Chapter fifty four
"Hope ur ok."
Regionals was coming up, although as they were all sitting in the choir room, they found out about what Sebastian was planning on doing which was sending out a nude of Finn with heels on "that's it, I'm done. I'm leaving this classroom, and I'm going to beat that Sebastians kid's ass!" Finn voiced, as he got up to leave as the guys who were in there got up to follow him, Mr Schuester turned to him "Finn, chill." he told him.
"No, I'm not gonna chill. I'm done chilling." Finn told him, as Mike wheeled Artie in "the official show choir rule book states..that any real or perceived threat of violence, vandalism or humiliation will be met with the swift and unquestionable disqualification of the threatening parties team with extreme prejudice. It's right here, page seventy two, by law fifteen, section six, article forty four." Artie shared.
"Guys, I contacted the headmaster at Dalton." Mr Schuester shared "like you did when Sebastian almost blinded me? What did they do then? Same thing as they're going to do now...nothing." Blaine shared "exactly." Caroline stated, as Blaine went over and sat next to her.
"None of this matters now anyways, okay. We're not gonna let him beat us like this. I'm gonna perform at regionals." Rachel shared "even if he's gonna post a photo like this of me if you do?" Finn asked her, showing it to her "Finn, I'm not gonna negotiate with terrorists." Rachel told him.
"If someone posted a picture like that of me online, I'd probably kill myself." Sugar shared "twice..to be sure I was dead." Rory mentioned "look, you guys are just gonna have to deal with thing's like this. The more successful you get, the more garbage people are going to make up about you. They're gonna love to tear you down." Mr Schuester shared.
Although Finn was still focused on what Rachel said "I can't believe you would do that to me." he told her, as Rachel stood up "I'm gonna be married to you. Don't you think I'm gonna suffer the consequences as well? I just..I don't care about stuff like that. I love you, and we'll manage this together, okay. The important thing right now is that we win." Rachel shared "so, you wouldn't care if I photoshopped a photo of you looking like this and put it on the internet?" Finn asked her "our future depends on us winning regionals. It'll help me toward's my NYDA application." Rachel whispered to him "hmm. Hope you get in." Finn told her, handing her the photo as he turned walking out "Finn." Mr Schuester told him, but he didn't come back.
And by the next day, they all got interesting news about Kurofsky and how he tried to commit suicide all because some kids from his school saw him with Kurt at breadstix on valentines day and were posting mean stuff on his page and letting everyone in the school know he was gay, which was why Caroline was sitting at the floor of her locker with her knee's up to her chest, feeling absolutely guilty knowing she always treated him horribly because he was picking on Kurt, but if she knew he was struggling on his own, she wouldn't have been so harsh on him.
Starting to cry, she put her head in her hand's, and as she did, she didn't see Sam walking having been on his way to the bathroom from the god squad meeting, but when he saw her on the floor crying amongst all the students walking by, he quickly walked over to her "hey, hey." he told her, going down to her level, he went to put his hands on her shoulders, but when she felt his presence, Caroline quickly snapped her head up "no! No, don't try to make this, okay? Don't..don't try to make me feel better. I did this!" she voiced.
As Sam shook his head "no, no, Caroline, what happened to Kurofsky isn't you fault." he told her "isn't it? I..I always beat on him because he was mean to Kurt. I mean you weren't here Sam my freshman year, but we did Gaga week in glee club and that was when what Kurofsky was doing to Kurt was becoming a bigger deal, me, Finn and the rest of the glee club stopped him and his friend Azimio from beating on Kurt but..but I couldn't let it go especially when Kurofsky said that they'd bring other friends next time so instead of just letting them walk off, I kneed them both where the sun doesn't shine and told them that if they put their hands on Kurt again that getting hit in the balls would be the least of their injuries." she shared, sniffling.
