015 ; christmas

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YOU STRETCH AS YOU SOFTLY SCRATCH BEHIND HIMIKO'S SOFT EARS.

you were the only slytherin to have stayed back for christmas, so you had the common room all to yourself ; not like you would be spending any time in there anyways.

you stretch your arms behind your ears and grab two presents from your bedside table, one for harry, one for ron. you had also given hermione one, but ordered her not to open it until christmas.

"are you coming?" you turn to himiko.

she meows and snuggles deeper into your cave of blankets, "okay, then"

you make your way out of your common room and out into the hall, seeing ron and harry sitting at a table, talking amongst themselves.

you grin and plop next to harry, "happy christmas" they smile back at you, "happy christmas"

you place both presents in front of them, "oh.. i'm sorry [name], i didn't get you anything.." harry looks at you worriedly.

you wave him off, "it don't matter, it's nothing much anyways!"

you eye their jumpers with a grin, "nice jumpers"

they both blush and turn away, ron shakes his head, "you should have seen what harry got!" - he leans in closer- "he got an invisibility cloak!"

your lips part, "so like, it makes him invisible?" harry nods, opening the present you had gotten him. it was a few packets of lollies, except he couldn't understand what it said, it was in japanese after all.

he tilts his head, "what's it say?"

you grin, "oh! they say 'hi-chew'! they're a japanese lolly."

ron open his as well, it was just the same thing.

how you had obtained these? who even knows.

ron grins, "cool! are you japanese, or something?"

you nod, "yup!"

"wicked"

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YOU DIDN'T EXPECT TO BE WOKEN UP LATE AT NIGHT BY A SHOUTING HARRY WHO HAD SOMEHOW MANAGED TO GET INTO YOUR COMMON ROOM.

he was shouting things like 'you got to see this!'

you look at him in utter confusion, "how did you even get in here?"

he just shakes his head and dismisses your question before dragging both you and ron off somewhere else.

you were wearing an adorable pink set of fluffy pyjamas with  darker pink bear pockets on each side of the top which you had also stolen, seeing how adorable it was.

"come on! come look, it's my parents!" harry guides you both into a room, sitting by the end was a large mirror.

"i only see us" ron looks at him in confusion.

you groan slightly, "i'm too tired for this.."

"look in properly, you both, stand there" harry says and pushes you and ron into the middle of the mirror, you stare in.

"there, you see them, don't you?" harry points.

"that's me!" ron shouts out, you just continue to stare into the mirror.

"only i'm.. head boy! and i'm holding the quidditch cup! and bloody hell!! i'm quidditch captain too! i look good!" he grins.

"harry, do you think this mirror shows the future?" ron asks, hopefully.

"how can it? both of my parents are dead.." harry says, rather awkwardly before dismissing it.

"anyways.. what do you see, [name]?"

you shake your head as you stare into the mirror, "i only see myself."

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THAT WAS A LIE.

you had always thought your dream was to be able to be just like your closest friends, but in the end, that was still your dream, but not your biggest dream.

you had seen yourself in that mirror, yes. except, you were with your parents, and your friends. you were laughing away freely with them, seemingly chatting about just whatever that came to mind.

that, was your true dream.

your real dream, hidden beneath your love for blood and obsession to be just like those you love.

to live a normal life.

to be able to be disgusted at the sight of a bloody leg, to cry at the sight of a dead bird. to have parents or friends who wouldn't tell you you were a freak, or to 'wipe that crazy smile off of your face'.

that, was what you truly wanted.

but, that. was the most impossible thing a girl like you could ask for.

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words ; 696

date posted ; 08/03/22

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