0.3: Restless

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My house was dark, as we pulled up into the driveway. "I hope you had fun." Ethan says, putting the car in park. His hand runs through his curly hair, as he looks at me.
"I did. I had a lot of fun." I say. "Thank you for taking me." The last few hours of the party, we sat on a couch, and watched as people danced around, tripping over themselves. His hand occasionally brushed up against my thigh, but he was quick to movie it away.
"I'm glad. I'm sad this night has to end though." He sighs, the car quietly rumbles.
I get out of the car, and he follows me up to my door. The urge to kiss him is there, but I can't bring myself to do it. "I guess this is good bye." I say, smiling sadly. I won't see him again, until the tour, and that will really be the last.
"Don't say it like that." His sadness clear in his voice. "We could always keep in contact."
I shake my head. "This was fun while it lasted." I shove my hands under my arms, trying to keep warm.
"What? While it lasted? So, you're just going to cut me off?" His tone harsh. His eyes darken, and I look away.
"No, I'm just saying a friendship obviously isn't going to work. I'm a fan and your famous. Things like this don't work, because you'll have to worry about me, and I don't need you to feel like you have to talk to me, so its better we end whatever we started." The truth is like a knife in my chest. How can a twenty-four hour friendship, hurt so much to lose?
"You act like we're breaking up? Why can't we at least try? You're such a good person, I can't just let you go."
This is something I dreamed of as a little girl. Having some type of relationship with my idol, but now that it's happening, I feel like I'm holding him back.
Ethan touches my arms, and I look up at him. "Just try." He whispers, and I cave.
I don't even know why I was fighting with myself.
"I'll text you." I say. I unlock the door, and go inside. "Good night, Ethan."
"Good night." A frown still clear on his face, as I close the door, not a single hug or sign of affection.

I toss and turn in my bed, as the thoughts of today's party run through my mind. It was something to always remember. Going to a party with two people I've seen on YouTube for years is amazing, and I practically ruined it by trying to cut Ethan off for no reason. I tried to cut him off for no reason, and I was so rude. Oh shit.
I grab my phone, and text him in a hurry. The guilt courses through my veins, as I send him a text.

Me: I can't sleep. I feel guilty for being so mean earlier. I'm sorry.

He texts back quickly.

Ethan: It's alright. I'm just confused on what you were thinking. You're explanations didn't really make sense to me.

Me: What are you still doing awake?

I change the subject, not wanting to upset him more.

Ethan: I can't sleep, just like you.

Me: Insomnia?

Ethan: No, if I'm being completely honest, it's because I can't stop thinking about you.

What. The. Fuck. I reread the last message over and over, as I try to understand the meaning.

Ethan: Did I scare you off?

Me: No, sorry, I had to grab my charger.

What a fat lie, but he must be messing with me. Or maybe I'm interpreting the message wrong.

Ethan: Well anyways, I'm free tomorrow, and if you are too, would you be down to hangout?

Hangout? Hangout, oh my god. I sit up straight in my bed, as my fingers tap the phone screen.

Me: I don't have plans, and is this your way of getting up on my list?

I smile to myself, as I watch the 'typing...' chat bubble pop up. Maybe this friendship will be good after all.

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