"And I was right because the next time it happened, I punched him in the face." she added on "yeah, but so did I. That doesn't mean that you lead him to do this, Caroline." Sam told her, as Caroline chuckled, her voice breaking "but I did. Because when we did all that football stuff, even when he tried to be a civilized human being to me, I didn't believe him and still chose to be mean to him. And then.." she said, starting to cry again.
"Since I heard the news all I've been able to think about is how when Mr Figgins brought him into the classroom that day I thought his apology wasn't real but what..what if it was and I..I added to his trauma! It's my fault! If I hadn't stopped maybe..maybe he would've been in a school where their's people who look out for you rather than judge you for who you are! It's my fault! It's all my fault!" she voiced, sobbing, which made Sam start to cry "no, Caroline.." he told her, trying to hug her but when he did, Caroline shoved his hands away and pushed herself up and ran down the hallway, finding it hard to not blame herself for what had occurred.
Hiding in the choir room, Caroline was writing in her songbook, although this song happened to be one of the more sadder one's in her collection as writing it was making her cry, where Mr Schuester walked in "oh, hey, Caroline." he told her "hi. Sorry. Um.." Caroline told him, quickly wiping her tear's away "I'll go.." she told him, going to get up from sitting on the steps, but when she did, Mr Schuester realized she was crying "no. No. Um, we all even as faculty were unsure of how to handle what happened to Kurofsky. We were all hard on Dave, you know? We all thought he was gonna hurt Kurt." he shared.
"But I always took it too far, Mr Schue!" Caroline voiced, starting to cry again as she stood up "I can't stop going over everything in my head, I was their for Kurt and I was even their for Santana who was scared to come out, but no, I..I made him go to a school that made him feel unsafe to where he wanted to kill himself! And it's my fault, Mr Schue! It's just all my fault!" she voiced, starting to cry again, as Mr Schuester put his bag down and walked toward's her, pulling her into a hug, making her cry even harder.
The next day in glee club, they were all sitting in the auditorium on the stage in a circle "Mr Schue, why do you have a jar of peanut butter with one spoon?" Mercedes asked "yeah, there are sixteen of us here, and I'm only comfortable sharing a spoon with about half of you." Sugar shared "well, it's come to my attention that our good friend Rory Flannigan..has never tasted peanut butter." Mr Schuester shared, which shocked everyone "what?" Sugar asked "are you serious?" Tina added on "no way. That's impossible." Sam said.
"Rory, if you don't mind." Mr Schuester told him as he stood up so did Rory, as Mr Schuester then dug into the peanut butter, getting out a spoon of it, he handed it to Rory who ate it "oh, my god. That's the best thing I've ever had." Rory shared, as they all laughed, Rory and Mr Schuester sat back down.
"Mr Schuester, while that's incredibly moving, um, it's kind of been an emotional week for some of us." Kurt shared "yeah, Mr Schue. What's the point of all this?" Finn asked "the point is Rory just had a brand new experience something as simple as peanut butter. You guys are young, I want you to promise me that, no matter how depressed you get, no matter how hopeless or alone you feel, you'll try your best to imagine..all of the amazing experiences you have ahead of you." Mr Schuester shared.
"Mr Schue, look, I know we're a little dramatic sometimes, but I don't think anyone would ever consider taking their own life." Mercedes shared, as they all looked to each other "I did. Junior year. That was tough year." Mr Schuester told them as he exhaled "I, uh..I cheered on my math midterm..peeked at the answers of the guy next to me, and the teacher saw me do it." he added on "just cause you got caught cheating? I get caught cheating all the time." Puck shared.
"They called my dad at his office, and he was coming to pick me up." Mr Schuester told them as he exhaled again "how was I supposed to look him in the eye? I just kept picturing my dad..so disappointed in me. So..I walked up to the roof. I went right to the edge. One step, and all the pain and humiliation would be over." he shared.
