Collide - Matthew Espinosa Fanfiction

40 | Payphone

JESSICA'S POV:

I didn't go to school today, well I mean I tried to, but Matt wanted me to stay home and take the day off. Most of last night was a blur, literally, but I'm a little better today. I called my mom and told her what happened. She said that she was sorry she couldn't be home to comfort me. My dad was very upset by the news too. He was always the one to take me horseback riding and almost loved being around horses as much as I do.

Matt said he was going to come home after school and comfort me more. I told him that he didn't have to do that, but he insisted. I could barely get him out the house. He claimed that he didn't want to take some big chemistry test, but I bet that was the last thing on his mind.

"Jess, I'm back!" I heard Matt from the other side of the door. I walked over to the door to let him in.

"How are you feeling," Matt's face went from happy to serious.

"Good."

"Don't try to spare my feelings Jessica. My job is to make you feel happy," he says.

"How happy?" I get curious as to if his version of happy is like mine.

"I want you to be as happy as when you go to lie down at night you stare up at the ceiling and smile to yourself thinking, 'how did I get so lucky?' That's how happy I want to make you feel." Cocky, but sweet. "So please telling how you are feeling so I can do my job."

"I don't know. Sad? I'm out of tears so you don't have to worry."

"It makes me sad that you're sad," he embraces me into a big hug.

"I think we should move out of the doorway," I laugh, but it sounds weird and forced. "Let's go upstairs, I'm kinda tired." I'm tired from doing nothing all day, nice.

We go upstairs into my bedroom and Matt jumps onto the bed. He pats his legs signaling that he wants me to sit on them I guess? I look down at the smiling boy in front of me wondering how he can be in such a good mood after school.

"When was the last time I saw you smile," Matt plays with my hands.

"Saturday? Maybe?"

"That doesn't count, it was on FaceTime. I mean in person."

"Last week?"

"Exactly! That's way too long ago. Smile for me," he says as if it were easy. Well I mean it is, but-- oh you know what I mean.

"I can't," I whine, but it seems to amuse him. After a good minute of Matt and I staring at each other, he reaches behind his head to grab the pillow and hits me square in the face with it.

"Matt!"

"I love you," he catches me off guard and pulls me into his chest.

"I hate you too."

"I didn't say hate."

"I know," I smiled.

"See I knew you had a smile in you," he kisses my forehead. "So what do you want to do now?"

"Homework, I need to catch up," I hop off my bed to grab my phone.

"You're so boring, I would throw a dance party with myself if I stayed home all day," Matt takes my phone and searches through my music. He smiles to himself before pressing something on the screen.

"I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you," the phone plays.

"This is such an old song, but it's one of my favorites," Matt grabs my hands and we start dancing around my room.

"Yeah, I, I know it's hard to remember,
The people we used to be
It's even harder to picture,
That you're not here next to me," Matt lip sinks.

"You say it's too late to make it,
But is it too late to try?
And in our time that you wasted
All of our bridges burned down," I lip sink back. We look like lunatics, but I'm enjoying every part. I feel young and happy and that's all that matters.

"Man, fu-"

"Don't," I warn him. He knows I don't like it when he swears. I mean it's kinda hard to stop when it's in a song since it just flows, but that's why there are clean versions.

"I'll be out spending all this money
While you're sitting round wondering
Why it wasn't you who came up from nothing,
Made it from the bottom
Now when you see me I'm stunning,
And all of my cars start with a push of a button
Telling me the chances I blew up
Or whatever you call it,
Switch the number to my phone
So you never could call it,
Don't need my name on my shirt,
You can tell it I'm ballin.
Swish, what a shame could have got picked
Had a really good game but you missed your last shot
So you talk about who you see at the top
Or what you could have saw but sad to say it's over for.
Phantom pulled up valet open doors
Wiz like go away, got what you was looking for
Now it's me who they want, so you can go and take that little piece of crap with you," Matt raps. "I think you should buy my new mixtape," Matt winks.

"We'll see."

***

Last night was fun with Matt. I even made him finish his homework. Trust me it's not easy when a 17 year old teenaged boy is running around the house looking for the peanut butter. Matt drove us to school today, we took a quick stop to Dunkin Donuts because he wanted a donut for breakfast. How healthy of him.

"I'll see you at lunch," Matt kissed my forehead and we walk our separate ways.

As I'm walking to the courtyard I see Alex and Zoe talking. I sprint over and embrace them in a hug.

"Jess! Oh my god we're so sorry to hear about Boss," they return the hug back.

"Thank you. It was hard the first night, but I'm starting to realize that this was ultimately the best choice for him."

"I had faith in you that you would make the right choice," Zoe says.

A few seconds later we all head to our classes. I walk into my math class and see Spencer on his phone, as usual.

"Hey," I sit next to him.

"Hey, how are you feeling," he puts his phone away.

"I'm good, thank you for asking. Do we have any tests coming up?" As much as I love to talk about myself, note the sarcasm, I hate missing school and not knowing what's happening.

"Yeah we have a test next Monday," he says as the teacher walks in with too much pink eyeshadow over her eyes.

"Good morning class, please put all your things away we have a pop quiz right now."

Lovely.

__________________________________________

Hey guys! Sorry I didn't update last weekend. My teachers are trying to fit in all these projects and tests before thanksgiving break and it's crazy! So glad I only have two days of school this week.

These past two weeks have been so crazy. I knew this world was messed up, but with all that has happened in such a short time is unexplainable. I don't even know what word to use to describe it.

What's your favorite new song off of handwritten revisited?!

IKWYDLS
Running Low
Act Like You Love Me
Memories

It's so hard to pick because they're all so good. I really like memories tho, it's different from his other songs.

How's everyone spending their thanksgiving?

I'm so excited for Thanksgiving bc I love spending time with my family, also all the food hahaa it's weird how much I love food okay bye.

Xoxo