Eddie Van Halen imagines

Then do it part 1

Warnings: alcoholism, self harm
Word count: 877

I lay in bed, unmotivated and exhausted. I hadn't gotten up all day. My life had been pretty shitty lately, my boyfriend cheated, my brother died, my mom is a raging alcoholic and who knows where my dad is. Not to mention my wrists looked like fucking barcodes.

I heard my phone ring and I rolled over to pick it up.

"Hello?" I say

"Hey y/n you answered!" It was Eddies

"Yup."

"So wanna come over tonight?" He asks

"No I'm exhausted." I say

"Oh." He hung up

I roll my eyes, turning back over and drowning in blankets. My thoughts went everywhere, telling me my brothers death was entirely my fault and my moms alcoholism was because I wasn't a good daughter.

Thirty minutes pass and I hear my window open. I tense up. I hear a thud on my bedroom floor. Soon enough I see Ed.

"Eddie what the hell are you doing here?"

"I came to check on you." He says

"I don't need to be checked on."

"Y/n it's three in the afternoon and you're still in bed."

I roll my eyes.

"I came to get you up and take you out somewhere." He says

"No."

"Come on please?! I wanna help you."

I sigh.

"Fine I'll be downstairs in twenty minutes."

He smiles, walking out of the room and leaving me to get ready. I decide to take a quick shower. I brush my teeth, finish my hair and makeup, throw on an outfit and doused myself in perfume and headed downstairs. I wore baggy jeans and a black cropped tank top and a flannel over it.

"Wow y/n you look great." Eddie smiles

He leads me out to his car and we start to drive. I've got no clue where he's taking me but at least I'm getting fresh air, I guess that's nice for me. We stop at an ice cream parlor, he pays and we walk to a nearby park.

"So what's been going on?" He asks

"Not much." I say

"Really? So there's no reason why your in this trance lately?"

"What trance?"

"You know what I'm talking about." He says

"Well my brother died, my dad left, my boyfriend cheated and my mom is a raging alcoholic." I say casually

His mouth slightly hung open, in awe that I said that so casually.

"Wow y/n I'm so sorry." He says

"It's whatever. Everyone goes through shit." I say

"Yea but that doesn't invalidate what you're going through."

I didn't mention the fact that I'd completely fallen head over heals for him. He was always supportive and there for me, he was always respectful and kind, he was hilarious and fun to be around and not to mention hot as hell.

I threw away our trash and walked back to the table we were at. Thirty minutes passed, we chatted and joked around and all that good stuff.

"Do you know the time?" He asks

I pull back my sleeve, not thinking that I didn't even wear a watch. He looks at my wrist, his face going blank.

"Y/n?"

"Huh?"

"What's this?" He gently grabs my arms and rubs his thumb along my scars.

"Nothing."

"Y/n I know it's hard right now but this is bad. You shouldn't ever do this to yourself."

"Eddie I'm fine."

"Y/n I wanna help you."

"Eddie I-"

"Y/n I....I wanna kiss you." He says, his eyes moving back and forth from my lips to my eyes

"Then do it."

Moments pass, nothing happens. I decide to just walk away, knowing nothing would ever happen. Suddenly he grabs my wrist, spinning me around and pulling me in. He gently kissed me, gliding his tongue in and wrapping his arms around me. Minutes later he pulls away, my cheeks dusted in a light pink blush.

"Y/n will you be mine?"

"Eddie..."

"Y/n it's ok, we'll get through this together, I'm always here for you I swear."

"Ed I really like you, I do but.."

"But what?"

"I'm afraid."

"Afraid? Of what?"

"That you're gonna leave, that I'll mess up and ruin it, that I won't be enough, I'm afraid Eddie."

He pulls me into a safe hug, gently squeezing me.

"Y/n I won't leave. And trust me if anything you're too good for me. I love you so much."

"Eddie don't make this harder than it has to be. We both know I'm a fucking mess. I always thought I might be bad now I'm sure that it's true cuz I think you're so good and I'm nothing like you." I start to cry

"Hey hey y/n don't say that. You're absolutely perfect, you're mind and your spirit, your heart and soul and eyes, everything about you is completely mesmerizing. You're completely and utterly stunning."

I sniffle, pulling back from his chest.

"I'm sorry."

"Y/n you did nothing wrong."

"Well I got makeup on your shirt."

"Oh your fine. I love you."

"I- I love you too." I sniffle

He wraps his arm around my waist and walks me back to his car, whispering sweet nothings into my ear, sending chills down my spine.