Somewhere Only We Know (boyxboy) (kellic)

Chapter 21

(A poem by Erin Hanson)

There's a truth not many know about the world while you're asleep,
That the wind slips through your window, to steal the secrets that you keep,
And if you don't believe me; then you're welcome to your doubt,
But have you never stopped to wonder what it's whispering about?
What else in the world could make the treetops bend and sway,
But the weight of all the words, that no one ever dared to say?
And since it's while you're sleeping,
secrets are easiest to take,
it's no surprise,
those with the deepest are the ones kept wide awake.

-
Vic's POV

Saturday night, I received a text from Kellin.
I read the words over and over in my head.

Guess who's not a virgin anymore!

I felt sick. And this time, because of the stupid body that I had and the news that I'd gotten, I actually went physically sick. I mean it, I had already thrown up twice and thinking about it just made all the vomit come back up. I was heartbroken. Despite knowing it was going to happen beforehand, I still hadn't really let it sink in that he really was and forever would be, straight and not into me. The text was just a slap in the face.

But since I was a really damn good friend, I was letting him come over to gossip about it. My mouth reeked of vomit and I was still sat by the toilet in a slump. I shook my head at myself, I am not gonna sit here and feel sorry for myself. I'm not pathetic. You know what? I'm gonna slap a smile on my face and I'm gonna talk to my best friend about sex.

I cringed at the mere mention of the word and almost sat back down, but I opted for brushing my teeth instead and getting myself together for his arrival.

Preparing to face him was a lot harder than I had anticipated and now with him waiting in the other side of the front door, my intestines had wrapped themselves around my lungs and I was quite ready to collapse from lack of oxygen. My brain wouldn't let me though, so I opened the door and braved through the greeting.

"Hey, the man is here." I grinned. Alright Vic, you're on a stage in front of all the celebrities you look up to, play the part right. Kill it. "I'll get snacks, I wanna hear all about it."

Kellin's face was the happiest I'd seen in a while. I ran to the kitchen real quick to get some animal crackers and Hi-C juice boxes and hurried back to Kellin who was now seated on the couch.

"Okay, is anyone home?" Kellin asked, his smile still hadn't left. I shook my head.

"They're both at work." I spoke. I sat criss cross on the couch and faced him, popping an animal cracker into my mouth. I looked at my lap for only a second and Kellin was already at me.

"Are you okay?" Kellin asked softly. He lifted my chin up with his finger and looked at me. I silently cursed myself for how those eyes still made me feel. Especially when he looked at me like that. Like he cared.

"Yea. I'm great, I'm just excited for the story time!" I grinned, poking my straw through the juice box. Kellin hummed and took a deep breath before the grin found its way back in place.

"Okay so, last night I came over and she was all over me already, it was like she hadn't seen me in days or something- anyway, we're making out, she takes my shirt off..."

I became more distant as he went on. I could still hear what he was saying and I understood everything, but it was just playing in slow motion, it was amplified, it was sickening. I was so disappointed that I wasn't even sure I could feel how much it hurt anymore. I watched him, his hands animated throughout every sentence he spoke, his lips moving fast, eager, his eyes scouring from left to right and at me as he remembered the milestone. I smiled and reacted the way I thought he'd want me to. I said everything I thought he'd wanna hear. I listened with ever fiber in my body begging to tear itself apart. But I listened.

"Wow dude, I always knew you'd lose it before me." I laughed. Kellin messed up my hair a bit with a laugh.

"Hey, don't worry, we'll get you laid. And besides, it's not like you haven't gotten any action." Kellin mumbled. Suddenly Kellin stopped what he was doing and looked at me like a deer caught in the headlights. He can't be saying what I think he's saying.

"Um, you know- cause you've kissed girls before so you're not totally not getting any action. Like, isn't Katherine setting you up with her friend Dani? Yea, she told me, and-I-"

"Do you remember?" I cut him off.

"I don't know what you're talking about. Remember what?" Kellin played dumb. He looked terrified though I could tell he was trying not to. He lied.

"Please don't do this, you know what we-"

"Stop. Just don't. Don't say it, please." Kellin pleaded. He placed his hand over mine and looked at me desperately. He shook his head.

"I had sex with Katherine and it was great. You should really start looking for a girlfriend too." He bit his cheek before smiling at me. "Now, how about some good old Catfish? I think it's on right now, buddy."

Buddy.

I suddenly wanted to do badly tell him to leave but I didn't want him to see that I was hurt. I couldn't let him know how much it affected me.

"Actually, could you ask Katherine for Dani's number? I think I'm gonna give her a call." I smiled at Kellin. He looked at me a little surprised for a second before nodding slowly and pulling out his phone.

Pray for being bisexual, Vic. I'm done with feeling like this.

-

The rest of my night was spent crying my eyes out in bed. It just seemed like the world was out to get me at this point. Bad thing after bad thing just kept happening and now I didn't even have the one person I always ran to for comfort to help. Everything was a disaster and now I just felt like an angsty girl writing in her diary about how terrible her life was.

I needed a night out and I knew it was time to bring in the GSA. They'd help. We were all friends and it was a Saturday night. I don't see why not.

A/N: Hey lol, I always suck at updating haha, but I've kind been busy hanging with my friends and my BEAUTIFUL FUCKING BABE MARSHELL 😹😹😹 but um, enjoy? Don't forget to comment haha