Complicated by Avril Lavigne
Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated? I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else getting me frustrated.
I wake up at around 8.30am to a severely unpleasant nightmare.
In this dream I am back at the park, standing over the beaten boys body, except this time I don't run. I get caught by the police, I'm placed in jail for assault. My family and friends no longer visit me or even speak of me. I am forgotten. And worst of all, the person who was beaten is now seeking physiology for the trauma.
I wake up in floods of tears and sweat. I start sobbing into my hands, trying to keep quiet and avoid waking Grayson but he wakes up almost seconds later and sits up too.
He pulls me close to him and holds me, telling me everything is okay, gently stroking my hair.
Later that morning we go on as if nothing happened. Nobody questions anything because as far as they know there is nothing to question.
That night I received a text from Tiger.
Tiger: Hey, wanted to make sure you were okay, I know that was probably quite scary but I swear we don't do that often, that guy did something pretty bad and he knew what he was risking when he did that, he knew what we would do but did it anyway out of spite. Meet me tonight, i have something fun planned that doesn't include hurting people, just us girls no boys invited.
I decide to trust her and got dressed into a two piece dress and was ready to leave. It's around 1am as I slide into Tiger's worn down car. "Thanks for showing up, how you doing?" She asks.
"Last night I was a mess but I guess what you said about how bad of a guy he is made me feel a little better." I explain. "Good, he did the exact same thing to an allying gang member except he had to pay hitmen to do it for him cause he's weak." She adds.
"So what are we doing?" I ask excitedly as she begins driving. "Well first we're getting drunk, then I have a surprise." She smirks.
And so we go to a club. I drink until I feel like I'll throw up, then I drink some more. I lie on a pool table as these men in their thirties take it in turns to do shots from me.
I take a slice of lime in my mouth, a line of salt bellow where my breasts lie and my bellybutton filled as high as possible with various drinks. The men bite the lime in my mouth, lick all the salt and then suck out the drink.
Then a couple decide to switch things around and fill my mouth with the drink so they had to kiss me to drink it.
Once it reaches around 1am I get a little unamused with men slipping alcohol out of my crevices. So I locate Tiger who happily drags me to the surprise.
I walk hesitantly behind Tiger into the glowing Tattoo store. It's around half 1 in the morning. "So what are we doing here?" I ask as we wait by the front desk, Tiger rings the bell on the table obnoxiously until someone comes out of the room.
"What can I do this time Tiger?" The man covered in tattoos asks. "Here for a couple tattoos." She informs him. He nods in gesture for us to follow him into the dimly lit room, we do. I stand by the door whilst Tiger gets a tattoo of a really terribly drawn penis - and by penis I mean two circles and a long oval - on her ankle.
"You're next Cash." She smirks. "Me?" I laugh, "No the other Cash. Yes you." She jokes. I sit on the leather chair. "What you getting?" The man asks.
Tiger hands him a drawing and once he has looked at it well enough he nods. Tiger refuses to let me see it, "Do you trust me?" She asks, I nod. "As long as it's not a poorly drawn penis I do."
"Where?" The man asks. "One on her lower back, just at the start of her ass." Tiger tells him. "I'm getting an ass tattoo?" I ask astounded. "Well yeah." She nods as if it's nothing.
"Strip." The man orders. "What?" I laugh. "Get naked so I can tat you up." He says frustratedly.
So I take my pants and underwear of and roll over to let him start. He starts out by writing on my upper ass cheek. I can't quite make out what it says.
I try to ignore to pain I feel as I am stabbed a million little times.
Once he has wrapped it up I roll over and wince as I sit on my new tattoo.
He wastes no time in letting me know I can leave now. Right once I have my pants on again I see his brochure about different piercings.
I approach the list and flip through it.
"You do piercings here?" I ask. "Yeah well that is a piercing guide your looking through if I'm not mistaken." He says sarcastically.
"I want one." I tell him. I see Tiger smirk proudly.
I lay back on the table as he prepares his needle and the piercing.
I squeeze my eyes shut and let out a yelp when he stabs the needle into my sensitive skin. I bite down on my top lip as he inserts the piercing, not bothering much about hurting me.
I stand up once complete, my skin still aching and burning. I look in the full body length mirror at my nipple which now shines with the new hoop piercing. I grin satisfied.
Tiger takes me to the nearby Wendy's to get us food planning on quenching our mid morning munchies.
I make my way to the bathroom whilst Tiger orders for us and waits on the food. Instead of using the toilet I find myself stripping in the locked handicapped bathroom. I look to my tattoo first, slightly blurry due to the plastic covering. I peel it off slowly and reveal my tattoo.
I scoff a sort of laugh when I read it:
𝐼𝓃𝓈𝑒𝓇𝓉 𝒹𝒾𝒸𝓀 𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒
It reads in cursive with a little arrow towards my ass.
Then I unclip my bra, my nipple throbs painfully.
I look in the mirror at the slightly inflamed area. I try to twist the piercing a little but it just sends an ache through me, making me wince.
I try move it again seeing how much of the pain I can withhold, I manage only 5 seconds of twisting and moving. It feels like I'm poking a really painful bruise all the time.
I decide to get a quick photo of it on my phone. Then a photo of my tattoo.
I open my texts with Tiger,
Me: Just finishing up in here, will be out in a minute. I need to get some fucking sleep tonight, it's been a long one.
Once I get myself changed again and I eat my food with Tiger, both of us taking our drinks into the car with us as we drive home.
When Tiger gets me back to the House it's 2:45am, I creep in as quietly as possible. I turn around after closing the door and walk slowly into the dark hole of nothingness.
I walk until my body collides with what I initially determine to be a body, making me shriek in horror and jump.
