Spinning Out✔️

21. Codependency Issues and Painful Truths

Luna's POV

Wednesday, July 14th

12:28 pm

Something was off for sure. She wasn't moving the way she normally would. Everything was rigid and slow. Scarlet was a noddle in every sense. She could hold her feet at her ears and walk on her hands. But right now it wasn't like I'd ever seen her before.

Standing in the doorway, I listened to the music play while my eyes followed her around the room. Carmen was preparing the small group dance with Ozzie, Kingston, Gen, and Zhu upstairs in of the practice rooms. I'd just finished dance lessons with the primary level dancers downstairs fifteen minutes ago when I came upstairs to the main studio.

I'd been watching Scarlet struggle and restart about 5 times already.

A groan erupted from her mouth and she hunched over, pressing her hands on her knees.

I quickly moved to turn the music off from the laptop on the bench in the corner.

She looked over at me and sighed. Her face was flushed with fatigue and she dropped to the floor with a loud thud.

I walked over to her and looked down at her. With closed eyes and red hair splayed all over the floor, she huffed, trying to catch her breath.

"I take it the solo is going well," I remarked tapping her rib with my big toe.

She groaned again and cursed underneath her breath. "I don't want to do this anymore."

"Let's take a break then. We can walk a couple of blocks and go to Starbucks or something---"

"No!" She groaned covering her face with her eyes. "I can't do this anymore."

I slumped down onto the floor and patted her thigh. "Talk to me."

She sat up and I noticed the tears in her eyes. Her face was riddled with pain and exhausted. "I don't think I want to do it."

"The solo?" I questioned. "That's okay. We can ask someone else to step in."

She shook her head and wiped her eyes. "No, I mean dance." The way her voice broke made my stomach drop.

"What do you mean?"

She pushed the little red hairs out of her face. While catching her breath, I noticed the light green-purplish bruise sitting at the base of her neck.

I looked away and gave her a moment.

"He's everywhere," She whispered wiping her plans on her leggings. "So much of my life revolved around him and now I don't know me anymore."

"I left my family and moved here and we always just made sense." She was hiccuping as she spoke and wiping her eyes. I took hold of one of her hands and rubbed it. "He was my support for dance and I felt like I attached my love for it with him. Dancing used to make me feel li-like I was okay and now I just---ughh." She exhaled sharply and shook her head.

"Hey, it's only been a few days. It's a lot right now." I reassured.

She sniffled and looked off into the direction of the windows. "I hate that I'm like this. I feel so dependent on him. Like I can't be happy without him.

"I just don't want anyone worrying about me, you know?" Scarlet's eyes scanned my face quickly and her bottom lip quivered. "It's why I kept it a secret for so long. I don't want to be a burden."

Her words were an echo of my own thoughts. The number of times I felt like such burden to someone because of my condition weighed on me daily. I hated seeing her suffering like this.