"Is that true?" Kurt asked "that day, I promise you, it felt like it was the end of the world. But you know what? It wasn't. You know, for some of you, getting caught cheating isn't a big deal. But there's something..everyone has something that might take them up to that edge. And look at all the things I would've missed out on. I would've never met you guys or Emma. I would've missed out on everything. So, right now, I want you all to think of something..that you're looking forward to..big things." Mr Schuester told them all.
As everyone looked at each other, waiting for who was gonna go first "someday, I want to earn enough money to buy my folks a new place..so they don't ever have to through losing their home again." Sam shared.
As Mercedes went next "I'm most looking forward to meeting Rachel Berry's children." she shared, making everyone laugh.
Then Artie went next "I want to be there to see my kids first steps." he told them.
Then Sugar "I want to be there to see sex and the city part three." she told them "wow." Mr Schuester said as they laughed again.
Then Puck "I'm sort of embarrassed to admit it, but, I really do wanna graduate high school." he told them.
Then Finn "I'm gonna petition the army to change my dad's..dishonorable discharge status to an honorable one." he told them.
Then Quinn went "I'm looking forward to graduating from Yale at the top of my class." she told them.
Then Santana "I'm looking forward to the day when my grandmother loves me again." she shared.
Then Britney "I want lord tubbing ton to kick his ecstasy addition." she shared.
Then Blaine "I'm looking forward to marriage equality in all fifty states." he shared.
Then Mike "I'm looking forward to the first time I dance at Carnegie hall." he told them.
Then Tina went "I just want a song." she told them, making them laugh.
Kurt then went "I'm looking forward to watching my dad make a difference in congress." Kurt shared.
Then it was Rachel "I'm looking forward to being friends with all of you for the rest of my life." she shared.
Then Rory "I know this sounds silly but the peanut butter really is amazing, Mr Schue. Do you know what I'm looking forward to? Winning at regionals." he shared and when he did, everyone cheered as they looked to Caroline, Finn chuckled "I'm pretty sure Caroline could say the same, right, Caroline?" he asked her, although when he did everyone went silent.
"No, no, it's gotta be nationals." Santana mentioned, making everyone laugh "okay, okay, seriously, what are you looking forward to?" Artie asked her, and when he did, Caroline shrugged "I don't know." she told them, making everyone furrow their brows, she took a deep breath "I've never exactly like looking ahead, because every time I do, something bad always happens that changes everything! And I know that's how life is but I'm tired of hoping for the best and getting the worst. And maybe..maybe all I'm looking forward to is me being a good person because every time I think I am, it turns out I'm not." she shared.
As Mr Schuester looked at her "Caroline.." he told her, as Caroline shook her head "maybe I'm just hoping that Karosky and anybody else who's gone through something like that, where they didn't have friends like us, are okay." she shared and when she did, Kurt stood up and walked over to her and sat down next to her, putting his arm's around her, Caroline then chuckled although it came out more as a sob, she then looked over at Mr Schuester "I know that we have our setlist for regionals but if it's okay with you Mr Schue, I have an original song that I'd like to sing?" she asked, and when she did, Mr Schuester nodded "yeah, that's okay." he told her, feeling teary eyed as everyone else around her did "leave it to Caroline, to get us all to cry." Puck told them, making everyone laugh.
And soon it was regionals as the new directions were sitting in their auditorium they were wearing black dresses with yellow headbands and bows around them while the boys had black tops and pants with yellow bow ties and suspenders "and now let's meet our judges for the 2012 midwest regionals! Deputy zoning commissioner Melba Jackson Wright!" the announcer voiced and as she stood up, they all clapped "president of the Ohio plumbers union local 109..Mr Hart Beindorf!" the announcer voiced, as the man raised his hand they all clapped "and central Ohio's number one late night horror movie host.." the announcer said as Finn and Caroline looked to each other "no." they stated.
"Svengoobles!" the announcer voiced, as a man dressed like a vampire stood up in the auditorium as they all clapped "we watch him all the time!" Finn voiced, smacking Caroling in the arm "I know!" Caroline voiced, laughing, as the crowd soon calmed down.
