Life as a Secret *lesbian Story*

39

*I'd like to put a disclaimer about what I know from Amish. I know very little, so most will be made up, but some will be pretty factual*

*Spencer's POV*

I watched Demi walked out and once I saw her pull away, it registered what I've just done. 

"Shit " I cussed under my breath. 

I got up, closing up the shop before heading home.

I didn't know what to do.

What am I suppose to do?

Run back into her arms?

If I wanted that, I wouldn't have said goodbye, would I?

On the drive home, I felt very conflicted. 

I knew what I wanted to do, but then again I didn't know if that's what I really wanted. 

I liked Demi, I wanted to get to know her better, but I also know that in my life, where I am right now, going into a new relationship, was a lot. Let alone one that involves a child. 

I'm 22. 

I seem to forgot that I have a whole life ahead of me.

Not only am I just now entering adult hood, but I'm also still in school, still getting my shit together.

How the fuck am I suppose to enter a relationship, that's already complicated?

I hate when people say "It's worth the love". Because is it?

Is it worth the stress and complications?

I felt so unprepared. 

To think a few years ago, I was with my family, living the life I always knew. Few year's later, I'm a completely new person. I came out to myself, family and best friend. I got kicked out and had to move in with my friend. My whole life changed with one sentence "I'm gay".  Sometimes I wondered, if my family wasn't Amish, and if they didn't follow the rules of being them . . . if they would have accepted me and how different my life would be at this moment. 

I arrived home, my thoughts running a mile a minuet.

When I walked through the door, Oliver was going ballistic. 

"Well good day to you" I laughed, grabbing his leash after thanking my neighbor for puppy sitting.

"Wanna go for a walk?" I asked, kneeling down to clip his lead.

I took Oliver on a walk around the neighborhood.

As we were walking - in my sketching looking neighbor as Demi calls it - a girl and a guy approached me and Oliver started growling.

The guy tried to kick my dog, making him coward and me yell.

"DO NOT KICK MY FUCKING DOG YOU LITTLE SHIT!" I yelled and he laughed. 

It all happened so slowly, the gun, the bite and the scream.

It all seemed to happen in slow motion. 

The yelling, the dog bite, the gun shot, the screaming and pain.

I held my side, Oliver was attacking the guy with the gun and I heard another gun shot and his whimpering and I yelled, starting to make my way to the ground as I held my side in pain.

I saw blood coming out of Oliver, yet he was still attacking the man. 

His little body attacking the man and somehow, Oliver was winning.

The girl was robbing me but honestly I couldn't give a shit.

I saw them run and was crouching, adding pressure to my wound.

I carefully got up, and Oliver was whimpering but also licking my face. 

I carefully picked him up, his blood and my blood now on my hands.

I noticed they took my phone, money and everything that I had in my jacket pocket.

We were sort of far away from home, so I just started walking, holding onto my ribs where I was shot.

I tried walking home carefully, holding Oliver carefully on the other side where I wasn't wounded. 

I was about half way to where I needed to be, when I had tears rolling down my face from pain and I was trying to make sure Oliver was breathing. 

Heaps of people passing Oliver and I. 

All of a sudden a man came up to me and I started to cower.

"Ma'am! Are you alright?!" He asked, jogging up at me. 

"I've - My dog and I . . . . my dog and I have been  . . . We've been shot" I spoke shakily, tears rolling down my face from pain. 

I was glad I was able to breath and walk, but it hurt like a bitch.

He called 911 and had me sit down on the bench near by.

"Where were you shot?" He asked and I lifted my elbow, so he could see where I was holding my hand.

"Can you see where Oliver, my 4 month aussie was hit?" I plead and he nodded.

Oliver tried to bite his hand and I hit his nose with my finger lightly.  

"A ambulance is on it's way" He noted, checking Oliver over, finally spotting his wound.

"Can you take him to the doggy hospital? I'll have someone meet up with you. I can call my neighbor. Just, I want him to get checked over and make sure he is okay" I plead, not wanting my puppy to die.

He seemed conflicted but nodded.

After about 15 minutes, a ambulance showed up and I was on my way to the hospital, this man - who gave me his phone number - took my baby to the doggy hospital.

Somehow, I trusted him with my pride and joy, and I didn't even know his name.

* * * * 

A/N: Anyone watch the Christmas Story Live? I watched it while writing this. Granted I missed the beginning, thanks to a 8 week old puppy that is currently frustrating me.

Written on: 12 / 17 / 17

Published on: 12 / 19 / 17

Word Count: 950