Chapter one hundred and seven
"The future is unknown."
It was now March and Caroline was officially back in LA seeing as her tour had come to an end and she only had a few days back before she was in the studio working on her next album which she had been working on while she was on tour and it was to be called guts and right now she was in the studio right now recording one her songs for it that Jordan her producer said would be one of the singles off of it, as Becca was standing next to him, Caroline was in the booth with her headphones on as the track started, she started singing.
"Hey
Haven't heard from you in a couple of months
But I'm out right now, and I'm all fucked up
And you're callin' my phone, you're all alone
And I'm sensin' some undertone
And I'm right here with all my friends
But you're sendin' me your new address
And I know we're done, I know we're through
But, God, when I look at you
My brain goes, "Ah"
Can't hear my thoughts (I cannot hear my thoughts)
Like blah-blah-blah (blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah)
Should probably notI should probably, probably not
I should probably, probably not."
She the smirked.
"Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight, fuck it, it's fine."
And as she was singing the song, she began to remember Jesse and how after she thought they were over, she found him at the end of nationals and ended up all the way back in his hotel room and lied to everyone about it for months.
"Yes, I know that he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?
"I only see him as a friend, " the biggest lie I ever said
Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?
I only see him as a friend, I just tripped and fell into his bedNow I'm gettin' in the car, wreckin' all my plans
I know I should stop-, but I can't
And I told my friends I was asleep
But I never said where or in whose sheets
And I pull up to your place, on the second floor
And you're standin', smiling at the door
And I'm sure I've seen much hotter men
But I really can't remember when
My brain goes, "Ah"
Can't hear my thoughts (I cannot hear my thoughts)
Like blah-blah-blah (blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah)
Should probably not
I should probably, probably not
I should probably, probably not
Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight, fuck it, it's fine
Yes, I know that he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?
"I only see him as a friend, " the biggest lie I ever said
Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?
I only see him as a friend, I just tripped and fell into his bed
Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex
Can't two people reconnect?"
Then the band began playing as she dancing around and stepped towards the mic again
"The biggest lie I ever said
I just tripped and fell into his bed
My brain goes, "Ah"Can't hear my thoughts
The biggest lie I ever said
My brain goes, "Ah"
Can't hear my thoughts
I just tripped and fell into his bed
Thoughts
Blah
Thoughts
Blah."
The song then played out, as everyone then cheered "Caroline that was amazing! Now let's take a break and then we'll come back do vampire because after the here I am music video and the vampire theme if we do the same thing with this one especially with the title it'll be a total hit!" he voiced, standing up and walking off and as he did, Becca leaned to the mic "lunch?" she asked her, as Caroline huffed "yes please." she told her, taking her headphones off and walking out of the studio.
Having come back from lunch, Caroline had her headphones back on and was standing in front of the mic as she had the piano arrangement already done as it played in her ears, as she then started singing.
"Hate to give the satisfaction, asking how you're doing now
How's the castle built off people you pretend to care about?
Just what you wanted
Look at you, cool guy, you got it
I see the parties and the diamonds sometimes when I close my eyes
Six months of torture you sold as some forbidden paradise
I loved you truly
Gotta laugh at the stupidity
'Cause I've made some real big mistakes
But you make the worst one look fine
I should've known it was strange
You only come out at night
I used to think I was smart
But you made me look so naive
The way you sold me for parts
As you sunk your teeth into me, oh
Bloodsucker, famefucker
Bleedin' me dry, like a goddamn vampire."
Then the other band instruments came in along with the piano and as she did, she also began to think about Jesse, realizing that not only did he get her here but he also seemed to be a lot of where her music stemmed from.
