Extinguisher (A Sequel to Firefighter)

Chapter 86

Chapter 86 Extinguisher

Alexa's POV

"You're what?" I tangled my hands in my hair, scooting closer so that I could get closer to his bed.

"My aunt lives in the city. I'm going to stay with her. I have no other choice, okay? They're going to admit me into some looney bin. I don't have a choice, okay? I'm moving into the city. It's not like I really have any reason to stay here even if I could."

"Cole, how could you trust this aunt of yours? She's never stepped in a done anything when you needed help. You can move back into our..."

"Stop. Would you please just stop? Don't you think that was the first option they gave me? I'm not happy there. This is for the best. I've already told your parent's I'm not going back to your house. I can't."

He hadn't looked at me since I'd walked into the room and I didn't think he would no matter what. Part of me wanted to tell him that Noah and I were taking a break, but that wouldn't do any good and Cole was much smarted than people gave him credit for.

"Will I...be able to...see you?" I asked carefully but he cast his eyes down even more, shaking his head and making my heart pound in my chest.

"No." he whispered.

"I have to be away from you. Alex...You have to understand. You get scared and you offer me all of these things but that doesn't change the fact that I can't have you, that I'll never be able to have you, not truly. So if you love me at all, let me go and stop coming here. You're going to make some man so happy one day and you're going to give him a family. You don't come from a broken home. You have people around you. Eventually, they're going to find out, so why don't you do everyone a favor and be honest? Let someone help you, Lex."

"No...Cole...don't do this." I whispered, right on the verge of tears, in that territory between holding it back and breaking down in hysterics.

I was pushed by a nurse out of his room, but I looked back the whole time, trying to memorize everything about him in case I never saw him again.

I've always wondered if pain builds, if at one point it builds up so much and your body can no longer take a single ounce more. I've always wondered if there was an actual breaking point and if there was, what happened when you reached that time. Did you collapse and die from the stress and anxiety taking over? Did you sit on a bathroom floor, crying your eyes out? Or did you simply just stop caring? I didn't know if breaking points existed, but if they did, this was mine....my scary, ugly breaking point.

.............................

"Lex, this has gone too far. Do we need to take you to a doctor, get you in for a session with Dr. Reed? He helped your mother through things. Maybe..."

"No. I just want to sit there."

"You've been sitting there for three days, Princess."

I looked up at my dad. I'd run out of the fight I once had to convince them that everything was fine and good. Now, they knew something was wrong. My phone had been permanently turned off and it was stored in my nightstand drawer, having given up on the chance of Noah calling or texting me.

"I miss him."

"I know you do, but it's not over. He'll come back. I'm sure he just needed some time to himself or...he..."

"He doesn't want me anymore, dad." I looked up into his sad eyes and I couldn't stop the worry from flooding my veins, so disappointed in myself for causing my family worry when they were all perfect, all courageous and brave...much stronger than I was.