The lights turn on and I'm met with the Hawthorne brothers, my sisters and Max. The person I walked into was Xander.
"How the fuck did you find me?" I hiss, out of breathe from the fear. "I received a text saying: 'Just finishing up in here, will be out in a minute. I need to get some fucking sleep tonight, it's been a long one.' When I checked your bed you weren't there so I put the pieces together.
"Shit." I mutter. "What's going on down here?" Oren fumes as he joins us. "Oh for fuck sake, it's the BFG!" I sigh as he approaches us. Xander gives me a weird look, "Big Fucking Gunman." I explain simply.
"Why are you all up at this time?" He asks once having reached us. "We're just watching the sunrise together." I smile innocently. "Paris is shitfaced." Jameson translates.
Oren looks at me surprised, "Why are you drunk?" He asks shocked. "Because it's a day of the week?" Grayson replies snarlingly.
"How much did you drink?" Oren asks carefully, "I'm sober!" I answer. Nobody says anything but it's clear everyone is thinking the same thing.
"Spell Cinnamon" Jameson orders. I start, "S-" I'm cut off my Grayson sighing "Jesus."
"I couldn't spell it sober. Give me something easier!" I beg, "2 + 3" Grayson suggests. I begin counting each of my fingers one my one slowly so I can figure out the answer.
Everyone sighs when they see me counting my fingers they start discussing what to do. It feels like simply just a moment as I count but about two or three minutes has gone by when I finally work out the answer. "5!" I yell out.
Everyone turns and stares at me astonished. "Good job, Babe. Good job." Xander jokes, stroking my back comfortingly.
"About thirty guys took shots out my belly button tonight." I announce proudly. Everyone sort of looks at me shocked and unsure what to say. "Strangers?" Avery asks. "Strangers are just friends you haven't met yet. Plus I kissed like half of them so I'd say we're pretty good friends now." I shrug.
"How old were these 'men'?" Jameson asks sceptically. "We'll mostly mid thirties but the youngest was 23 and the oldest was 58." I recall.
"Why the fuck did you let old perverts drink out of you?" Jameson asks with his voice slightly raised. "Cause it's fun. I had the lime in my mouth so when they lent down they bit it out my mouth, then the salt was in a line right under my boobs so they liked that then sucked the drink from my belly button. You wanna try?" I explain.
"No." All four Hawthornes say at the same time. "I swear Paris! You are never leaving this house again or so help me god i will-" Avery starts, "Oh calm down bitch." I scoff.
"No Paris, this isn't okay, you are sixteen. You shouldn't be doing any of these things. First you're just drinking but next you'll be getting tattoos, doing drugs and getting in trouble with the cops." Libby lectures. I kind of bite my lip, knowing that I've done all three things technically. I mean the cops showed up but they did catch us so I suppose maybe not that.
Everyone watches me carefully. "You've already done those things haven't you." Max sighs disappointed. "What? Of course not? Who do you take me for?" I ask astounded.
"Show us the tattoo." Grayson orders. "There's no tattoo to show you because i wouldn't even dream of getting one." I place my hand to my heart.
"Give us your phone then. She'll have photos on there." Max determines. "No!" I yell, realising I also have photos of my piercing, photos of people taking shots out of my belly button, me really high and drunk passed out.
"Then show us." Oren commands. I sigh and unzip my skirt at the back. I let it fall leaving me in just a thong, I turn around and reveal my new tattoo to everyone.
I hear Libby gasp and see Max and Xander both bite down on their lips with a sort of 'shit, she's gonna be in trouble' look. I turn around and see Jameson with wide eyes, Grayson staring at it with a clenched jaw, Nash looks very confused.
Oren is looking up, clearly not deeming it appropriate for him to look for any longer than he had to in order to read it. Avery looks angry and disgusted.
"You like it?" I ask excitedly. "What have you done! If your future boss were to see that you would be out of a job." Avery yells.
"Why would my boss be looking at my ass unless he was doing as the tattoo says." I shrug.
"Oh Paris you are really-" Avery fumes before I cut her off.
"Look I just need some ice and some sleep, we'll talk in the morning okay?" I beg everyone.
"No! If we don't talk right now we never will. I don't know what you think you are but you need to stop, if Mom were to see that tattoo you know how disappointed she would be in you. You're ruining your future and some day you're going to regret it." Avery seethes.
"Well guess what Ave. Mom's dead, so is Danny, and I've already lost Jay and Dad and all my friends." I shout.
"So what your saying is that's why you're out of character?" Avery asks softly.
"No, what I'm saying is I've already lost everyone else. So i don't care anymore if I lose you. So get the fuck out my way." I yell.
"Say your last goodbyes because I'm not coming back. Don't try to reach out either, I never want to hear from any of you again." I holler as I walk away.
Instead of going upstairs I make my way back to the door. As I pass between Grayson and Jameson, Jameson grabs me by the waist and tries to gently urge me back to him. "Paris come on." He begs softly.
"Get off of me Jameson." I mutter as I nudge him off. "Pear.." Libby cries out, I don't turn around because I know she's crying.
"So this is it? No more dance school? You're giving everything up to do drugs and drink your life away?" Avery yells as my hand touches the door.
I turn back around, Nash is holding Libby as she cries. Max and Xander are glancing at each other. Grayson and Jameson both stare directly into my eyes, silently begging me to stay. Oren stands behind Avery, trying to stay out of it. Avery has a couple tears in her eyes but she is mostly angry.
I don't falter as I open the door and leave.
I get my phone out of my back pocket and call Tiger.
(a/n. I don't know how I feel about this one, i know a lot of people don't like the whole gang plot line but I promise some character development is in progress. Let me know what you think, sorry I didn't upload last week.)