"And every girl I ever talked to told me you were bad, bad news
You called them crazy, God, I hate the way I called them crazy too
You're so convincing
How do you lie without flinching? (How do you lie, how do you lie, how do you lie?)Ooh, what a mesmerizing, paralyzing, fucked-up little thrill
Can't figure out just how you do it, and God knows I never will
Went for me, and not her
'Cause girls your age know better
I've made some real big mistakes
But you make the worst one look fine
I should've known it was strange
You only come out at night
I used to think I was smart
But you've made me look so naive
The way you sold me for parts
As you sunk your teeth into me, oh
Bloodsucker, famefuckerBleedin' me dry, like a goddamn vampire
You said it was true love, but wouldn't that be hard?
You can't love anyone, 'cause that would mean you had a heart
I tried you help you out, now I know that I can't
'Cause how you think's the kind of thing I'll never understand
I've made some real big mistakes
But you make the worst one look fine
I should've known it was strange
You only come out at night
I used to think I was smart
But you made me look so naive
The way you sold me for parts
As you sunk your teeth into me, oh
Bloodsucker, famefucker
Bleedin' me dry, like a goddamn vampire."
Then she vocalized as that and the band played out the rest of the song as it ended, in which Caroline then let out a breath and took off the headphones "great! We'll work on getting those out to get your listeners ready to her the rest of the album and we'll work on the other ten tomorrow." Jordan told her, as Caroline forced a smile.
In which later on, Caroline was sitting on the couch at home, watching ten things I hate about you on the tv as Becca walked over and sat next to her "you okay? You've seemed different since earlier? I mean the emotion was in the music, the songs are great! Even better than the last ones. I've just..I've never seen you like this even with that Blaine guy which I totally could tell you guys had a thing with the way he rushed to you when you passed out on the floor in New York." she shared, and when she did, Caroline chuckled "yeah, um, we..we were a thing but now we're just best friends." she shared, and as she did.
Becca then furrowed her brows "then is it him? Or..or is it the blonde one because I remember something about a blonde doofus who always thought kissing would stop your from losing your mind." she shared, and as she did, Caroline laughed again "yeah and I swear sometimes he did it just because me crying freaked him out, but no, no, it's not..it's not either of them. It's um.." she said, taking a deep breath "it's Jesse." she told her, putting the tub of ice cream on the table, she stood up walking to the tv and holding her hand out to it as Heath Ledger was on the screen singing on the steps "he..he was my Patrick!" she voiced.
As Becca raised her brows "so you two hated each other?" she asked her "no, no! He was the older guy! He was the cool guy! Who made me want to be a star! Who was my first crush! My first boyfriend! Took me to my first party! He..he was.." Caroline was saying, and as she was Becca put her hand on her chin "your everything?" she asked her, and as she did, Caroline let out a breath "yeah, I mean he knew how to help me when I was nervous about performing. Hell he's even the reason I'm here!" she voiced, holding her arms out and laughing "and those two songs today just reminded me of it all." she added on, walking back to the couch and sitting down.
And when she did, Becca smiled, leaning over to her "and then what was the other one? The younger one?" she asked, and when she did, Caroline scoffed "Jake." she told her "ahh yes, the dancer." Becca mentioned, as Caroline pointed at her "hey, for the record, they all could dance. And also Blaine's not the only gay boy I made out with, I sang smooth criminal, the tension was definitely at a high." she shared "ooh! Okay, I see you've been holding out on me." Becca shared "well my relationships are kind of private to me but I've realized after this tour that your not just my assistant or my best friend, your my sister." Caroline told her, throwing her arms around her.
"Ohh! I always wanted a sister." Becca told her, hugging her back and as she did, Caroline chuckled "and I always wanted one who wouldn't be jealous of what songs I get to sing." she shared, and as she did, the two then sighed "so..after the second album...what are we gonna do?" Becca asked and when she did, Caroline furrowed her brows "hmm? I..I don't know. I thought there'd be another tour but I feel like we'll wait a little longer till we do it again so I don't know." she shared, and as she did, silence except for the movie overcame them.
"I'll get the wine." Becca said as she stood up, Caroline leaned forward and grabbed the tub of ice cream "I'll get us more snacks." she told her, as the two stood up, walking to the kitchen, having really no idea what the future held as of right now.