Black Leather Jackets: College Bound

Throwing

2 weeks later
Toni's POV
I've had a few panic attacks over the last few weeks. It's been hard on both of us but it's getting better. Cher is finally healthy, whatever she had was terrible. I'm waiting at Tito for Cheryl, she had a lab today so her class went long.
"Hey baby," I hear as arms wrap around my waist
"Hey C," I laugh "How was class?"
"Class was fine," she hums kissing my cheek
I turn around and peck her lips.
"Lunch is on its way here," I say
"Where are the boys?"
"Also on their way here," I smile
"I missed your smile T, you haven't smiled in weeks,"
"I have so,"
"Not actually though, just.. the smile you use to make everyone think that's everything is okay. Not this smile. Not the one I fell in love with,"
I pout and she pecks my lips and giggles.
"Are you feeling better today ?" She asks
"A little, I guess,"
"That's good," She says "you have practice tonight?"
"Yep,"
"Can I come?"
"Ya coach said he doesn't care when you show up,"
"Ok,"
We stand there for a few minutes, flirting and having fun when the boys finally get here with the pizza.
"Hey girls, what's up?"
"We're just hanging out until you guys got here,"
We all sit down and eat when Brynn walks in.
I hate this girl, she's annoying, stalkerish and I'm pretty sure she has a crush on my girlfriend
"Hey Toni, hey Cheryl,"
"Brynn, what do you want?" I ask
"LR meeting, 6 minutes,"
Her style changed- to look, more like mine. Leather jackets, plaid, shirts I wear, pants I wear. She died her hair pink like mine
"We aren't interested," I sigh "leave us alone,"
"What about you Cheryl?" She asks "Toni seems to speak for you a lot,"
"Toni speaks for me because she's a little nicer than me," Cher says wrapping her arm around my waist "and also because I've been sick for the last month and irritable,"
"Babe, lets go," I say grabbing her hand "I'm done with this conversation,"
We walk past her and she grabs my arm
"You know you aren't good enough for her,"
"Do I?" I ask
"You know she will leave you,"
I shake her arm off and Cher and I walk away.
"You know she's wrong, right?" Cher says
"I know baby," I say, giving her a soft smile
I bring her hand to my lips and kiss her promise ring
"I love you babe," Cher smiles
"I love you too Cher,"
The boys followed us out so we decide to go to the fields early
"Babe, you wanna throw with me?"
"That always ends in you laughing at me,"
"Cmon babe, just try,"
"No laughing or your sleeping on the couch,"
I roll my eyes and grab a ball. We throw for a couple minutes.
"You're getting better babe," I say
She jams her finger and swears.
"Ow fuck Toni,"
"Toni?" I laugh "I didn't do anything!"
"You threw the ball to hard,"
I can feel my breathing getting sporadic, my body trembles and I sit down.
"T look at me, look at me," Cheryl says
...
Cheryl's POV
"BABE, BABE," I yell "TT you're with me you're ok,"
"I can't, I can't, I can't," she mumbles covering her face "go away, get away from me,"
I try and grab her hands.
"No stop, no stop, no no no," she says
I let go but sit beside her.
"TT you're ok," I whisper "cmon babe, you're ok,"
"Blossom, what's happening?" RJ asks coming over
"Panic attack? I think," I say "she'll be ok,"
"What do we do? How can we help her?" Austen asks
"They're getting longer every time they happen," I sigh "we just have to wait it out until I can touch her hands,"
"Stop Cheryl, Stop Cheryl," she mumbles
I look at her confused
"That's a new one," Reggie says
"Ya it is," I sigh
"Toni, I'm right here," I say "I'm right here,"
She starts crying but bats my hand away when I try and touch her.
"I'm all alone," she says "all alone,"
"T no you aren't," I say "no you aren't, we're right here,"
She sweating now, bad and starting to break out of it. She needs to focus on her mental health, but she's not.
"T, Toni are you okay?" I ask holding her hands
"No," she says pulling her hands back and putting them on her face
"Let's get you to the bleachers,"
She stands up- which she usually can't do alone this soon after an attack.
"Leave me alone," she says calmly standing up
"T.."
"Leave me alone," she repeats "don't follow me,"
"Ok, ok," I say "can I stay here?"
"Would you?"
"Of course T," I say calmly "I'll sit right over there, you come find me, come find me when you want to,"
She walks in the direction of the changerooms.
"What are you going to do?" Reggie asks
"Nothing," I say "stay here, and wait. She needs time, space, she needs her wishes to be respected,"
"Are you ok?" He asks
"Fine," I sigh "I'm going to do my paper, keep an eye on her,"
They all nod and I go to the bleachers. I don't have a paper to write, I'm done all my work and ahead in all my courses and I've done all of T's homework. I search up panic attacks and anxiety but it's all the information I already know. I already figured it out. T is always the same after panic attacks, wants to be isolated, or clingy.
She wants to be alone
That's fine.
I sit here for over an hour. The boys are out for practice and T is sitting on the bench in her equipment talking to the assistant coach.
She seems to be ok.
"Cheryl?" Her coach says coming over
"Oh hey Coach Evans,"
"Todd is Fine," he laughs "Do you know how Toni is?"
"She won't talk to me, so no," I say
"Why not?"
"Toni was getting better before Doug came back and she's back at square 1 now, some attacks she needs people after, needs me. And after some, she's scared of me, scared of what she could do to me and will not talk to me,"
"Life messed you two up, huh?"
"A little I guess," I sigh "she's getting better,"
"Do you want me to tell her to talk to you?"
"She'll come, when's she's ready," I say "she'll be ok,"
"She wants to practice, her file says after a panic attack you have to clear her?"
"Uhh, what are you guys doing?" I ask
"Running plays, doing cardio, and foot work,"
"Just um, she can go out, no tackling, tell the guys no making fun of her or joking around or anything. If she's breathing funny, or spacing out randomly- call her off,"
"Will do,"
"Do you mind if I stay?"
"Toni talked to me at the beginning of the season, and she's right. You shouldn't be alone, not with your past or your families enemies, you're welcome here anytime, even our film, if you want to sit in the back and do your work go ahead," he says "I want you to be safe,"
"Thank you,"
He nods and leaves to tell Tones I have permission for her to go in
She looks back at me and give me a soft smile.
They finish their practice and Toni walks over to me.
"Hey baby," I say
"Hi," she sighs "I'm sorry,"
"Don't be babe," I laugh "it's ok,"
"It's not," she says
"It's fine Tones," I say "how are you feeling?"
"A lot better," I say "a lot better,"
"Come here," I say "let me look at your eyes,"
She rolls her eyes and leans closer to me.
They look normal, not cloudy, she knows what's going on so that's good
Her eyes are really pretty.
"You like what you see Blossom?" She laughs
I peck her lips and she smiles.
"I'm sorry,"
"T, it's ok," I smile "I'm ok, I'm not mad, do you wanna talk about it?"
"Not really," She says "maybe later?"
"Ok, maybe later,"