Solangelo Oneshots

Unloved And Unlovable

Nico's hair clung to his face. His muscles ached with exhaustion and most of his body was covered in scratches, cuts and bruises from tearing through the thickets. His mouth was bone dry and his heart was beating wildly. In between ragged breaths came pauses where he didn't breathe at all. An invisible knife twisted in his stomach, creating a gaping wound that finally got the better of him and he fell to his knees sobbing and wringing his hands as he muttered prayers under his breath over and over again.

There was a difference between unloved and unlovable. He supposed he was both. Nico wasn't built to be loved, not built to feel warmth and kindness, and he wasn't going to feel it ever again. He thought he heard footsteps faintly over the merciless pounding of the rain and the mocking howls of the wind but there were none.

Never again.

Unloved and unlovable.

Unloved and unlovable.

Unloved and unlovable.

He screamed the words to the forest. Let the tree nymphs head his cries, let the whole of Camp Halfblood, nay the whole world, bear witness to the gut-wrenching sobs and yells that would sear into their minds. Let Hades hear his shouts of anguish and show the tiniest bit of remorse, the tiniest bit of regret, the tiniest bit of mercy.

But the Underworld had no mercy. It had only justice.

One last piercing cry, one last tortured wail and Nico hung his head, his heart thudding painfully in his chest as the realisation sank in. The arms he longed for, so tender and caring when all he deserved was bitterness and rough, would not wrap around his body. They would not pull him into a lap and against a chest where a heart beat steady. There was no fabric for him to grasp onto, no face to trace or hair to run his fingers through. No hushed words would reassure him, touches caressing his skin, lips brushing his ear. He yearned for the calloused hands that ran up and down his back and for the sad smile tugging at lips. He desired constellations of freckles that he'd count to calm him and deep, sapphire eyes wide with concern and full of love that would meet his so honest and kind that he couldn't help but believe them.

He wanted to laugh at the insanity. Tartarus could not compare to this, to the knowledge that Nico di Angelo really was unloved and unlovable and the Fates seemed determined to keep it that way. He turned his head to the heavens and wept. His last bit of hope, his last bit of light, his last love, his last thing to live for, his last ray of sunshine was gone.

Will Solace was dead.

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A/N

Hey, loves! Sorry I haven't updated for a couple of days. I've been away. Thought I'd come back with some angst.

I could not be more grateful for over 130 reads!!

Insomniac x