More Reverse Batfam Trash

Big/Little Brother Turns One!

-today is the fourth of July, the only thing we are allowed to celebrate is Conner Kent's "birth"day-

"Why?" Conner asked for about the millionth time this hour.

"Because it's your birthday!"

"Why? I was never born."

"No, but you were freed from CADMUS one year ago tomorrow!" Dick said, he'd gotten used to breaking things down for Conner, they had to explain multiple things to him an hour, if only for Jason and Tim's weird taste in movie/book references.

"And here, on earth— or at least widespread western culture— we celebrate people coming into this world." Tim explained, flicking out his ballpoint pen and starting a list.

Conner frowned in confusion. "Why?"

"To show we appreciate them."

"Oh." The clone thought this over for a while. "Why?"

"Why do we appreciate you?" Dick asked. "Because you're our brother!"

"So brothers are required to appreciate each other?"

Jason snorted. "What, have you not been appreciating us?"

"No. I like you, I appreciate what you've done." Conner replied. "I didn't know that's because I was supposed to."

"Well you don't have to love your brothers, you just do." Tim explained, watching Jason pull a bottle of orange juice from the fridge and chug it straight. "...normally..."

Jason hiccuped a little, spilling a little juice on his shirt. He nonchalantly recapped the juice and tossed it back in the fridge, removing his shirt to toss in the hamper. "Anyways, we gotta celebrate little Connie's first birthday!"

Tim, still disgusted, raised his list to block Jason from his view. "We'll need cake— Alfred can handle that— presents, decorations, all that stuff."

"Like the decorations from Wally's party?" Conner asked.

"Yeah." Dick agreed. "Basically, but Bruce makes us do everything classier."

Conner considered this. "No balloons." 

"Why not?" Tim asked, annotating his previous list for details: vanilla cake, maybe pie, no balloons apparently...

"Con hates the sound."

"And the texture! I hate them!"

"I will buy a hundred balloons just for you." Jason promised.

"Don't." Conner ordered. "I hate them."

"That will be your present."

"I hate balloons!"

"The latex ones that squeak super loud..."

"I HATE THEM!" Conner yelled, causing the glasses on the drip rack to shudder.

"Jay, quit being a goonfuck." Tim scoffed. Those two were Always at each others throats, Jason had decided he knew Conner well enough to disregard personal safety and openly agitate his new brother. Conner was no less upset-able since joining the family, except that he complained less when they called him 'little brother', and was more okay with physical touching.

"I'm just playing with 'im!"

"You're a full grown adult!" Dick scoffed, wrapping his arms around Conner's midsection. "At least, legally."

"Hey! I'm an adult!" Jason protested, digging into a stale half-bag of tortilla chips. "You two are the babies!"

"Me and R— Dick aren't babies. Technically, we're classified as adolescents." Conner corrected, not acknowledging that Dick had clambered up his back for a better view.