Behind the Curtain [Seo Changbin ff]

27

I had been walking for a hour.

The place was not close to the school at all, but I couldn't care less. I needed to find him, I didn't want to leave him alone in carrying the pain.

I finally arrived at the spot, panting.

Surely enough, he was sitting on that same bench staring in the distance, his back facing me.

I took a few careful steps towards him, breathing nervously, hands trembling.

He turned to see what the source of those steps was, his eyebrows furrowing.

His cheeks were stained with tears, his cheeks red. He was shivering due to the cold breeze, since he was not dressed properly for that kind of weather.

He was only wearing a leather jacket to shield him from the cold air of November.

- It's the wrong day to ask me out with those flowers, Jiho. - He turned to look back at the river, waiting for me to walk away in silence, but I didn't.

I stood still, holding those flowers with extreme care.

- These are for her. -

He turned to look at me again, this time his eyes getting watery, his lips quivering and letting out a choked sob.

- Thank you. - He smiled bitterly, once again turning, but this time expecting me to sit next to him.

I silently walked to the bench, sitting down without muttering a word.

- Chan told me you would have wanted to stay alone, so if you want me to leave it's okay... - I turned to him, placing my hand on his shivering back in comfort.

He turned to me, faintly smiling, shaking his head.

- No, please, stay. - He sighed, looking at the flowers and taking them in his hands, analyzing them. - I never wanted him to stay with me because he didn't know the pain. - He raised his eyes to look at me, holding back tears. - But you do. -

I smiled bitterly, hugging him and keeping him close to my body, hoping I could give him some comfort and warmth.

That was all I needed when I lost my mother, but it was also what I had never gotten. My father was too busy drinking to mind my own pain.

- You should be at school, not here minding me, Jiho... - He said lowly, his voice muffled by my clothes, in which his face was buried.

I chuckled, gently combing his hair.

- I couldn't leave you alone after all you did for me, Changbin. -

He held onto me more tightly, probably as a sign of thankfulness.

We stayed in that position in silence for a while, enjoying each other's presence and soothing touch.

A gust of wind blew cold against our bodies, and soon he started shivering again.

- God, you're gonna get sick! - I took off my puffy jacket, giving it to him to at least put it on his shoulders, knowing he could have never fit with those muscles.

- I should be the the gentleman. - He chuckled, wiping away the last tear stain on his cheek, but nevertheless taking my jacket. - Thank you. -

He smiled feebly, taking my arm gently and making me sit in between his legs, both of us facing the river.

He wrapped his arms around my waist, keeping me close and warm.

- So you won't get sick either. - He explained simply, squeezing me lightly.

I just smiled in response, too busy fighting my blush to actually mutter an answer.

- Thank you... -

We looked at the water flow slowly, the tide dragging yellowed leafs. The wind kept on blowing, but we were glued enough to feel warm and comfortable.

- Should we go? - He said after a while, nudging my waist with his fingers.

We both stood up, ready to walk to the car, but he suddenly stopped me.

- Wait, I almost forgot about these! - He picked up the flowers, admiring them once again. - I want to give them to her. - He whispered, turning to the river.

- They have meanings. - I said, guiding him with my hands into taking one flower at a time.

Purple hyacinth for sorrow.

Rosemary for remembrance.

White hyacinth for prayers.

Pink carnations for gratitude.

He threw them one by one to the river and watched all of them be carried away by the current in complete silence.

Then, we came to the last one.

I inhaled deeply, mustering the courage to say what I wanted to. I had thought about it for my whole way there, and it was too late to step back.

- T-This one is actually for you. - I stuttered, sweating nervously.

He turned to look at me with curious eyes, scanning the flower in my hand.

- D-Do you know what it means? -

He took the red rose into his hands, analyzing it and brushing its petals with his fingers gently.

He nodded.

Fuck.

Now there was really no backing away.

His eyes slowly trailed from the rose to my figure. I was sweating nervously, shivering and trembling.

He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out of it. He took one slow step towards me, gripping on the stem tightly.

I had fucked up.

- L-Listen, I-I'm sorry, I-I know it's n-not the right d-day, b-but i-it's just that you m-made me feel like n-nobody else before, a-and I-I d-don't know if this is r-right or not, b-but it feels like it... - I was ranting, throwing out words in hope of fighting back the panic attack which threatened of taking over me.

Tears were falling down my cheeks, my skin heating up and shivers worsening.

His eyes were dumbfounded to say the least.

- I-I... -

He took another step towards me, this time faster, staring at me in the eyes while his hand made his way upwards to cup my cheek.

And that's when he kissed me.