𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐑𝐞𝐛𝐞𝐥 (ON HOLD)

64~ A breath of fresh air

Loraly

*

Thoughts of Ricky's and Alexis's conversation cling to my mind like my shirt does to my back on sultry, sweaty day. The beginning of the conversation doesn't seem particularly useful to me as Alexis was right and the chances of me forgiving him are very slim.

The end of the conversation, however, remains interesting to me. I took my leave after they mentioned a name. I realized if I stayed much longer, they would smell my scent.

Caroline.

That was the name I heard last night. It came as a surprise. Of course, I thought there was a woman involved, hence why my mate paid me no attention, but actually hearing his third-in-command say that name sparked some kind of irritation in me.

The whole concept of mates felt like a fairytale to me, making it hard to grasp. Just the thought of someone being made for me and me for another person so we could spend our days together and be happy and have a family scared me a little. I had thought I wouldn't be enough for my mate, that he would be a glorified wolf who  deserved someone of higher standards. I had thought he would make me feel loved and my insides feel like jelly with the littlest amount of effort.

Meeting him, however, I see something completely different.

The chance to experience these mushy feelings were taken- no, stolen from me by some female named Caroline.

Now, different theories come to mind when I think of that name in reference to what I heard Ricky say last night. For example, Caroline might be a family member of some sort, maybe a niece or a sister who got seriously hurt under Tobias' watch and he felt guilty and felt the need to push me away because he thinks he can't protect me.

Another theory is that Caroline was his lover or girlfriend or chosen mate. He fell in love with her and decided to forget about me, his actual mate. He chose her over me and decided she would be his Luna. The problem with this theory is that I can't help but wonder how far he went with her.

Did he go as far as to mark her? Officially making her his?

Did he get married to her?

Did he make her Luna?

Did they have a child together? Or children?

If they did, where is she? And their children?

Is it possible that they didn't take it that far and she left him for her mate, hence why he still holds some sort of rage and decides to take it out on me?

All thoughts brought me back to my only real, solid proof of Caroline's existed. That room. The one I saw Tobias come out from that Ricky forbade me to enter. I want to kill my curiosity and just go in there, but at the same time, I don't feel like I have the right to.

I had last night and this morning to think about it. I fell asleep last night at some point and continue my reign of thoughts. Thinking over how much time I've wasted and the sleep I've lost has made me realize I'm slowly starting to obsess over this matter which isn't like me.

Usually, I would let things fix themselves but  I'm stressing over this and it's ticking me off. It could be the mate bond or my genuine curiosity or pure boredom. Whatever it is, I shouldn't be this concentrated on a male's life even though he is my mate. The moon goddess set me up with him for a reason and trying to understand the reason for his behaviour is wasting my time.

I'm taking a break off of this for a while. I won't kill myself over a mate who doesn't cast me a second glance. He doesn't deserve it.

Continuous thinking has also made me realized that there isn't much to do in this pack anyways. With people aware of my presence and their sleeping with one open because of it, I wonder how they would react if someone saw me.