Kylo Ren X Reader

Chapter 1

"Leia, I don't want to go and train with these people, you know how capable I am with defending myself," you huffed.

Your life had gone to shit on that stupid planet, not only were you dragged into the Resistance's playing fields but now you had to train to be a better force user. Turns out that Leia had a few more apprentices up her sleeve and you had to follow them around for a few days, bunch of twelve year old amateurs, why would you need to be trained? You'd taught the ways of the force to yourself you were pretty sure you didn't need to be babied. You think she was just trying to do you good because she'd messed up pretty badly with her own son, wasn't much chance of getting him back now, and with Solo, dead, she was quite beaten.

Starkiller base had been destroyed however, but a small insignificance to the ways Leia would have to suffer. You did feel sorry for her, in some ways, perhaps that is why you hadn't left when she had convinced you to join her side. As for the reason she knew you used the force, well that was Maz's fault, apparently she had known for some time which only made you even more careful to block it at all costs. Maz had told Leia and Leia had somewhat recruited you.

Somewhat.

You'd leave when you were ready, with enough time you'd have finished your saber and could go forth and not give a damn about the sides again. Life would be good once more.

"You are not going to defend yourself ____ you are going because you need to find peace, you're too stressed, to truly understand the side of the light, you must become one with yourself."

"Right..." you said noticing Leia was actually being deadly serious, "sorry yes of course. Just don't expect me to babysit."

"You will not travel alone, I have constructed a team to join you," Leia smiled sweetly, it was sickening you could barely stand another second with this woman. My god you wished Kylo had taken you on his ship that day and showed you the ways of the dark side, at least then you might have had some fun.

~~~

It was the third day of your hike and you had finally settled down to camp, you didn't really like the three other boys that used the force, they were like well trained puppies, the representation of boredom itself.

You'd decided to eat in your tent tonight, you were shattered from all the walking you had been doing and you weren't fond of the other leaders any way. You tried really hard to remind yourself why you had been doing this again, but you came up with nothing. You'd not gotten better at using the force, you hadn't made any friends, you hadn't been saved. No, the conclusion you came to was merely the fact that the Resistance had the materials to build a saber and also had the wits to keep you safe from the dark side.

Safe being a relative term.

After many arguments over your departure date in your head you found yourself drifting to sleep, the weightlessness of your body in that moment, felt amazing.

~~~

You woke up in a shock, you didn't know why but you felt as though you were missing something obvious. You checked your clock, you'd been asleep a few hours, the rest of camp was surely asleep by now, you thought it wouldn't hurt to go for an evening stroll.

Once you'd left your tent an overwhelming sadness washed over you. You couldn't put your finger on it yet, but you would get there, it was late and you'd only just woken up. You walked back to the centre of camp having pitched your tent with the door facing away from it, which made you realise you hadn't really been all that friendly during the whole trip. Not like it mattered now, you'd decided that after this trip, you were leaving the Resistance for good.