REM

Zero Sense

Images mashed together; still shots, action shots, segments of memory that are apparently all mine. I don't even remember half the shit. Actually, no. I definitely don't even remember half. I'm lucky if I remember a quarter, or even feel as though they are my own memories. Sometimes they give me the sense of déjà vu, but other times I am left in a world of confusion, a sinking abyss to nowhere. I don't know how it came to this...

One day I remember making an appointment with my doctor, except the location was different, I was different. There was something strange about the steps I took and where my body was taking me. My memory hasn't been the greatest recently, which leads me to wonder if I was drugged. I rarely take chances in my life without thinking them through, so someone I trust, or thought I could trust, clearly slipped me something. None of this makes any sense anymore.

The day of the appointment, I remembered feeling disoriented, lost and concerned. I arrived at a building I didn't recognize. Lights in the hallway were dim as I walked up a flight of winding stairs for fear the elevator would stop working if I tried to use it. At the top floor I walked into the hall to see three chairs outside an office, each one filled by a seated person. They were shrouded in darkness due to the poor lighting. I continued past them, walking through a partition as I tried to remember... tried to remember...

Then suddenly it hit me. I had been here before, but this wasn't my doctor's building. It couldn't have been. The woman I remembered from some other place had an office here, so I went to each door in the darkening hallway, hoping to find her. Some rooms were locked, some so dark I didn't dare enter, while others were lit, but only momentarily as the lights began to flicker as I pushed the door open a mere inch. Retreating from every door one after the other, I noticed the end of the hall was dark. No red, emergency exit sign was visible, nothing. The hall just seemed to end.

Turning around, I noticed a room I had missed. I walked toward it, opening the door to find the woman I knew. She kept switching back and forth between two similar faces, both of which I recognized.

"Hello, Steven," she greeted. "What are you doing here?"

"I have an appointment," I answered. "But this is the wrong building. I've never been here before. My doctor isn't in this building. They must have screwed up."

"Who's they?"

I had no clue. It was me who walked to the building, me who felt confused, lost, and disoriented. Looking up at her from the tiled floor, she was gone. Her swivel chair on wheels now sat vacant, just like the hallway outside her office. How the...

Leaving her office behind, I turned out into the hallway once more, the lighting still the same. I swore I heard voices, or at least one voice from a room with light coming from the ajar door, but I dared not disturb whoever was in there. This place was giving me the creeps, and yet I still had an appointment with "my" doctor.

Soon I was passing back through the partition in the hallway, the three chairs now void of bodies in a matter of minutes, which I knew was damn well near impossible. Someone was messing with me, they just had to be. I wasn't going crazy, no, that's just not possible. I'm as sane as they come!

The office door closest to me beckoned. I reached for the handle and walked in as fear left my system. A female sat on the far side with a folder in her hands.

"Nice to see you again."

Brow furled, "What?"

"Are you not my next patient?"

"No, I think there's been a mistake. My doctor sent me here by accident."

"Nonsense, I know who you are and why you're here. Please, sit down."

The dark haired woman smiled as she got comfortable in her black chair again. Everything was dark in colour, or so near-black that I couldn't tell the difference. Her pencil skirt distracted me for an instant as I sat down on the weathered, black leather couch. A table in the middle had magazines on it, but the colours faded to grays as soon as I noticed them.

"So tell me what's wrong." Her voice wasn't familiar, yet for some reason I felt comfortable opening up to her.

"I've been having strange dreams and flashbacks lately. I thought it was a side effect of drugs, or something."

"We both know that's not the case, Steven." She did know my name. Shit.

"I should go..." My eyes locked onto the coffee table, but I froze.

"That wouldn't be wise, your assessment hasn't been completed. We need to run a few tests to make sure you're not going crazy."

"What tests?" I asked, my eyes finally breaking free to look over at her smiling face.

"Just some simple ones. A few questions, a few examples of dreams, or images you've seen lately. We need to know what is going on in that head of yours."

Madness, that's what is going on in my head right now.