"And from Westerville, Ohio..the Dalton academy warblers." the announcer then said, as the curtains opened revealing Sebastian and the warblers as they started singing.
"Come on, stand, up again
Stand, you're gonna run again."
Sebastian was then signing on his owners the other warblers harmonized behind him.
"Don't give up
You're gonna see tomorrow
That you'll be on your feet again
Sometimes the world's gonna knock you over
But you will see who are your friends (Ooh!)
Come on, stand, up again
Come on, stand
Stand, you're gonna run again
You have the power to face your demons
No matter how they go at times."
Then Finn and Caroline stood up and started clapping as the girl next to them looked at them "why are you cheering your competition?" she asked "life's too short. You should try it. Come on." Finn told them "guys, get up!" Caroline voiced, motioning for them all to do so.
"Come on, stand, (Come on baby!) up again (Stand yeah!)
Come on, stand, (You can baby!)
Stand, you're gonna run again
Pick up your will
And put on your face
If you need to, just take my hand (Take my hand)
It's time to demonstrate, don't hesitate (Don't hesitate)
Just get up and say "Yes, I can" ("Yes, I can")
Come on, stand, (Come on baby!) up again (Stand yeah!)
Come on, stand, (Come on you can baby!)
Stand, you're gonna run again
Stand, you're gonna run again
Come on, stand, (Ohhhh stand yeah!) up again (Stand up again!)
Come on, stand, (Ohhhh come on baby!)
Stand, you're gonna run again (Stand stand!)
Stand, you're gonna run again (Come on!)
Stand, you're gonna run again (Gonna run again!)"
Then the entire crowd was cheering, the crowd soon calmed down as they all sat down "thank you. Just a reminder to please make a donation to one of our charity baskets. We're set up all around the auditorium. Just look for the Dalton blazer. Please, give what you can." Sebastian told them all as he then stepped back in line with the other warblers, the warblers then started vocalizing as Sebastian started singing.
"The sun goes down, the stars come out
And all that counts is here and now
My universe will never be the same
I'm glad you came."
Then it went from being a slow song to more upbeat as the crowd cheered, Blaine and Kurt stood up.
"You cast a spell on me, spell on me
You hit me like the sky fell on me, fell on me
And I decided you look well on me, well on me
So let's go somewhere no one else can see
You and me
Turn the lights out now
Now, I'll take you by the hand
Hand you another drink
Drink it if you can
Can you spend a little time?
Time is slipping away
Away from us, so stay
Stay with me, I can make
Make you glad you came
The sun goes down, the stars come out
And all that counts is here and now
My universe will never be the same
I'm glad you came
I'm glad you came
Turn the lights out now
Now, I'll take you by the hand
Hand you another drink
Drink it if you can
Can you spend a little time?
Time is slipping away
Away from us, so stay
Stay with me, I can make
Make you glad you came
Can you spend a little time
Time is slipping away from us so stay
Stay with me I can make
Make you glad you came
The sun goes down, the stars come out
And all that counts is here and now
My universe will never be the same
I'm glad you came
I'm glad you came
I'm glad you came
I'm glad you came
The sun goes down, the stars come out
And all that counts is here and now
My universe will never be the same
I'm glad you came
I'm glad you came."
All the new directions were now standing as they cheered along with the rest of the crowd for the warblers, and soon they were off the stage and the crowd had calmed down as their other competition had gone up "now from our lady of perpetual sorrow high school..the golden goblets!" the announcer voiced, although when they started singing, it wasn't like your normal show choir but more like a choir in church.
As they all soon were in the choir room getting ready to go on stage "those golden goblet modrigal singers were way better then I thought they'd be." Puck shared "are you high? I couldn't hear they're instruments at all." Britney shared "Britney's right, they were hardly even a show choir, there was now show choir sparkle." Caroline told them "all right, guys, listen up. Don't let them get into your heads, okay? Stay focused on what we do best.' Mr Schuester told them.
