I Am The Alpha (Part 1/2)

I am the Alpha - Part 59

HEY.

Thank you all for reading and voting :) and commenting! It means a lot to know you enjoy reading "i am the Alpha." 

I'm going to make this quick because it's getting late and i have to edit some more of the start tonight as well. :)

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As i walk further into the forest Cole falls into step beside me, his pack just behind and the guard on every side, but I hardly notice as I fight my own emotions from taking over just long enough that I can hold my tribe in place until we’ve crossed the boundaries. Every footstep I take echoes through my mind; painfully reminding me that they will be my last in my home. I force myself not to check in on the tribe or pack link but can’t yet bring myself to sever them but at the same time their emotions still carry through my mind hauntingly.

I ignore any attempts made by those around me to get a response knowing they can do nothing about it until we reach the boundaries. I had made Cole agree to leaving me be until I’m out of my territory, telling him that it was to prevent  my pack from coming to defend their territory and he had reluctantly agreed.

I look up at the somehow daunting pale blue sky and the feeling of loneliness and loss almost consumes me. My eyes trace the fin whips of grey cloud, which bring no promise of rain, just linger idly. Is that what I will become? I drop my eyes to the large trees surrounding us and my eyes one again linger, this time tracing the peeling bark and tangled notches that make up their beautiful imperfections. Will there be trees like this where we’re going? Will I even care? Can there be such a thing as beauty in such a hateful place? Would someone as heartless as Cole even notice?

My thoughts continue to trail off into nothingness as I keep my main focus on holding my tribe in place while we walk further and further towards the edge. For hours we walk and it takes everything i have to keep placing one foot in front of the other. I hardly notice where we’re going, just knowing that it is away.

After what seems like an eternity my head whips up to find myself looking at the border into Keith’s territory. Keith’s? Why in the world has he led us here? The guard ahead of me continues to walk over the invisible line that I usually wouldn’t ever bother to cross, Keith’s pack aren’t worth it.

 I follow until the guard comes to a stop along with everyone else and they all turn to bore their eyes into me. I ignore them as I sit cross-legged on the hard, earthy ground. I delve deep into my mind and my vision of the things in front of me disappears as the thoughts of my pack consume me completely. Their anger and sorrow pulses dangerously as they sit in the same positions i had locked them in several hours ago. I release them from the mental paralysis and straight away a few of them jump to their feet.

I take on last painstaking look before reaching into the routes of the links and removing them from me mentally before snapping every chord that ever had attached itself to me. I gasp as the air is jolted out of me painfully and a feeling of emptiness and loss buzzes through me, seeping in through any resistance I had previously put up. It consumes every part of me, making me cry out in dismay and bitter tears roll down my paled cheeks as I collapse partially in my cross legged position  my eyes still locked tightly shut.

It’s all gone. Forever.

The tears continue to stream onto the ground around me and my nails dig into my own skin creating pain that doesn’t fully register. I shake wildly out of control as my breaths come out in gasps almost choking me in the process. I don’t care how I might look to those around me the pain is too much to care.