

“Nice to meet you, Adam. I'm Luke.” He went around introducing the other guys and I greeted them kindly, then carried on with my shopping.

 Half an hour later I checked out, said goodbye to the patrons, and proceeded to load up my car.

And that’s when it started, and when I realized it. Here I was, alone. More alone than I had been in years, to be honest. No one was messaging me, no one was vying for my constant attention and there was no one to talk to. Even when I had moved out on my own for the first time and got small jobs acting and singing and working at Starbucks, I was always surrounded by people; friends, family. But not now. There was no one paying attention to me for the first time in almost a decade. Wow. Way to be selfish, Adam.

But that’s what I was. Selfish. Obsessed with attention and wanting the world to revolve around me.

 I connected my laptop to the small T.V to watch some movies because nothing appealing was on the few channels that came in. But I couldn’t focus on the drama or music score, which I usually enjoyed. This house was quiet and all the ‘house sounds’ were different than what I was use to. The wind was insane and branches knocked against the windows for hours.

My first night in Ireland was cold and lonely, and I foresaw many of these same nights in my future.

God. Was I ever going to get that damn girl out of my head?

(Sorry it's short, guys! I'm working on it, but I'm having a great time on vacation! I will write when I can :)
~CG)