"Show circle time. Come on, let's huddle up." Artie told them, as they all gathered in a circle "okay, uh..oh, Finn, you wanted to start us off?" Mr Schuester asked "yeah. I know it's kind of short notice, but..after the competition, Rachel and I are gonna get married..at the justice of the peace at the lima municipal center." Finn shared "and there'll be some light refreshments afterwards. My dads and I were rolling finger sandwiches all night long." Rachel shared "with everything that's happened lately, we thought a lot about what Mr Schue said. We didn't want to wait anymore. We just want to live everyday like it's our last. So, we wanted to thank a lot of you guys..that were supportive of our decision to get married." Finn shared.
"And for those of you who maybe weren't the biggest fans of our impending nuptials, we thank you also. So after we win, we would really love it..if all of you would come to our wedding." Rachel shared as everyone cheered and applauded, Caroline started laughing "wow, leave it to these two bumbling idiots to make it all about them, huh?" she asked, ruining everyone's mood "Caroline, what the hell is wrong with you?" Finn asked her, but Caroline ignored him, putting her hand in the middle "hands in." she told them, as everyone put their hands in "amazing!" they all voiced, bringing their hands up.
Then they were standing on the stage they had a smoke machine as Rachel was the only girl on stage, Caroline on the others stood in the wings of the auditorium watching as Rachel started to sing.
"I came to win, to fight, to conquer, to thrive
Then as she walked down from the steps, Caroline and the other girls walked onto the stage, intermingling with the boys who had walked down as well.
"I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise
Rachel and the new directions girls all then sang, as they danced.
"To fly
To fly."
Santana then stepped to the front and sang.
"Uh, yo, yo."
Artie was then up there, next to her as he sang.
"I used to think that I could not go on."
Santana then sang
"I wish today it would rain all day
Maybe that will kinda make the pain go away."
Artie then sang.
"And life was nothing but an awful song."
Santana then sang.
"They got their guns out aiming at me
But I become Neo when they aiming at me (If I can see it)"
Blaine then made his way to the front as he then sang with the boys as background vocals.
"Me, me, me against them
Me against enemies, me against friends (Then I can do it)
Somehow they both seem to become one
A sea full of sharks and they all smell blood (If I just believe it)
They start coming and I start rising
Must be surprising, I'm just surmising (There's nothing to it)"
Him and Santana then sang.
"I win, thrive, soar
Higher, higher, higher
More fire."
They all were then back on the steps as Rachel and Santana were then singing.
"(I came to win), to fight, to conquer, to thrive
I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise."
Finn then was singing with the new directions boys as the girls sang backup vocals.
"I believe I can fly (Fly) {Fly}I believe I can touch the sky {Ooh-ooh, uh, yeah}
I believe I can fly (Fly)
I believe I can touch the sky {Fly}
I believe I can fly (Fly)
The girls were then singing backup vocals as Artie sang lead, as they were all back on the floor, moving in a circle.
"(Get ready for it, get ready for it) Then I can be it
(Get ready for it, I came to win) If I just believe it
(Get ready for it, get ready for it) There's nothing to it."
Mercedes then sang.
"Get ready for it."
The boys were then singing as the girls sang back up, they all were dancing.
"I believe I can fly (Fly) {Ooh-ooh}
I believe I can touch the sky {Fly}
I think about it every night and day (Fly) {Oh}
Spread my wings and fly away {Ooh, whoa}
(I can fly) I believe I can soar (Fly) {Get ready for it}
(I can fly) I see me runnin' through that open door {Get ready for it, fly}
{I can fly} I believe I can fly (Fly) (Woo) (Get ready for it)
I can fly) I believe I can fly
I believe I can (Fly)"
The song ended as the crowd was cheering, the new directions got off stage, letting the troubletones have their moment on stage, Caroline had headed over to the choir room to get her guitar and she had thought she was alone until her brother spoke up "dude, what's your problem? I mean we're getting alone one minute and then whenever I mention marrying Rachel you start freaking out on me." he told her, causing Caroline to quickly turn to him.
"Freaking out? Finn, you're a senior in high school! You barely know what you wanna do with your life or even what the rest of your life's gonna be. I just don't like that because everything else didn't work out that you're planning the rest of your life around what Rachel's gonna be doing instead of yourself. Because unlike her, I know you! And I know that you'd rather stay in Lima working in Burt's tire shop than being dragged off to New York City probably serving burgers or working at a parking garage. So I'm sorry if me wanting you to make a life for yourself rather then follow her around like a lost puppy the rest of your life makes me uninvited to your stupid wedding." she told him, grabbing her guitar and turning on her heel walking back out of the choir room.
Making it to the stage, she walked out and as she did the crowd stopped cheering, as she stood in front of the mic, she started to play her guitar as she started singing.
"I knew a boy once, when I was small
A tow-head blonde, with eyes of salt
He played the drum in the marching band
His parents cared more about the Bible
Than being good to their own child
He wore long sleeves 'cause of his dad
And somehow, we fell out of touch
Hope he took his bad deal and made a royal flush
Don't know if I'll see you again someday
But if you're out there, I hope that you're okay
Taking a deep breath, she continued playing the guitar, she looked up from it and out into the audience as she began signing the next verse.
"My middle school friend grew up alone
She raised her brothers on her own
Her parents hated who she loved."
And even though some of these stories weren't of people she knew fully, the next part of the song she wrote made her think about Santana when she had written it, and unknowing to her all the new directions were standing behind Mr Schuester watching her sing.
"She couldn't wait to go to college
She was tired 'cause she was brought
Into a world where family was merely blood
Does she know how proud I am she was created
With the courage to unlearn all of their hatred
We don't talk much but I just gotta say
"I miss you, and I hope that you're okay"
Address the letters, to the holes in my butterfly wings
Nothing's forever, nothing is as good as it seems
And when the clouds are ironed out
And the monsters creep into your house
And every door is hard to close
Then she started crying as she smiled, unknowing to her, so was everyone else in the audience as were Mr Schuester and the new directions.
"Well, I hope you know how proud I am you were created
With the courage to unlearn all of their hatred
God, I hope that you're happier today
'Cause I love you, and I hope that you're okay."
Playing the guitar out, the audience stood up, and all began to clap as were Mr Schuester and the new directions.
And soon, they were standing on the far left of the stage with the golden goblets in the middle and the warblers all the way to the right, as a coffin was brought out, it was soon opened to reveal Svengoobles as the crowd cheered, he walked up to the mic "I've crossed oceans of time..to bring the results of this show choir competition." he shared, as everyone clapped again "in third place, from our lady of perpetual sorrow..the golden goblets!" he shared, as the golden goblets cheered, as they walked off stage with their trophy.
"And now..the moment you've all been waiting for." Svengoobles told them, as Caroline and Sebastian were looking at each other from across the way, Blaine grabbed her hand "the 2012 midwest regional champion..from McKinley high, the new directions!" Svengoobers said as the crowd along with the new directions cheered, the others were holding up the trophy as Caroline nudged Blaine and motioned to the warblers, the two of them then began to walk over.
And as they did, Caroline held her hand out to Sebastian "you guys did good." she told him, as Sebastian brought his hand up and shook her hand "thank you, you guys did too." he told her, as he then turned and shook hand's with Blaine, while the other new directions were still cheering.
While everyone else headed to watch Finn and Rachel get married, Caroline had been standing on the auditorium stage, knowing she was back at the same moment in her life that she was last year, having won regionals and was on her way to nationals, yet she couldn't shake the feeling of losing again, but right now she finally turned and stepped off the stage, walking down the hallways of McKinley and to the choir room, stepping inside, she looked at the trophy case and stepped forward, putting their winning regionals trophy up there, and stepping back with a huge smile on her face.